Intimacy: Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would...

By IbetIgotAIDS - 12/09/2011 16:15 - United States

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95 791

You deserved it 15 281

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Same thing different taste

By ekaay - 16/01/2018 15:00

Today, whilst cleaning the living room, I heard snickering coming from my bedroom. My two nephews had found my "play cupboard" and were blowing up condoms like balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 049

You deserved it 1 004

By frustrated - 17/08/2013 22:56 - Ireland - Killarney

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 146

You deserved it 7 411

By the_lonely_life - 27/06/2013 01:02 - United States

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 166

You deserved it 7 048

By kahemae44 - 27/10/2009 10:20 - United States

Today, I visited my boyfriend's house excited about the romantic night he promised me. As time passed, we started making out and heading up to his room. Rose petals and candles filled his room. "How romantic", I thought. That is, until we saw his 5 year old sister blowing up condom balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 418

You deserved it 5 563

TMI FML

By eugh - 07/05/2021 14:01 - United States - Midlothian

Today, I discovered the brand of condoms my parents use. It was in the same grocery bag as my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 576

By Anonymous - 13/02/2014 15:47 - United States - Kennett

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 517

You deserved it 53 110

By ADickySituation - 05/05/2013 04:14 - United States - Wilmette

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 876

You deserved it 4 938

Gross

By Anonymous - 02/03/2017 17:00 - Canada - Elora

Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 543

You deserved it 1 617

They grow up so fast these days…

By Anonymous - 11/07/2022 06:00

Today, my 5 year-old and I walked in on a girl giving her boyfriend a blow job in the washroom at the playground. Last week we found a crack pipe on the picnic table. So many conversations I wish we could have waited for… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 257

You deserved it 166

By myself - 20/09/2012 07:00 - United States - Seaside

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 460

You deserved it 31 247

omegaxen 0

Monday 12 September 2011 22:57

That blows!

Hockey_fan 0

Monday 12 September 2011 23:00

Well that really sucks" That really "Dampened" your spirits That "blows" Well..we all seen it "Coming" ...I'm sorry

Comments

Nekro_kat 1

Monday 12 September 2011 23:02

Eeew! That blows! Lol FYL

alstbv12 13

Monday 12 September 2011 23:02

At least you weren't eating soggy waffles.

ariannaa_fml 17

Monday 12 September 2011 23:18

Or blue waffles...

GabbyCharityM 0

Monday 12 September 2011 23:41

Or soggy blue waffles..

fightingkittens 39

Thursday 13 October 2011 9:38

Or soggy blue cheese waffles.....

xiaoxaio 5

Wednesday 14 December 2011 15:31

hahah the 1st time was funny second was kind funny 3rd was still past the funny line but by the 4th time it got old

flamerocker 9

Monday 12 September 2011 23:03

That makes two of us!

Mitch_Connor 11

Monday 12 September 2011 23:03

Looks like you two were used to sticky situations.

NeatNit 32

Monday 12 September 2011 23:04

You have horrible parents.

ZenaaGee 0

Monday 12 September 2011 23:06

Ewww

Blue87 4

Monday 12 September 2011 23:06

Ewww grosss

eurekaroy 6

Monday 12 September 2011 23:07

Lmfao I almost peed on myself reading this :)

GabbyCharityM 0

Monday 12 September 2011 23:07

Snake balloon animals. Sounds legit.

Bunnehs 0

Monday 12 September 2011 23:08

But you found this out by being a client, probably..

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Bosses Capitalism Work Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, I was been accused of stealing lunches from the fridge at work. I’m a huge germaphobe and would NEVER eat someone else’s food, but because I’m the fattest one in the office, everyone automatically blamed me. Hashtag fatgirlproblems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 552

You deserved it 152

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 090

You deserved it 13 428

The Top

Today, the really hot guy that works in the same building as me came to work after being away for the past two days. I said, "Look who finally decided to come to work!" His response was, "I had a death in the family, thanks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 630

You deserved it 27 420

Today, my partner and I got called out to a domestic disturbance. Things turned ugly while we were en-route. Long story short, I now know how many grown men it takes to lift a nearly 400lb shit-covered woman onto a stretcher. I almost reconsidered my choice of career. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 913

You deserved it 1 759

Today, I, a man in his 40s, had to be taken to the hospital because I was laughing so hard at an old Disney movie that my diaphragm went into spasms. I stopped breathing and passed out for a few minutes, and my son had to call an ambulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 016

You deserved it 434

Today, I found out I had three strands of pubic hair beside my nipple, so I decided to cut it off with a scissor since I'm going swimming tomorrow. In an attempt to cut off my third strand, I instead excised the cap of my left nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 1 188

Today, my dad joked he’d have to fight my boyfriend to find out if he’s worthy. My boyfriend grew up abused by his dad and older brothers, and has a powerful instinct to fight back. My dad is now out cold on the floor and my boyfriend is in the corner rocking back and forth and crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 258

You deserved it 170

Today, my son told me that he doesn't need to go to school because he doesn't need a job. It turns out he plans to get a life sentence in prison and live the rest of his life at the taxpayers' expense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 310

You deserved it 3 785

Same thing different taste

TMI FML

Gross

They grow up so fast these days…

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