Work: Today, I sat down on a chair after my very large boss sat on... - FML

By Anonymous - 18/05/2012 11:49 - United States

Today, I sat down on a chair after my very large boss sat on it all day. When I got up, my pants were damp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 059

You deserved it 2 752

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Same thing different taste

Soaked

By Anonymous - 08/06/2024 22:00 - Australia - Wacol

Today, I got into my car to go to work and discovered that my seat, seat-belt, door, and all the electronics in the door were wet. Apparently I hadn't wound the window all the way up, and it rained last night. I'm now sitting at my desk typing this with a wet bum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 387

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 028

You deserved it 2 795

By helpme - 04/12/2013 04:05 - United States - Brockton

Today, I got a new chair at work. After spending 3 hours putting it together, I was called into my boss's office and let go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 577

You deserved it 5 731

By shart - 09/03/2016 02:48 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I had an accident at work. Not the kind involving worker's compensation. The kind involving desperately scrubbing my office chair with paper towels, before going home to change my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 549

You deserved it 2 289

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 957

You deserved it 3 814

By badbowel - 31/01/2018 13:00 - United States - Utica

Today, I was sick from both ends at work. My boss wouldn't let me go home, and told me to borrow a pair of spare pants to change into. I suffered another bout of gastroenteritis and shit someone else's pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 872

You deserved it 299

By kbartlett86 - 24/06/2010 20:02 - Canada

Today, after sitting for hours at my desk, my legs fell asleep. When I got up to go to the bathroom on my break, I couldn't walk properly and leaned against things so I wouldn't fall over. My supervisor then came over and started lecturing me about being drunk at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 530

You deserved it 4 618

It's not what you think!

By HenryJ - 22/11/2024 22:00 - Australia

Today, I spilled water on the front of my pants right before a meeting so I tried drying them with the hand dryer in the bathroom. A coworker walked in just as I was awkwardly squatting in front of the machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 93

By Username - 21/03/2012 17:10 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my boss recognized my shoes under the stall wall and had a conversation with me while we were both taking a dump. I had severe diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 412

You deserved it 2 343

By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 13:31 - United States

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 334

You deserved it 1 827

Next

Top comments

KeannaLove 32

Friday 18 May 2012 16:28

He was just marking his territory.

hapetreefriend 1

Friday 18 May 2012 16:28

Ewwwww

Comments

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 18 May 2012 20:25

A faint taste in the back of your throat? Erm... Pavlovian arousal sensation?

EmptyTankOfLuck 0

Friday 18 May 2012 21:21

This reminded me of jackass 3, when Steve-O drinks Prestons Sweat

ddrocker23_fml 0

Friday 18 May 2012 21:46

bring an extra pair of pants. just in case. you never know.

MistaEnis 3

Friday 18 May 2012 21:59

Annnus juice

lolatyofail 0

Friday 18 May 2012 22:51

2 words Booty sweat

reddudeover 2

Friday 18 May 2012 23:03

76 - Not even close, it arouses the sensation of wanting to puke. Pavlovian or otherwise.

Eiregal2 10

Saturday 19 May 2012 0:02

oh good jebus! (yes I mean to spell it that way) it's very rarely an fml makes me pull a *ick * face,this is one of those fmls. oh ew, the thought of it makes my skin crawl!

lauragp09 5

Saturday 19 May 2012 4:02

Gross!!! Did it smell

tehdarkness 21

Saturday 19 May 2012 4:17

Swass

j_cat187 19

Saturday 19 May 2012 8:24

Must have been from the Chipotle he had for breakfast.

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I agree, your life sucks 5

You deserved it 33

Today, I tried to talk to my teenage son about healthy masculinity. He said, "Yeah Mom, I know. Lift weights and eat red meat and fish. Can I go?" Not what I meant at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 250

You deserved it 371

The Top

Today, while cleaning a carpet in my house, something in it sliced my foot. I couldn't find what it was, so I went to clean the wound. 10 minutes later, I sliced my foot again on the same thing. I still can't figure out what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 247

You deserved it 5 883

Today, I got fired because, while responding to an emergency page for the volunteer fire department to help find a man in a field with a gunshot wound, I backed into a rock with the company truck that I drive to and from work. Nobody asked about the guy with the bullet inside him. He's OK now, in case anyone cares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 979

You deserved it 166

Today, my boyfriend wouldn't have sex with me because he doesn't want his mom "watching from heaven." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 730

You deserved it 7 867

Today, I checked my Facebook notifications to see that someone likes my new single status. My ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 089

You deserved it 5 911

Today, I was walking in rain. I had my hands in my pants pockets, so that the front of the jacket was pointing down. Halfway to Taco Bell, my crotch felt exceptionally wet. I looked down to see a wet spot. The rain on my jacket was channeled to my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 071

You deserved it 6 167

Today, I finally figured out that when a man says, "Maybe some other time, I'll be busy then" more than once, he really means, "I don't really want to see you again. I didn't think you'd actually USE my number." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 341

You deserved it 34 003