Miscellaneous: Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was...

By Grandson - 01/01/2012 13:51 - Australia

Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 877

You deserved it 2 745

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Same thing different taste

By Michelle - 01/09/2010 08:27 - Netherlands

Today, I went to pay my grandma a visit. She called the cops because she didn't recognize me and thought I was a robber. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 993

You deserved it 3 471

By tkoester - 29/08/2015 04:29 - United States - Fairfield

Today, I got a phone call letting me know my grandmother was arrested for trying to light my grandpa on fire. She's now in jail, asking for bail money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 996

You deserved it 1 570

By Anonymous - 31/05/2014 20:04 - United States - Brandon

Today, I spent several hours downtown with my violent grandma, after she was arrested for threatening a guy with a gun. His crime? "Trespassing" by ringing the doorbell and asking if she was interested in donating to charity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 895

You deserved it 3 887

Who are you?

By forgotten - 02/10/2009 07:46 - United Kingdom

Today, being the nice grandchild that I am, I went to visit my grandmother. She didn't recognise who I was. I thought she was joking. She later called the police as, "Some weirdo had walked into her house." I'm that weirdo; she wasn't joking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 511

You deserved it 2 849

By nyebust - 01/01/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 215

You deserved it 8 144

By badgrandchild - 16/03/2009 21:01 - United States

Today, my phone rang while I was home alone. When I picked up, all I could hear was heavy breathing. Convinced it was one of my friends playing a joke, I said loudly, "Get off the phone, you fucker, and don't call back!" It turned out it was my grandma. She had been having a stroke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 616

You deserved it 92 131

Framed

By Anonymous - 28/09/2019 04:00

Today, the police turned up. It turns out the girl I slept with two nights ago was burgled. She told my great aunt, who happens to live next door to her. They then told my grandparents, who then told my mum. I'm now a suspect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 717

You deserved it 176

By newniece - 27/01/2010 00:09 - United States

Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 988

You deserved it 2 562

By Paul - 08/08/2011 01:49 - United States

Today, some cops came to my house saying that the neighbors thought the party I was having was too loud and obnoxious. It was my grandmother's 86 birthday party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 437

You deserved it 2 927

By Anonymous - 01/08/2015 03:39 - United States - Pasadena

Today, I was on the phone with my senile grandma, when I told her I had to go because I had an appointment at the clinic. For some reason, she assumed I was talking about an abortion clinic, and started raging at me and calling me a murderer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 502

You deserved it 1 924

jemmers 13

Sunday 1 January 2012 19:03

Go grandma! At least she had fun.

kjcamaro3 5

Sunday 1 January 2012 19:03

Come on granny....roll those hooters back up!

Comments

Slatka000 2

Monday 2 January 2012 1:27

tell grandma she is invited to my next party :) <3

pslcdsl 9

Monday 2 January 2012 2:51

Let her have fun while it lasts!

amberitaa 5

Monday 2 January 2012 4:54

Grandma got run over by a reindeer, while flashing the whole town on Christmas Eve....

crazyrunnergirl 7

Monday 2 January 2012 5:19

Shes just reliving the glory days

MR_RODSQUAD 11

Monday 2 January 2012 6:18

New Year Streaking? That's new.

Jibblets2367 7

Monday 2 January 2012 7:00

Granny **** ftw!!

jordanluvsgreenz 0

Monday 2 January 2012 7:16

Grandma knows best ;)

Sdyney6 0

Monday 2 January 2012 7:21

Nip slip maybe?

Sdyney6 0

Monday 2 January 2012 7:23

Nip slip maybe?

nvo 6

Monday 2 January 2012 7:25

Hope granny didn't catch a cold. Make sure she doesn't get bored at your family's gatherings again...

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Today, I found one of those realistic, expensive sex dolls in my boyfriend's cupboard. I asked why on earth he had that and apparently it’s for all those filthy, violent sexual things he likes to do, but knows most women would never even agree to try. Um, WHAT? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 248

You deserved it 529

Today, I've spent nearly three weeks indulging my boyfriend's weird fetish, where he wears a hockey mask and I call him Jason. He just confessed it isn't really a fetish for him and that was just fucking with me. He's already told all his friends. I'm humiliated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 245

You deserved it 4 765

The Top

Today, I was talking with my mother and expressed my slight disappointment at how many of my friends are getting into relationships, whereas I'm still single. My mother decided to encourage me by saying "Don't worry, sweetie. There are boys out there who don't go for looks. You'll be fine". FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 190

You deserved it 4 023

Today, we got my brother a pet hamster because he has trouble making friends. We thought a hamster would be a good way to teach him about caring for others. I walked into the room and the hamster was hanging from the ceiling. Turns out there's a reason my brother doesn't have friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 114

You deserved it 5 435

Today, I've told my boyfriend several times that my toothless grandma can only eat pureed foods, but likes any kind of soup, "as long as there's no meat in it." Guess what was his idea of a gift for her when meeting her for the first time? A steak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 476

You deserved it 183

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I play video games. No, not that I play too many video games or have an addiction to video games. Just that I play them, period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 709

You deserved it 357

Today, while on a first date, I leaned in to kiss her, but my lips somehow brushed against her nose instead. I panicked and ended up kissing her forehead like a grandma saying goodbye to a child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151

You deserved it 321

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 703

You deserved it 5 586

Same thing different taste

Who are you?

Framed

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