i couldnt agree with u anymore. I duno im goin through some shit rite now too, i guess it may be depression. I spoke about it to my mom and she just slipped by it and was ya ok rite u through depression. she doesnt believe me no one rlly does so i keep it with me. life sucks rite now, i think it would have been better if i rlly wanst alive or never was born i duno. if u some tips and some tiem to takl to me maybe u can help me. thx babe :)

JustSoLost: I wish I had a way to talk to you without giving out my e-mail on FML, but there's not, so I'll just write you a reply here. I was depressed for ages, and honestly the way I got through it was with having just one friend to talk to. I met her through a friend through a friend through a friend and haven't met her in person because she lives far away. Talking to her really helped because it felt so safe to talk to her. She didn't know any of my current friends so it didn't matter if she told anyone that I was having a really hard time. My parents ignored me and disliked me, and my friends sort of brushed it off, the only one who really noticed was my best friend who deemed me 'little black cloud'. I didn't feel like I had any right to feel depressed because my life is great. I have everything anyone could ask for and more, but for some reason I was still so sad every day. Talk to someone, because there is always someone who will listen; even if it's a random girl who leaves too long comments on FML, or a friend of a friend of a friend who has a kind heart. I bet if you really talk with your friends, though they might not understand how you're feeling, they will probably listen. No matter how hard things get, don't lose your head. The thought that life would be easier for anyone if you were dead is just plain illogical. Any parent would feel an endless pain if they lost a child. Not to mention your friends would never likely be the same, even if they don't understand the way you feel. The death of someone could change countless lives. You have an impact on more people than you can even know. Suicide isn't the only way to lose your head. Cutting, though deemed as attention-seeking behavior, didn't start that way. Don't get caught up in that mess. Hurting yourself will give you nothing but more scars to hide every time you go to the beach or wear clothes that don't cover them. Everyone knows what they are, and they're shameful. I don't think anyone wears those scars with pride. The emotional scars of depression are deep enough, why add more? Other than talking to my friend, another thing that helps me a lot is when I am really down, I take a shower. It helps in many ways. Water is naturally calming for most people because we spend the first nine months of our life submerged in liquid. Also, it gives you time for yourself. No phone in the shower, no computer, no mother nagging or siblings fighting, friends calling, no homework or studying. It's just you and the water. Time to clear your head, and if need be, a place to let it all out without being disturbed. Don't focus on the bad things during the day. When you feel crappy, life falls into the 90/10 rule, where though only 10% of your day is bad, it's all you can see. Rather than remembering that your car didn't start on the first try, focus on where it took you- the mall, your friend's house. Rather than remember that You got woken up too early, remember that you have more time of daylight. Catch my drift? Sometimes, none of this helps, sometimes a doctor can. If you're in school, they also have counselors for free. As a last note, things get better. Even my psychology book says so :). You may not see an end to the sadness, but there is one. With time, I got better. Things won't be awful forever. Hope I have helped you, if even just by letting you know you're not alone.

To GabriLee From JustSoLost Thank you so much. You did help deffinately i'm happy there is someone who would actualy reach out and help a little. I rlly dont speak out bout this btu i do think im depressed. I dunno if i wanan be a burden upon my friends if i talk to them bout this. ANd lately just everyoen is so busy. My parents wont ever understand, they anrt from here. I dunno why i feel liek this. Maybe cuz of my family. My parents would have divorced if i wasnt born, which i wish i wasnt. we go through so much shit especailly my mother. My dad well, hes awesome and fabulous but he has his reallly bad side (if u no what i mean). My family isnt rlly a big fan of me. Since im rllly meann and hard with them cuz i cant stand them. I talk back alot and my parnets hate me for it and i cuss back. I love my mom soo much altho some stuff she says hurts my terribly, she loves me the most since im the oldest and her first child and she stayed with my dad because of me. At times i hate my dad for whats hes done . At times everyone hates me, and i just dont wanan be around. i wuldnt ever cut myself, im not a big fan of blood and scars(lol :P). But i dunno if i would ever kill myself i dont think its appropriate but stil... i dunno i know i need help, but how do i speak to someone tht wont talk to my parents bout it. I dont want anyoen to rlly know since I'm a "nerd" LOL im a perfectionist and im grt in skool( BTW im a teenager ) LOl im not rllly a nerd nerd but im an honour student and get straight A's i dunno if someone liek me shoudl be goin through this. im not an emo too LOL ( never said tht u did call me just puttin it out therelol ) but yh i dunno Thank you SOO MUCH You've been a pleasure to talk to and i hope we can continue to talk for a while

