Love: Today, I pointed out to my girlfriend that she wasn't jealous....

By Numou - 08/12/2008 07:26 - France

Today, I pointed out to my girlfriend that she wasn't jealous. She replied, "Well actually, I am, I just can't prove it cause no one else is interested in you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 942

You deserved it 4 252

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Same thing different taste

By Nox - 06/01/2010 07:25 - United States

Today, my girlfriend accused me of not having any friends. So I sent out a mass text saying "Hey, what's up?" to prove her wrong. I didn't get any replies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 585

You deserved it 7 701

By Anonymous - 21/08/2014 15:37 - United States

Today, I talked to a girl I like. I tried to make her jealous by telling her I had a "thing" going with another girl. She looked deeply into my eyes and said, "Wait, aren't you gay?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 200

You deserved it 17 873

By anonymous - 06/09/2016 03:05 - United States - Monroe

Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 343

You deserved it 2 236

Run for the hills

By Anonymous - 06/08/2021 08:00

Today, I realized that my girlfriend and I have no shared hobbies. We used to. She's stopped doing them with me and instead does them with someone else. No worries, he's "just a friend", although she did tell me she has a crush on him. But "nothing's going to happen" because "he doesn't feel the same". FML

I agree, your life sucks 948

You deserved it 99

By dinapar - 14/07/2009 14:02 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend watching a movie, my boyfriend then leans in and says: "You know, you're my favourite girlfriend." I then jokingly responded by saying: "You say that like I'm not the only girlfriend you have right now." I hate being right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 956

You deserved it 4 970

By kat - 21/02/2012 09:53 - Reserved

Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 728

You deserved it 3 059

By well then - 30/05/2015 05:40 - United States - Forest Park

Today, my girlfriend randomly confessed to basically having a "phobia" of monogamy. But don't worry, she defensively assured me she's never ever cheated on me, even though I never said she had, so I guess that's okay then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 793

You deserved it 2 465

Welcome back!

By Anonymous - 25/12/2013 23:19 - United States - Lebanon

Today, I realized my family is more excited to see my girlfriend than they are to see me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 655

You deserved it 4 273

By Leenotgay - 25/09/2011 04:23 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me that she's totally convinced I'm gay. When I tried explaining that I can't be if I'm attracted to her, she took it as me thinking she's mannish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 369

You deserved it 3 658

By a single fuck - 23/05/2013 16:40 - Germany - Berlin

Today, my girlfriend actually yelled, "Why are you making this all about YOU?!" after I confronted her over cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 084

You deserved it 3 105

hootch 0

Saturday 7 March 2009 18:13

She's interested! What more do you need?

HyperFlirt 0

Sunday 8 March 2009 5:35

Why do you need someone else to be interested in you?

Comments

yanarach 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 21:55

.......loooool. I love her, officially.

24788 6

Saturday 2 May 2009 11:25

lol, shouldn't ever put yourself in that situation.

redbluegreen 40

Friday 29 May 2009 3:14

If you love her, why do you need her to get all jealous if someone else is interested in you? You were asking for it.

dancergirl743 0

Friday 5 June 2009 2:22

What did you say after she said that

blahblahblah43 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 5:32

i can't believe she said tht!!!!

JordyRox 0

Monday 22 June 2009 6:36

OOOH Needa Go To Antarctica For That Burn

rachelley123 0

Sunday 8 August 2010 1:57

that's kinda mean she should of thought about how that would make you feel before she said it :( sorry op

hope143 0

Wednesday 25 August 2010 4:03

sounds like something I'd say! lol.

yelwarc 0

Saturday 9 October 2010 4:08

maybe go out side and ran, lift weights, join a club, or kill yourself those really are your only options

katiekay23 0

Tuesday 30 November 2010 22:22

damn that was a good burn....i like her

Keywords

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Today, my girlfriend, for our first time having sex, wanted to do stepbrother roleplay. Not only is that odd for our first time, it’s a weird fetish to have, especially when she actually does have a stepbrother. We ended up not finishing having sex, it was too weird for me FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 956

You deserved it 279

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 507

You deserved it 15 067

The Top

Today, I ran a mile for my gym class. While I managed to cut two minutes off my time, a few minutes later I felt dizzy and nauseous, which I thought was because I pushed myself too hard. I collapsed and vomited in front of everyone. Not a single person moved to help me. Not even the teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 427

You deserved it 214

Today, a man came up to me at the bus stop. He went into this long story about how his girlfriend is pregnant and they both haven't eaten in days. Trying to be tough and funny I said back, "sounds like you should invest in condoms instead of food." He responded by beating and robbing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 518

You deserved it 88 793

Today, my son learned that when you slide a mug across the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where you expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 505

You deserved it 3 423

Today, in the bathroom during the ACTs, my hair got stuck in the electric hand dryer. I had to rip my hair out. For future reference, hair + hand dryer = dreadlocks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 194

You deserved it 12 662

Today, I arrived at work, only to be arrested and accused of stealing over $8000 from my job. Five hours later at the police station, the discovery was made that the actual thief had an employee ID one digit different than mine. He works at another location over 1200 miles away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 333

You deserved it 2 768

Today, at work I wrote up my boyfriend (whom I've been secretly dating, because I'm his supervisor) for being $40 short on his register. Our policy is to write up anyone short over $10. He got mad and told my boss we're dating, and I was instantly fired. Then I got dumped for being a "tattle-tale". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 919

You deserved it 18 220

Same thing different taste

Run for the hills

Welcome back!

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