Miscellaneous: Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my...

By Toothy - 02/04/2011 05:03 - United States

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 988

You deserved it 50 052

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Same thing different taste

By nicole - 22/09/2011 10:31 - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 399

You deserved it 5 428

By Anonymous - 13/08/2019 20:00

Today, my friend was extremely constipated when he used my toilet. I'm now having to go buy a new toothbrush, because he used mine to dig out his shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 214

You deserved it 164

By aggghghgh - 14/05/2016 08:51

Today, I found out my whole family has been mistakenly using the same toothbrush for over a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 545

You deserved it 2 121

By Anonymous - 20/04/2016 14:34 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, after a fight, I caught my sister rubbing my toothbrush on the inside of our grimy toilet. This is why I have trust issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 158

You deserved it 1 563

By upliftmofo - 28/03/2011 05:56 - Belgium

Today, I discovered my cat frequently licks my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 665

You deserved it 5 983

By clean - 16/09/2013 07:51 - Australia - Ashfield

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 175

You deserved it 4 294

Ouch

By Anonymous - 31/07/2020 02:03

Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 568

By Anonymous - 13/05/2013 05:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was visiting, and while in the bathroom, she clogged the toilet. Since there was no plunger in the room, she unclogged it with the only thing she could find: my mother's hairbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 021

You deserved it 5 246

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 16:14 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I refused to share a toothbrush with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 843

You deserved it 6 289

By captfml - 15/12/2010 22:32 - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without thinking, I put hand soap on my toothbrush. I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 311

You deserved it 27 716

fayettie 3

Saturday 2 April 2011 12:16

wow! your wife is just every type of wrong fyl!

MuffyStJacques 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 12:26

I wouldn't want to put up with your shit, either.

Comments

chosha_fml 26

Saturday 2 April 2011 23:24

That punishment really doesn't fit the crime. She sounds kinda feral.

TeaLover_fml 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 23:26

Payback's a bitch.

griffbg08 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 0:08

I'd file for divorce...I'm just sayin.

lonerftl 3

Sunday 3 April 2011 0:30

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

andre5006 2

Sunday 3 April 2011 0:33

You have got to be joking. One thinks comes to mind Di-vorce !!!

SettoFail 9

Sunday 3 April 2011 0:41

how does he even deserve that? and what kind of wife does that?!? HELLO she's the one who has to kiss that mouth I mean what the ****?

kaitlyn15bp 5

Sunday 3 April 2011 0:58

that's absolutely disgusting! poor you

RideLifeAway 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 0:59

Ummmmmm Kind gross for you both dont ya think? lol You brush your teeth with it and being your wife, Im assuming she gives you a kiss at some point during the day.... I think its kind of a double fail lol

alicec123 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 1:10

''if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie''

sappy0 5

Sunday 3 April 2011 1:18

lmao!!! WIN for the wife!!! ;)

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Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 487

You deserved it 38 932

Today, it's only day three of my annual vacation. Rest and relaxation? Afraid not! For the past days, I've been haunted by the constant thought of how much work will be piled up when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 139

The Top

Today, I’m married to a man who thought Trump had several good ideas but just went about it the wrong way, but he’s sure he’ll do better next time when he takes the White House back from Biden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 082

You deserved it 783

Today, I found out that my ten-page paper, which has taken me two months to construct perfectly and is worth 30% of my grade, was on the wrong book. It’s due tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 190

You deserved it 2 327

Today, my boyfriend picked me up from school. It was an unusually sweet gesture from him, and I was flattered. That is, until he told me to sit my ass in the back, so his dog could ride in front with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 062

You deserved it 4 778

Today, on the way home from the dog groomer, my great Dane had a bout of diarrhea in the car. I slammed on the brakes and my other freshly shampooed dog slid off the seat and into the pile of crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 694

You deserved it 11 264

Today, to spice things up a bit, my wife and I were having sex in our kitchen. She was up on the counter and I moved her over to get in a better position. The stove was still hot from dinner, so now my wife has a burn that looks like a double rainbow on her ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 108

You deserved it 36 950

Today, my ex sent me a pack of beer to screw with me. I'm still going to AA, and I thought I was almost over it. Five bottles later, I realized I'm not. We didn't break up over my drinking, either; it was because after just 2 weeks of dating, she threatened to kill herself if I didn't marry her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 159

You deserved it 4 056

Same thing different taste

Ouch

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