JustSoLost is the definition of an emofag, and just thinks they're depressed because they've had a bad week. Just.. Shut up. Your spelling failure and run-on sentences are making ME "depressed."

HEY MOTHER ******* ASSHOLE who are u to call me an emo. Why dont u **** off and dont comment on ppl when u dont even no what ur talkin bout son a bitch. **** off

Oh shut the **** you JustSoLost, you are a stupid emo bitch. Omfg, you're such a ****** and your comments just emit faggotry x10. I find murderoticadam to be one sexy man and he says some pretty sexy things (:

You haven't a clue what you're talking about either. You're an early teen whining about being alive. Emofag.

drkwlf and murderoticadam you two honestly think before u say stuff ur very iggnorant and stupid. you have no lifes but juts comment away since u have nothin else to do. this is the last time im gonna respond to u ppl or anyone liek u ppl. U hve no respect for ppl. Go educate urself and get a life :)

I know what you mean about not really wanting to talk about it. I felt like I didn't have a right to be sad because there was nothing seriously wrong with my life. a lot of the problems came from me being depressed, actually. The thing that kicked it off for you seems to be your home life, and I can't blame you, it seems like a struggle. I know what it's like to feel like your parents aren't there for you the way they should be. Your parents' problems are not yours. divorce and foul marriages are really hard on everyone involved, and it's unfortunate that you are affected by it so badly. I went through a lot of the same feelings when it comes to my parents. While I was at my worst, they could tell I was upset. My mom didn't care. She didn't like me at all. I knew she loved me, but not like, and that's what I really wanted. My dad cared, but I couldn't talk to him, so it just made him angry. My parents would yell at me because they were frustrated with me, and I would yell back because I was mad that they were taking it out on me, so they would yell because they were mad I was taking it out on them. It was a vicious circle. As hard as it is, you need to try and stop the circle, because who knows if your parents will. If your parents yell, don't yell back. If you stop the crossfire, maybe it will end on their end too. If things calm down at home, maybe slowly but surely you'll feel better. Feeling better has a way of fixing everything. My parents like me now, even my mom. You shouldn't feel like you're being a burden on your friends by opening up. I felt the same way. I didn't want to tell them what I was going through because I thought they would never understand, mostly because I didn't really understand. After things got better, I talked to my friend, one who barely even noticed anything was wrong for over a year, and she's told me time and again that she feels guilty for not noticing. She wishes I had talked to her. Even if a friend doesn't understand, it doesn't mean they don't care. Your life wouldn't be a burden on them, but relieve the burden of watching a friend suffer. I know that when my friend, who has gone through so much in her life, calls me upset, I would help her a million times if it meant making her better even for the night. Countless times I have gotten out of bed in the middle of the night to comfort her for a few hours and to help her through. I don't regret being the person she can count on, rather I am happy to know she has someone she knows cares. Even if you have just one friend you can go to. I wish I had spoken to you under different circumstances because there are ways to help but precautions of being on the internet make it hard. I also understand not wanting people to know. I was in your shoes: an honor student and good grades and whatnot, and no one noticed what was going on, not even some of my best friends. Not everyone has to know, though. Not even my best friend knows everything about what was going on, because I never mentioned it until after things were getting better. If you talk to one person you trust to keep it a secret, it could help infinitely. I feel the need to stress- death is irreversible. Every day, people die too young and everyone says how unfair it is that they don't get to live their life, don't even consider adding yourself to that list, because you DO get the chance to live. There is an end to the sadness, and it doesn't end in death. It's a wonderful feeling, the first day you can get up and be happy to do so. You won't be in your parents' house forever, so don't consider your whole life worthless when your whole life is still ahead of you! Life begins when you're out of your parents' house. Not just for you but for everyone! Don't let depression decide who you are. You don't want to be remembered as the girl who ended her life before she even let it begin. You were born for a reason. It's silly to think the reason you've lived this long is only to die.

