Animals: Today, I passed out in my kitchen and was woken up by my dog....

By mayhemily - 21/09/2015 16:22 - Canada - Aurora

Today, I passed out in my kitchen and was woken up by my dog. Not because she was worried about me, but because my body was blocking her food dish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 484

You deserved it 2 977

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 20/12/2012 19:50 - Spain - Santa Cruz De Tenerife

Today, I was woken up by my dog scratching at my door. After a while of this, I finally got up to let her in. When I opened the door, she looked at me, threw up, and scurried away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 996

You deserved it 9 670

By Anonymous - 20/03/2012 11:57 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, instead of waking up to soft sunlight creeping in the window or the gentle trill of birds, I was awakened by the sound of my dog vomiting all over my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 619

You deserved it 2 847

By WhyMe - 27/11/2018 17:30

Today, I woke up approximately half a nanosecond after my dog involuntarily vomited in bed. On my face. I opened my mouth because it literally filled my nose. I swallowed out of reflex before I was fully awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 481

You deserved it 314

Recipe for disaster

By ApparentlyATerribleDaughter - 12/08/2018 15:00

Today, while I took my dog out, my mother began to cook, took a Xanax, locked the doors, and passed out. When I managed to get in, I called the paramedics because she was in the smoke for at least an hour. When she became conscious, she blamed me for everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 399

You deserved it 209

By margretlle - 26/04/2009 04:07 - United States

Today, I was walking in the kitchen with my parrot on my shoulder and my dog running around. Something freaked out my bird and she bit my ear and started flapping her wings in my face. Surprised, I took a step back, tripped over my dog, fell, hit my head on the stove, and got knocked unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 743

You deserved it 8 415

By Anonymous - 27/08/2014 23:04 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 581

You deserved it 7 518

Kamikaze

By Hot Dog - 29/12/2022 09:00

Today, my dog was cold, so she kept sitting around the oven. When I opened it to put my pizza in, she hopped into it. The massive yelp of pain as she did so is going to haunt my dreams… and my financial stability. Even the vet has no idea how she's still alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 237

Splat!

By Anonymous - 11/05/2020 14:00

Today, I have a case of diarrhea. How did I find out? I got startled by my dog jumping up to greet me, and I shat all over the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 554

You deserved it 215

By Anonymous - 23/04/2011 05:11 - United States

Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After I'd called her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 102

You deserved it 4 176

Top of the mornin' to ya!

By Anonymous Taco Man - 03/08/2021 08:01 - United States

Today, my dog had REALLY bad diarrhea. I found that out when I woke up to find it all over my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 929

You deserved it 105

appygirlify 17

Monday 21 September 2015 22:32

hey, atleast your dog has priorities right?

zharks1010 18

Monday 21 September 2015 22:34

Obviously your dog can't understand that

Comments

appygirlify 17

Monday 21 September 2015 22:32

hey, atleast your dog has priorities right?

NakuEh 27

Monday 21 September 2015 22:34

My dog would have just walked over me and then went to sleep.

zharks1010 18

Monday 21 September 2015 22:34

Obviously your dog can't understand that

MossyMegaMan 20

Tuesday 22 September 2015 13:15

You would be surprised. Depending on breed, most dogs can easily tell when their owner is in danger or acting abnormally. And then they try to fix it.

Anti_Sora 31

Monday 21 September 2015 22:34

Sorry you passed out OP but dogs don't always understand the situation because some dogs just fall asleep in front of the food bowl.

imkool136 22

Monday 21 September 2015 22:35

Hope you're ok. I've passed out a few times too and it's a scary thing

amvoisard 7

Monday 21 September 2015 22:37

What a bitch. Get it?

MDoremis 38

Monday 21 September 2015 22:38

Priorities, man.

WitEluded 13

Monday 21 September 2015 22:39

Lassie only ran for help for Timmy because it was a television show and everything was staged. Don't count on an animal that eats it's on vomit to save your life in a time of crisis.

americanafrican 32

Monday 21 September 2015 22:44

lassie come home!

sturschaedel 27

Tuesday 22 September 2015 0:38

My childhood cat has saved my life once. And I saw a documentary once about how there are dogs especially trained to save the life of diabetics. Animals perceive things differently than us so the dog probably smelled that there was nothing seriously wrong with OP. But yeah, I wouldn't want to depend on an animal waking me in time.