Health: Today, I'm so sick that I'm drinking fluids just to make it hurt... - FML

By cmoney6452 - 01/03/2012 16:17 - United States

Today, I'm so sick that I'm drinking fluids just to make it hurt less when I puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 191

You deserved it 2 515

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By SickSmick - 09/02/2010 12:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning, and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 592

You deserved it 3 492

By Anonymous - 13/01/2014 20:35 - United States - New Iberia

Today, I puked up an anti-nausea pill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 250

You deserved it 4 919

By Anonymous - 26/10/2015 04:42

Today, after finishing a bottle and a half of pure cranberry juice to flush my bladder for a possible infection, I've been spewing liquid shits all day, my asshole burns and it hurts to sit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 545

You deserved it 5 753

By Preggo - 10/12/2016 01:51

Today, I vomited so hard into the toilet that the water splashed back into my face. I instinctually moved away only to finish puking on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 600

You deserved it 860

By Sickie. - 02/09/2010 16:03 - United States

Today, I had a stomach virus. I tried to make myself throw up to feel better. My long nails sliced open my throat from the inside, and I threw up blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 298

You deserved it 59 977

Waiting for a Xmas miracle

By Anonymous - 25/12/2022 12:00 - Australia

Today, I'm in agony. I can't eat or drink anything without being in pain, including water. Doctors don't know what's wrong with me, and can only prescribe me painkillers I can only take 3 times a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 970

You deserved it 142

Lava

By not_fakingit - 22/09/2013 04:26 - Canada - Montr?al

Today, I joked with my boss about calling in sick to work tomorrow with food poisoning to avoid taking the Sunday shift. Tonight, I'm sitting on the toilet bowl in agonizing pain with combination diarrhea and vomiting. My shift starts in 3 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 563

You deserved it 11 247

Hangover

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 14:00

Today, I got really sick after drinking a lot of alcohol and started throwing up. Every time I threw up into the toilet, the water would splash back up into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 830

You deserved it 3 173

By jdch_99 - 03/11/2012 05:34 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 792

You deserved it 1 747

Wardrobe change please

By Meagan Ortiz - 16/08/2020 23:02

Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 553

You deserved it 260

Next

Top comments

Dommon 7

Thursday 1 March 2012 18:52

You have to drink in order to clean your body and have something to bake with.

DontClickOnMe 28

Thursday 1 March 2012 18:53

Aww I hate the feeling of throwing up. It hurts like hell. Hope you feel better, OP!

Comments

melibear89 7

Friday 2 March 2012 2:40

Keep drinking those fluids OP. the worst thing than hurting while you puke is being in the hospital and hurting while you puke. I'm currently in the hospital due to puking so much it shot my blood sugars real high and you don't wanna be connected to an IV or two and be puking. Feel better OP.

PRpandaz 6

Friday 2 March 2012 3:57

I love the feeling after I throw up.

SkateboardGirl88 11

Friday 2 March 2012 4:13

Oh I'm sorry! I hope you feel better! :(

ClumsyKee 14

Friday 2 March 2012 4:15

I JUST got over a bad case of food poisoning, so I totally understand. It's terrible... I hope you get better soon! c:

nelon 7

Friday 2 March 2012 5:15

Sorry OP :( i have the same problem as you do! hope you get better soon :)

KaitlynxD 5

Friday 2 March 2012 5:29

This doesn't really seem FML worthy

Calyx_fml 21

Friday 2 March 2012 6:20

Coconut water. Lots of it.

hateevryone 14

Friday 2 March 2012 6:31

what do you have?

brendokendo 0

Friday 2 March 2012 7:30

Wow I didn't know that liquids were meant for drinking.

linkinpark98 23

Friday 2 March 2012 7:47

Ouch... You'll see better days, OP.

3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Transportation Poopoo peepee Cars Health Awkward Dentist Love Shopping My ex Animals Cats Clothes Work Job interview Miscellaneous Weird Holidays Family Vacation Parents AITA Am I overreacting? Annoying Funerals Relatable Harassment Engagement Ironic Food Money

The Top

Today, while at work, I saw a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said, "Yep… that just happened," and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 057

You deserved it 3 210

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 22

The Top

Today, I was running late for work and sprinted to catch the bus. As I got on, panting heavily, I realized I'd forgotten my wallet. The driver gave me a pity look and let me ride for free. I thanked him and sat down, only to discover I was on the wrong bus, heading in the opposite direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 250

Today, I, a 40 year-old who has been playing chess for over 25 years, was beaten by my own 12 year-old son. To make it worse, I actually fell for the Fool’s Mate, which to those who don’t know is the shortest possible checkmate in chess that only involves two moves. Yes, TWO MOVES. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 1 070

Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriend's emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 449

You deserved it 4 566

Today, I saw that my ex-boyfriend was online and had no plans. I felt extreme happiness knowing he had no life. Then I realized that I was online and had no plans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 858

You deserved it 37 550

Today, I had the cops called on me for acting suspiciously. I was using a payphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 689

You deserved it 4 014

Today, a woman accused me of bullying her son, and said that she is going to get me fired. Her son is a 27-year-old teacher at my school, whom I disciplined for showing up drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 344

You deserved it 2 653