Today, I needed to grab something from the garage. As soon as...

By ScaredDad - 02/05/2019 12:00

Today, I needed to grab something from the garage. As soon as the door closed, I heard a little click sound. My one-year-old seems to have figured out the door lock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 862

You deserved it 255

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Same thing different taste

Call the Midwife-slash-Locksmith

By mama bear - 16/10/2019 18:00

Today, my one-year-old son locked me out of the house. I had no spare key and both him and my 4-month-old decided that was the perfect time to scream bloody murder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 458

You deserved it 339

This is terrible!

By Baddad - 24/11/2019 20:00

Today, as I stepped out the door and heard it lock behind me, I realized I had forgotten both my keys and my baby inside. There's no other way in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 031

You deserved it 1 117

By Amber Rutledge - 27/01/2018 00:00

Today, my 2-year-old learned how to open the fridge lock. I came out of the bathroom to what she called a "scrambled egg breakfast". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 836

You deserved it 440

By emergencyroom - 15/03/2014 12:21 - United States - Parkton

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 467

You deserved it 9 394

By wished i had a cat - 19/10/2018 17:30

Today, I discovered that my dog knows how to lock doors. This wouldn't have been a problem if anyone in my house every carried a key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 366

You deserved it 632

The wrong sort of lock in

By Anonymous - 10/08/2021 09:59 - South Africa

Today, I gave my 10-month-old the house keys to keep her busy. I locked the burglar gate and left the door open. She can walk, and she threw the keys outside the gate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 1 359

By mr_flarpin - 22/08/2012 00:37 - United States - Stoneham

Today, I got stumped by a childproof door. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 263

You deserved it 7 546

Double trouble

By Tom Riddle - 19/12/2016 12:24 - Philippines

Today, I was about to go out and get some groceries, but the moment I slammed the door I realized my keys were still inside. My inner caveman instincts told me to immediately break down the door, so now I have to get a doorknob replacement instead of food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 356

You deserved it 2 326

By Cuzles - 23/03/2011 16:11 - United States

Today, I locked the door to our only bathroom so my two year old wouldn't get in and make a mess. I crapped my pants while trying to unlock it with the key that rests on the frame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 594

You deserved it 36 224

By brandon - 10/01/2011 17:04 - Canada

Today, I spent 30 minutes trying to unlock my garage door. After shouting several profanities, my roommate walked up to me, turned the key the other way, and unlocked it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 629

You deserved it 33 372

swervelol 28

Thursday 2 May 2019 18:44

How could a one year old reach the door lock?

carey33 15

Saturday 4 May 2019 16:17

My one year old pushed a laundry basket up to the door and locked my husband out

Comments

swervelol 28

Thursday 2 May 2019 18:44

How could a one year old reach the door lock?

carey33 15

Saturday 4 May 2019 16:17

My one year old pushed a laundry basket up to the door and locked my husband out

mekiswrite 21

Thursday 2 May 2019 20:06

Scared dad; smart kid.

StagGT 13

Thursday 2 May 2019 20:51

YDI, DHK

Keywords

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The Top

Today, on my way home from watching a movie with a girl, I began having an erection because I thought I could kiss her goodnight. She dropped me off at home, and with my full blown erection, I walked in front of her car with the headlights on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 433

You deserved it 46 505

Today, I arrived at a camp and met one of my roommates. At bedtime, I had energy still, so I did push-ups. The guy was asleep or so I thought because he was facing the wall. The guy thought I was jacking off and told everyone I did it in the middle of our room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 863

You deserved it 2 846

The Top

Today, my girlfriend works for a company that cleans VRBOs, so while she went to see family for a week, I asked her coworkers to come clean while she was gone, even the owner of the company showed up, They deep-cleaned house, but when she got home I got yelled at for a dirty coffee mug on my desk. The coffee was still warm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 087

You deserved it 118

Today, I attended a Buddhist prayer service for my religion and philosophy course. When the service was over, everyone stood up. Unfortunately, my legs and feet had fallen asleep so much that I lost balance and tackled a monk into the shrine. I'm expected to pay for injuries and damages. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 409

You deserved it 1 283

Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 565

You deserved it 4 684

Today, the guy I'm seeing told me, "I've always loved you as a person.... but not in any other way." While he was inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 063

You deserved it 1 095

Today, after I studied a lot of my time away and taking part in a test, my two friends got good grades, even though they didn't even study as much. Most of the time they did a lot of other stuff, and I don't know why my score isn't as good, and I'm not satisfied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 254

You deserved it 398

Today, I painfully watched my doctor burn a hole in my nail to drain the blood underneath. This is the prescribed treatment for the injury of hammering your thumb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 181

You deserved it 3 278