Alcohol, Drunk and Health: Today, I saw a quarter in my poop. My friends say I do stupid...

By photomark - 13/12/2011 06:32 - United States

Today, I saw a quarter in my poop. My friends say I do stupid things when I get drunk. Apparently, eating change is one of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 512

You deserved it 37 048

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Same thing different taste

By anna14 - 21/02/2010 19:34 - United States

Today, I learned a little lesson about consequences. Yesterday, I ate a quarter as a dare. Today, I tried to poop it out. It got stuck coming out. I had to go to the doctor and explain everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 148

You deserved it 49 432

By Anonymous - 09/07/2009 05:15 - United States

Today, after buying dinner from the supermarket, I had the change in my hand, and my wallet. In the parking lot, a quarter fell out of my hand, and right next to the street drain. As I went to pick it up, my wallet fell down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 353

You deserved it 11 273

By quarterback - 23/01/2011 05:43 - United States

Today, while at the vending machine, I put in my $20 instead of my $1. I got my change back in quarters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 100

You deserved it 44 603

Drunken antics

By qx5 - 08/01/2011 22:05 - Canada

Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 523

You deserved it 58 094

By Anonymous - 14/05/2015 02:37 - United Kingdom

Today, I got sick of my flatmate stealing my food so I decided to sabotage a leftover pizza with laxatives. I came back home later in the evening after a night of heavy drinking. Guess what I had to eat in my drunken stupor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 258

You deserved it 36 936

By ripped - 11/04/2009 06:10 - Canada

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 240

You deserved it 63 910

By Watchingmyfigure - 06/12/2016 17:55 - United States - Gainesville

Today, I was so hungry and broke that I resorted to drinking salad dressing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 978

You deserved it 1 241

By tripleBBB - 09/09/2018 01:30

Today, I was in the shower when I realised that maybe I'm getting a little too fat. I was scrubbing the old belly when a dollar flew out onto the floor. I'm 23. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 706

You deserved it 2 630

By FattyMcFatterson - 24/06/2009 02:37 - United States

Today, in the shower, a dime fell on my foot. The only place it could have come from? One of my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 803

You deserved it 82 476

Poot

By dumblonde76 - 14/09/2021 07:00 - United States - Jackson

Today, I had a rumble in my tummy whilst picking up groceries. I tried to let out a little poot, but ended up shitting in my pants. I had to leave without the groceries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 377

MrSchneebly 5

Tuesday 13 December 2011 16:03

Kepp checking your poop you could be rich by next month

davidisbeast 12

Tuesday 13 December 2011 16:07

At least you got the quarter back :D that's a whole TWENTY FIVE cents !

Comments

Calyx_fml 21

Tuesday 13 December 2011 21:43

The real FML is when you wonder how many other asses that quarter was in before you ate it.

Arch27 27

Tuesday 13 December 2011 21:51

Are you secretly a Man Bird lover?

vieeev 4

Tuesday 13 December 2011 22:21

I wonder why people look at their poop when they go to the toilet..

curlywurly08 4

Tuesday 13 December 2011 23:10

Time for a change? :L

doorbellrings 0

Wednesday 14 December 2011 0:23

That's why getting drunk isn't the smartest thing to do.

chels1994 11

Wednesday 14 December 2011 1:17

....Stop drinking

chrisinaz 0

Friday 23 December 2011 10:52

what's ur gamertag

babeeylizz 0

Wednesday 14 December 2011 1:45

hahaha, omg thats priceless :b

Okayitwasme 0

Wednesday 14 December 2011 1:51

Be thankful you were not traveling on an airplane! "Cavity check! He keeps setting off the metal detector!" lol

shmuwol 3

Wednesday 14 December 2011 3:31

At least you made some money!!!

brownbear16 0

Wednesday 14 December 2011 3:35

i lost my phone the other day.. can you check for that to?? 'o'

Keywords

Love Surprise Cute Awkward My ex Texting Intimacy Sex Wanker Health Insomnia Sleep Mental health Cooking Food Parents Weekend Kids Pranks Annoying Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Technology Coworkers Zoom Roommate Argument Animals Pizza

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I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 209

Today, I used the Print Screen button to take a picture of a really cute bag that I want for my birthday. After emailing it to my mom, I noticed I'd forgotten to close another tab in the browser. The tab had a very suggestive title, for an even more suggestive website. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 386

You deserved it 34 025

Today, I rented a drill to a straight-up valley girl, with the speech affect, Von Dutch patrol cap and all. I tried to disabuse of her of the idea that aluminum is a form of steel. Apparently, that constitutes being a smartass, so she threw her change at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 610

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Same thing different taste

Drunken antics

Poot

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