By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Spicy
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 974
You deserved it 3 073
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Top comments

CoolCookie210 22

That's disappointing. On the bright side, now you can gossip to your friends about how awful it was.

370 34
betweenwinds 18

Let him brag to his friends this once (embarrassing him won't help anything), but also let him know that you heard and now expect his performance to (eventually) match up to his boasts. He'll improve with some practice. ;)

173 9

Comments

foxmatrix15 8

If it ever gets outta hand embarrass him in front of his friends "honey, I didn't say you were the best... I said you tried your best you just didn't hear me"

37 4
greeneyedx 23

Men are so sensitive about their "manhood." I mean I wouldn't have blamed him for making himself sound better in bed but he's just lying through his teeth here...

0 0
Solano2580 24

The gloating part is overdoing it, but YDI for seeming like you expected much more and are considering being platonic

1 27
allplayedout 20

"YDI for wanting a satisfying dog sexual experience and being upset that your boyfriend is sharing/lying about extremely private information with his friends"

18 2
CoffeeChickBlows 13

Ummm... if she wanted a satisfying "dog" sexual experience, then yeah telling his friends instead of the police is kinda dumb.

3 4
allplayedout 20

I have no idea how the **** that ended up in there, yet another mysterious addition sent from my iPhone

3 1
THEDUDE1553566 24

I would have called him out on that lie if I were yiu

8 4
klutz44 28

If it was he probably would have told a different story to each one of his friends.

3 0
AmIReallyRenee 20

Men will say whatever crap to make other men inferior. shame really. And it's the same with women. I feel bad that OP'S first experience came out to be a waste

3 1
dyscomonkee 12

Last time he gets it I hope

3 2
worldclassrager 39

Love the name... For some reason I hope his friends see this...

5 0
EvilLittleMan 23

Bust his balls in front of his buddies by saying he's lucky that a 0 was added to the two making him a 20 Second Man instead of a Two Second Man.

5 2