Miscellaneous: Today, I realised what kind of man I married when I finally shelved... - FML

By Anonymous - 21/01/2016 13:40 - Belgium - Ieper

Today, I realised what kind of man I married when I finally shelved his book, "Getting Things Done", still untouched 3 months after buying it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 409

You deserved it 2 674

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Same old story

By Anonymous - 07/10/2021 02:00

Today, after 8 years and a house bought together, I realised I regret getting married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 848

You deserved it 527

By divorce? i think so - 21/07/2012 02:12 - Canada - Markham

Today, I found my husband's journal, and along with it the real reason he took so long to show up to our wedding rehearsals last year. According to the journal, it was because he was too busy wooing a married mother of five and sticking his "slut-banger all up in that fat booty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 296

You deserved it 3 313

By smashleighfig - 08/03/2010 05:14 - France

Today, I found out my husband of 10 years has a online blog. Excited to read about myself, I began skimming, only to find out that every entry is him explaining how he let his "soulmate" walk away 9 years ago because of his "previous commitment" and how he regrets it every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 110

You deserved it 3 629

Take the L

By Anonymous - 08/01/2016 17:38 - Canada - Newmarket

Today, I now accept how stupid I was to marry a man whose plans for the future all start with, "When I win the lottery…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 566

You deserved it 9 681

Just once

By Anonymous - 19/02/2020 20:00

Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 973

You deserved it 200

Fall of Man

By Anonymous - 25/07/2022 15:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my husband moved out while I was out of town. The only thing of his he left behind was a copy of Paradise Lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 917

You deserved it 144

By S. Tucker - 07/06/2011 09:28 - United States

Today, I learned how unhappy my husband is in our marriage. Apparently he also can't find a good woman. We didn't have a heart-to-heart, I read his woes in a blog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 830

You deserved it 3 615

By 3yrneveragainn - 31/12/2010 00:45

Today, I figured out why the man I've been seeing for 3 years hasn't asked for my hand in marriage. His current wife called me and told me all about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 081

You deserved it 4 124

Bizarre love triangle

By sunburychick - 13/09/2009 09:27 - Australia

Today, I realised that the man who I wanted to be with, the man who wanted to be with me, and my husband were three different people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 848

You deserved it 26 148

Hindrance

By Anonymous - 18/08/2022 06:00

Today, I haven’t spoken to my husband in a week, and when I finally spoke to him he thanked me because he’s gotten so much work done round the house, caught up on all his paperwork for his job, and reconnected with his Xbox friends. I didn’t realise I was such a fucking distraction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 1 584

Next

Top comments

muncherofice 19

Friday 22 January 2016 1:45

You appeared to have married a man

gatorclay97 28

Friday 22 January 2016 1:26

Bill gates once said he will only hire lazy people, so maybe he'll end up making a lot of money?

Comments

UnluckyGeek 10

Friday 22 January 2016 1:53

Does he listen to Hello Internet by any chance?

anonymous7372628 3

Friday 22 January 2016 2:48

Plot twist: op is Mrs. Haran

fordneagles 34

Friday 22 January 2016 5:48

Mrs. Numberphile, you mean :P

crandel 11

Friday 22 January 2016 1:56

Did you buy him the book? It's really better he doesn't read it anyway, because it'll just take time away from when he could be getting things done. Just a form of procrastination really.

johncanact 13

Friday 22 January 2016 2:05

So you judge people based off of what books they have or have not read? Poor guy

Mike_Oxhard 14

Friday 22 January 2016 2:05

I can't really give you any sympathy since it was your decision to marry him. Typically people get to know one another before marriage. Few exceptions exist depending on your religious beliefs.

TheCutestLizard 28

Friday 22 January 2016 2:08

It's the thought that counts?

LadyLenore 14

Friday 22 January 2016 16:46

He got it, because he knows he's a procrastinator... Though the irony seems to be lost on him, that he went to the trouble of buying it, but do nothing with it.

swimthenread27 19

Friday 22 January 2016 2:15

I don't get what the big deal is. A lot of people are/get lazy. And you had to know what kind of person he was before you married him..

Sathane 21

Friday 22 January 2016 2:24

Maybe he was too busy getting things done instead of reading a book about how to get things done.

FSGInsainity 15

Friday 22 January 2016 2:26

At least he managed to buy the book? I wouldn't have even reached that point.

aeryn97 17

Friday 22 January 2016 2:43

I've married his twin apparently! :p

emenesso 13

Friday 22 January 2016 4:01

I don't really see the "FML" part of this... I've got heaps of books that I've bought and they are still in my queue of books to read, since I don't get a lot of time to read (mainly on my breaks at work). I can see the irony, but I don't think it's really an FML situation.

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Neighbours Lonely Halloween Wanker Jealousy Love Party Fight Family Argument Animals Cats Parents Sports Health Embarrassing Shopping Medication Birds Anger issues Weddings Pranks TikTok YouTube Dogs Cute Work AITA

The Top

Today, I was walking down the street when I passed a construction site. All of the workers started making a fuss and whistling, etc. Naturally, I got very flustered. I stood still for a second and faced them. One yelled for me to move because I was in the way of a girl at a stop light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 007

You deserved it 14 245

Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 139

You deserved it 28 443

The Top

Today, a really drunk couple staggered into the store I work at. One of them yelled at me, "Hey you! Kid! Tell us where the booze is at!" This would have been funny if these people weren't my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 846

You deserved it 2 728

Today, I arrived at work and was immediately given a disciplinary write-up for being two hours late for my shift. Apparently the manager had changed my schedule that morning and failed to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 343

You deserved it 2 074

Today, I paid 100$ for a trash service to pick up my broken couch. Minutes later, I got an email from someone finally replying to my ad for a free couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 529

You deserved it 201

Today, a creepy girl from my class wouldn't stop texting me and trying to call me. In order to get her to stop, I texted back saying that I was at my mom's house for a family dinner. She replied, "No you're not. I can see you right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 481

You deserved it 4 355

Today, I found out that when my friends say they're too busy to hang out with me, what they really mean is that they're going to have an awesome pool party, and don't want me to come. The Instagram stories say it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 904

You deserved it 191

Today, while I was driving, a pedestrian gesticulated wildly at me for being on my phone. I was just tucking my hair behind my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 73