Why don't you go abort your life if you're going to write dumbshit stuff like that. Btw you're also a ****.

To GabriLee Thank You very much. Your an awesome person for just takin the time to just talk to me. I appreciate it. I'll take your advise and just find one friend to talk to. What I'm goin through isnt anythign knew, just within the last year its gotten rlly bad. But ive been struggling for a very long time since i was in kindergardin. God Bless you for helping me. I hope ur not offended with "may god bless you". im happy tht u recovered and may u live a full and happy life. Thank You very much. srry to bother you :) thanx love

drkwlf and murderoticadam No one is forcing you to read these comments. You need to grow up, and quickly. Weren't you ever taught that if you have nothing nice to say, then don't say it at all? Emo is not a state of being, as I said before, it is a fashion statement. It's not cute or funny or attractive to come onto FML and bash the people on there for everything they do and are. Foul language does not make you cool, and childish taunts make you sound endlessly ignorant. If you have never felt depression then you have no right to even place a comment on this FML because there is no possible way to understand it. Even more specifically, the comments made by JustSoLost and myself have nothing to do with you, so there is nothing to validate your comments in reply to ours. If you insist on being inappropriate and rude, don't be such a coward and do it to someone's face so they have the opportunity to hit you. It doesn't take much of a gut to insult someone they'll never meet face to face. You have no right to judge anyone's life but your own.

JustSoLost- I'm not offended at all. God's blessings also play a big part in me getting better, and I can only hope the same for you. Reply to any of my comments if you need anything (even if the comment you leave me has nothing to do with the FML I commented on :P) I check comments until the FML has been moved to page three :D Best wishes!

Thank You! And I will keep in contact. :) Thank You again

Well it's kinda hard to do it to someones face when the issue is raised on FML, but i'm just voicing my opinion - but considering I think JustSoLost is a barely teenage retard with a terrible grasp of both spelling and grammar, yet apparently gets straight A's, I can't help but call bullshit on the whole thing. And yes I was taught that, but if I followed it I wouldn't have a damn thing to say on this FML.. Apart from words of support for my fellow assholes. Did your mother tell you that eating carrots made you see in the dark? You don't have to so everything your mother taught you once you become an adult. Before we jump in with a comment on my upbringing.. I was raised very well by a very moral and compassionate family. I guess some people are just bad eggs.. And proud of it.

'Hollister douches' What the **** are you? Are you a 12 year old? You sure are acting like one. Oh that's right, everyone who says emos are retarded or anyone who makes fun of someone must wear hollister. I assume you're trying to say that they're all 'preppy'. Grow the **** up. Sorry that your parents are poor and that you have no friends and so have to call everyone else names :(

Who the **** are u to judge some like tht u asshole. go get a ******* life. Dont commment if ur gonna so flippin rude asshole

!83, are you talking about me, or the douche who commented about my post?

the douche tht commented on your post

Kay. I'm sorry to hear what you've been through dude, hope shit gets better.

thanx babe

you bitch! what if she read that and really DID kill herself?! you would be a ******* murderer!

Actually, he's simply encouraging a donation of oxygen that is wasted on the OP.

Actually, if someone on this thread should kill themselves, it'd be you.

Congratulations #156, you're a horrible excuse for a human being! What do you plan to do with your life now?