Holidays: Today, I returned home from a three-week vacation. None of my... - FML

By 88_OP - 25/07/2011 02:34 - United Kingdom

Today, I returned home from a three-week vacation. None of my friends realized I'd been gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 468

You deserved it 3 963

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 05/09/2014 18:54 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I just got back from a two week vacation. I live with six people and only the dog was happy to see me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 998

You deserved it 3 593

By Anonymous - 03/06/2018 01:30

Today, my mother knocked on the door of my room at 7am. I am currently over 300 miles from home, on a vacation to get away from my overbearing family. I told none of them where I was going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 961

You deserved it 457

By supercharged - 05/04/2015 18:03 - Canada - Sherwood Park

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation where I had no internet whatsoever. I turned on my phone to get notifications, hoping to see a message or two that I'd missed while gone. There was 1 notification, telling me how many FMLs were posted while I was away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 172

You deserved it 3 348

By Lonely626 - 16/06/2016 22:26

Today, while talking with a coworker, we discussed a weekend home invasion scenario. It was then that I realized my social circle is so non-existent, that my job would notice I'm gone before my friends would. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 939

You deserved it 1 259

By carr - 04/03/2011 16:25 - France

Today, my mother noticed that I hadn't taken the trash out in a few weeks and angry, piled various full trash bags on my bed. I've been away on holiday for the past three weeks, I guess she didn't notice that part. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 994

You deserved it 3 554

Wish you were here

By taylor124 - 22/08/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, I listened to a voicemail from my mom about how she misses me and can't wait to see me when I get back from vacation. Thinking she hung up, my mother then had a conversation with my aunt about how quiet the house is without me and how she'd be blessed if I didn't come home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 092

You deserved it 2 879

Left out

By Anonymous - 12/06/2009 01:15 - Canada

Today, I saw some friends' cars at a friend's house, but thought nothing about it. Then I found pictures on Facebook of the pool party they had as a going away party for my friend, who is leaving the country for three months. I had no idea my friend was leaving, and I was the only one not invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 555

You deserved it 5 260

By Fuckup - 05/08/2013 18:09 - United States - Naples

Today, I returned to work after a much-needed vacation. I got a lot of weird stares from my co-workers, and my boss eventually came over and told me to go home. Why? My work week starts tomorrow, not today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 978

You deserved it 10 576

By Anonymous - 01/09/2013 23:55 - United States

Today, while on vacation, I called my home phone to check the messages. Someone answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 181

You deserved it 2 821

Tight knit family

By Anonymous - 24/05/2010 17:12 - Canada

Today, I went to visit my parents after 4 years of not seeing them. They'd moved without telling me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 791

You deserved it 19 608

Next

Top comments

takanuva0123 0

Monday 25 July 2011 8:39

You call those people friends?

hannahrawrr 0

Monday 25 July 2011 8:39

Some friends you got there.

Comments

Playful1985 9

Monday 25 July 2011 17:38

usually that happens when you travel a lot or don't keep in contact with people. I think my obsession with twitter started with a desire for people to know where I was if I went missing.

angelr00lz 3

Monday 25 July 2011 17:38

Story of my life.

dogpup4 23

Monday 25 July 2011 18:06

Things like this make me wonder why you didn't bother telling them you were going somewhere in the first place.

kaylapple 1

Monday 25 July 2011 18:06

get some new friends.

mizariXmoon 0

Monday 25 July 2011 18:50

it's sad to say that I know how you feel

this_effen_guy 1

Monday 25 July 2011 19:24

lol that's funny

okevin 0

Monday 25 July 2011 20:03

same thing happend to me :(

hoonyer 17

Monday 25 July 2011 21:09

Same her :'( this is what u do . . . (Q';')=0 (x_X)

IrishBoy508 1

Monday 25 July 2011 21:48

Maybey your dilusional and those friends of yours don't exsist and there in your head......wait if they were in your head they whould have noticed so nevermind theyre real

xbarbiexdollx20 5

Monday 25 July 2011 23:16

Some "friends" you got there, huh?

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The Top

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 487

You deserved it 38 933

Today, my son is so naive that he didn’t notice that a company he interviewed for basically used him as free labour during a 3 day “skills assessment period”, after which he didn’t even get the job. Even after I explained to him they'd used him for 3 days free grunt work, he still didn’t understand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 430

You deserved it 118

The Top

Today, driving out of my neighbourhood, I encountered three snow plows heading towards me. I tried to turn around in a stranger's driveway but wasn't fast enough, and they left a wall 4-feet high of ice and snow, blocking me in. I rang the doorbell, borrowed their shovel and dug out their driveway. Its -32 with wind-chill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 144

Today, I tried to tease my boyfriend by pulling my skirt up, bending over, and backing up into him. He gagged and said, "Please, wash your ass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 137

You deserved it 802

Today, I caught my sister using my shaver to trim her pubic hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 986

You deserved it 128

Today, management told me that I couldn't have a doorbell on my door. How did they get my attention to tell me this? By ringing my doorbell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 416

You deserved it 3 239

Today, I was having amazing sex with this guy I had been seeing for a while. It got really intense, so did my moans. Guys usually like when I moan, but he just put his hands over my mouth and told me to "shut up" because it sounded like "pig noises". FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 322

You deserved it 21 500

Today, I've had to accept that, despite my efforts to stay in touch with the few friends I made at college, I have zero friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 91