Work: Today, I lied and said I was late for work because my car's tire...

By M to the line - 11/01/2009 03:57 - France

Today, I lied and said I was late for work because my car's tire was flat. Two hours later, some of my friends came in and said something along the lines that "We should do brunch every saturday, (like this morning) it was awesome!" in front of my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 075

You deserved it 32 494

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Same thing different taste

By viabbey - 24/08/2019 16:00 - United States - Cadillac

Today, after waking up in a panic since I slept through my alarm, I hurriedly got ready and started speeding to work. On the way, I texted my boss to apologize for running late. His response? "It's Saturday." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 501

You deserved it 700

Liar !

By Anonymous - 14/03/2020 09:00

Today, I lied and told my friends I was a compulsive liar. Well, I think I lied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 1 289

By AGB10 - 23/06/2014 18:11 - United Kingdom - Tunbridge Wells

Today, I made an excuse and didn't turn up at work. Little did I know my boss did the same. We both bumped into each other at the shopping centre across town. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 869

You deserved it 25 859

By Fml - 22/04/2018 15:00

Today, a co-worker called in sick due to a family emergency. I ended up working an unplanned 12-hour overnight shift. After I clocked out, I dragged myself out to the parking lot to go home. Someone had smeared tacos all over my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 482

You deserved it 215

By RandomTurtle109 - 19/03/2016 12:40 - United States - White River Junction

Today, I woke up late, got ready within 10 minutes, and drove to work. I walked in and apologized to my boss. He said, "Go home, it's your day off…" Walk of Shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 981

You deserved it 3 624

By nightfall8705 - 17/08/2017 19:30 - United States - Walhalla

Today, I had to make my boss believe that I was late to work because my sick dog shit all over my bedsheets and I had to clean up the mess before work. The truth is, I don't have a dog, and I wrongly trusted a long fart this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 369

You deserved it 1 159

By Shitty Boss Shitty Job - 15/06/2013 05:41 - United States - Davenport

Today, I woke up at 5:30 and made the half hour drive to work only to find out that it was my day off. After finally getting back home and into bed, my boss called, requesting that I come back to work since I was "already up". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 032

You deserved it 6 566

Classic

By Daniel - 09/08/2021 16:01

Today, at work, I casually mentioned I was meeting some friends for dinner. My co-worker's response was, "You have friends?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 100

You wish!

By Anonymous - 22/04/2012 02:22 - United States

Today, on my first day of a new factory job, I discovered that my new boss had lied to me about my hours. I found this out when my coworkers burst out laughing when I mentioned having the weekends off, and talking about my recreational plans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 816

You deserved it 2 480

By Ilovelife07 - 14/01/2010 15:14 - United States

Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 733

You deserved it 46 540

CammyGal 26

Monday 17 September 2012 16:19

"Today, I lied..." YDI.

nafiul93 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 3:56

lol what dumbasses hope u got em back

Comments

nafiul93 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 3:56

lol what dumbasses hope u got em back

tyler907 10

Friday 27 March 2009 3:38

why are you working at a place where you have to work saturdays?

fakedsincerity 32

Monday 9 December 2013 2:23

for the money?

ravens42 8

Thursday 12 June 2014 17:09

Dumbass. For money or they work less on weekdays

ohhhhshizzz 0

Saturday 2 May 2009 16:32

ydi.

TheSickness 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 7:40

Uh. Agreed with number 2 and 3.

YeTi_MaNN 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:56

hah smooth.

fuhrer 0

Monday 2 November 2009 23:23

You're tire still could have gotten flat...?

jakeidk 0

Tuesday 29 December 2009 8:53

brunch is duh bomb screw your manager (not literally) and get a weekday job and have brunch on Saturdays

happyhak 5

Tuesday 19 January 2010 22:40

YDI so badly words cant describe it...geez, if you are gonna skip work for brunch at least hang out with friends that will keep their mouths shut!

tb15 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 4:11

YDI lazy dude

FMylifeAlltheTim_fml 0

Sunday 16 May 2010 6:40

ydi man

Keywords

Miscellaneous Neighbours Awkward Wanker Halloween Lonely Love Party Jealousy Family Argument Fight Animals Cats Parents Health Embarrassing Sports Shopping Medication Birds Anger issues Weddings Pranks YouTube TikTok Dogs Cute Work AITA

The Top

Today, my wife hit a new level of clingy when she picked the lock on the bathroom door so she could sit with me while I shat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 73

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You deserved it 17

The Top

Today, I made my mom a mix CD for her car. It took me ages to find just the right songs that would be perfect for her. When I played it for her in the car, she took it out and threw it out of the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 683

You deserved it 5 399

Today, I impulsively cussed at a driver who was tailgating and honking at me. My mom, who is very religious and a school principal, was with me and it's extremely awkward between us now. Did I mention it's just the two of us on a week-long road trip? FML

I agree, your life sucks 598

You deserved it 304

Today, after sex, my boyfriend turned to me and said, “I need to check something down there.” I asked what but he just smiled and showed me the piece of gum he was chewing. He took a look and left to get the scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 943

You deserved it 874

Today, I drove in heavy rain for the first time, by myself. I had been told to drive below the speed limit, and be extra careful of the cars around me. Nobody had told me about thunder scaring a cow that would then escape from the corral and hit my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 730

You deserved it 1 805

Today, I was fired when a customer called corporate, saying I was unprofessional and rude. The "customer" in question was my little sister, who I would not let buy beer with a fake ID. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 341

You deserved it 3 086

Today, I realized my success rates for sex in my committed relationship were really, really low, so I've decided to stop trying for a while. I also recently have learned Excel. I made a pretty complex tracker if I ever decide to try again to monitor failures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 187

Same thing different taste

Liar !

Classic

You wish!

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