Health: Today, I now know why my next-door neighbour can't look me in...

By Username - 21/01/2011 03:55

Today, I now know why my next-door neighbour can't look me in the eye without smirking. He can hear every grunt, groan, fart and strain that happens in my bathroom from his bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 223

You deserved it 3 647

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Same thing different taste

Friends theme music plays

By Anonymous - 24/06/2020 05:01

Today, I realized that having the apartment bathroom next to my bedroom space isn't so great and convenient when it's occupied by my evil roommate, Fartzilla. I hear every constipated grunt, despite having music turned up. Worse, it's like living next to a poop-pourri factory. Nose bleach, anyone? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 413

You deserved it 201

The sound of silence

By hearing too much - 03/11/2019 02:00

Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 228

By monochrometea - 09/09/2011 02:07 - United States

Today, the only thing my downstairs neighbor wanted to talk about with me is how she can hear us go to the bathroom. She also claims that she can tell which one of us is going, based on the noise level. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 890

You deserved it 2 371

By silent one - 12/09/2011 05:30 - United States

Today, I had to stifle a fart so my upstairs neighbors wouldn't hear it. I know this because I frequently hear theirs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 276

You deserved it 3 029

By I hear everything... - 22/04/2017 18:00

Today, I can now identify which of my four roommates is using the washroom, based on their grunts. I just love having a bedroom beside the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 085

You deserved it 305

By op-poopy - 22/04/2011 14:26 - Canada

Today, the landlord of our building constructed a bathroom in the space under the stairs, outside my office, on the other side of a thin wall. He must have some kind of bowel disorder, because now I get to hear the sounds of his loud, wet and gassy pooping several times per day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 064

You deserved it 2 597

By edwinduarte1 - 13/09/2010 06:49 - France

Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 199

You deserved it 3 309

By Anon - 20/01/2017 22:00

Today, as any other work day, I sat down for lunch. Unfortunately, the door to the toilet is right next to where I sit. Every time a colleague uses the toilet, I hear everything, which puts me off my lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 119

You deserved it 1 733

By Anonymous - 01/07/2019 04:14

Today, I realised I can tell which family member has just left the bathroom from the smell alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 660

You deserved it 178

Cursed buildings

By investing in earplugs - 23/02/2022 05:59

Today, sick of the unfiltered noise we hear from our neighbours in our upstairs apartment, as we're above their fence line, we signed the lease on an apartment downstairs. While I was downstairs, my partner clomped upstairs, opened the bathroom door, and took a piss. I heard EVERYTHING. FML

I agree, your life sucks 778

You deserved it 330

krysxkatastrophe 14

Friday 21 January 2011 9:16

Smirk at him back! If he can hear you, you can hear him.

Waffcakes 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:04

you could always be like shut up! I know what you do in your bedroom... and walk away chuckling lol but thats creepy..

Comments

KiwiExchange 16

Friday 21 January 2011 9:20

HAHAH. Well, that sucks. You should smirk back just to creep him out and make him believe you can hear his business too:D!

emoooze 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:21

PERVY NEIGHBOUUUURo.o

_streets_ 19

Friday 21 January 2011 9:21

what the heck do you all do in there..

XxKyttixX 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:39

lol this made me laugh.

xxxJORDYBEARxxx 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:25

who cares, not a fml

nikki898 0

Friday 21 January 2011 19:11

r u stupid of course it's and fml it would be so embarrassing

DropDead77 11

Friday 21 January 2011 9:38

that's weird

Proudmary 2

Friday 21 January 2011 9:43

Ah man, it's the same in my building. Whenever I go to the bathroom I hear every single noise made in the bathrooms close to mine. Then again, I also hear my neighbour coughing. Keep waiting on him to die on me, the poor chap.

idk363 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:46

you should smirk right back at him

islandz 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:54

want som advice cover the opening at the bottom of the door with towel and turn on the water. it helps with noise reduction.

dezinspaaace 0

Friday 21 January 2011 11:08

LMFAO.

stevenmx86 7

Friday 21 January 2011 13:00

We had a bathroom like this in our first apartment.. I used to hear the neighbor pleasuring herself while I was using the restroom.. She wasn't even remotely attractive.. Fml