Love: Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I...

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By daniel55 - 18/02/2013 00:11 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 406

You deserved it 5 871

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

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Same thing different taste

By TronCat8230 - 20/05/2017 12:00

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 088

You deserved it 2 172

By thisisavirus.exe - 31/12/2013 20:57 - United States - Sherwood

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 221

You deserved it 5 554

By Anonymous - 04/01/2014 23:13 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 712

You deserved it 5 702

Very very frightening

By graham - 11/01/2020 14:00

Today, my first time meeting my girlfriend's dad ended with him chasing me from his house and trying to hit me with a baseball bat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 860

You deserved it 359

By pdub523 - 27/01/2013 05:57 - United States - Longview

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 206

You deserved it 3 817

Time to leave

By Anonymous - 12/05/2023 18:00 - Australia

Today, I was meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time. When I went to shake her dad's hand, I broke his watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 694

You deserved it 166

By Anonymous - 12/04/2013 09:24 - Australia

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 773

You deserved it 6 945

By whattheactualfuck - 22/01/2016 12:50 - South Africa - Durban

Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 861

You deserved it 3 411

First impressions

By Jes_jes18 - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. I introduced myself and went to shake her hand. She looked me up and down and said, "I don't shake hands with whores." FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 461

You deserved it 7 755

Gravel?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad at a tennis game. I could tell he despised me from the start, but it only got worse when I played him. He smashed the ball at me and I went to hit it, but I missed and fell over, tearing my arm up on the gravel. He had a smirk on his face for the rest of the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 815

You deserved it 4 319

BRLHP 24

Monday 18 February 2013 3:04

Sounds like he really likes ya.

jojo66567 5

Monday 18 February 2013 3:05

sounds like a real nutcracker

Comments

icepick23 12

Tuesday 19 February 2013 20:11

You should threaten him

nvo 6

Wednesday 20 February 2013 8:51

From a parent's perspective, this is almost funny. I wouldn't worry too much, but mind your manners around him

Timber147 9

Wednesday 20 February 2013 13:04

Better be nice!

tribb_89 8

Saturday 23 February 2013 12:39

That's gonna be me if I have a daughter

katt_is_here 24

Saturday 2 March 2013 7:25

Look out! We've got a badass over here! ooooo and he calls himself "big" Mike. Just a tip, when a girl says that it's an okay size, she really means it is small.