Intimacy: Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying...

By Melaknee - 19/03/2009 00:10 - United States

Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 453

You deserved it 149 791

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Same thing different taste

By Chelsea - 02/04/2012 17:31 - United States

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 450

You deserved it 38 898

Bang for your buck

By Anonymous - 24/08/2022 06:00

Today, feeling attractive, I got dressed up and took myself to a trendy bar to enjoy some cocktails. A muscular, handsome man approached me and we began to flirt. He recommended that we get a hotel room, which we did. After we had the most amazing sex of my life, he started to tell me his price. He was an escort. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 965

You deserved it 576

By Anonymous - 11/04/2015 22:05 - United States - Shelby

Today, while walking down the street, a cute guy approached me. We ended up having some drinks then heading back to his place and hooked up. Afterwards, I used the bathroom, and when I came out, he was going through his wallet and asked me how much he owed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 936

You deserved it 11 909

By meesmees - 23/11/2013 10:48 - United States - Severna Park

Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 817

You deserved it 6 812

Messy

By hopeless1 - 26/04/2009 05:40 - United States

Today, I met a really hot guy at a bar. We talked for a while and really seemed to hit it off. We ended up going to my apartment. He stopped and said, "Clean up this mess and maybe we could do something another time." I am a complete neat freak - my apartment had been robbed and trashed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 964

You deserved it 5 845

By pauper - 09/02/2012 01:20

Today, I came home to a homeless man sleeping in my living room. It turns out he thought my house was abandoned due to its disheveled appearance, and decided to break in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 281

You deserved it 8 774

Oh, hi…

By Anonymous - 28/12/2011 15:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I ran into an attractive friend of a friend who I hadn't seen since a night out last month. I tried my best to be friendly and interesting, but he still seemed awkward. Later I find out that last time he saw me, I was blind drunk and vomiting after propositioning him all evening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 964

You deserved it 31 217

Oh, hai Mark!

By SHAME! - 20/05/2019 16:02

Today, I ran into an attractive friend of a friend I hadn't seen since a night out last month. I tried my best to be friendly and interesting, but he still seemed awkward. Later I found out that the last time he saw me I was blind drunk and vomiting after having propositioned him all evening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 973

You deserved it 2 040

By monogamyisalie - 23/07/2015 17:29 - United States

Today, an attractive man hit on me for the first time since I ended my 3-year relationship with my cheating ex. Then the man told me he'd just gotten out of prison last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 044

You deserved it 2 786

Broke

By hobo no-no - 10/11/2020 08:00 - United States

Today, I saw my ex asking for change outside a store. I was so shocked and sad to see him in such a position, I offered to take him home with me, let him shower and cook him a good meal. He laughed in my face and said, "Nah, I just do this for some quick bucks. It’s easier than working." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 175

You deserved it 157

L4m3r 3

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:15

I'm not one to judge, but you have to admit that such things are part of the risk you take when you sleep with random people. You're not wrong to have sex to your heart's content, but I don't think you have a lot of room to complain about the result, either. I'd recommend going to a clinic ASAP, by the way.

Ineffableturtle 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:04

no need to judge, and least the sex was good?

Comments

Ineffableturtle 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:04

no need to judge, and least the sex was good?

mlipro 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:19

Lmao, how could you not know it was a bum? Did the dirty beard, three jackets and the shopping cart not give it away?

fyl12345678901 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 7:03

you hope

Kid34 0

Monday 18 July 2011 22:04

211- I know right

digitalangel 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:06

Well, at least you helped a person in need, right?

Green_Eyes_Pwn 0

Sunday 2 May 2010 7:43

She helped him quite a bit. *wink wink nudge nudge* :P

nic7973 23

Saturday 18 February 2012 3:17

that bloody hilarious!

Yaheed 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:06

You slept with a bum? Well atleast you didn't know he was a bum until it was too late.

bula_rocks 0

Monday 3 May 2010 8:00

attractive hobos

mf_fml 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:13

heh, awesomeeeee.

L4m3r 3

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:15

applebee_16 0

Friday 30 July 2010 10:25

exactly....and at least he only stole bread and cheese, that's lucky for you op he coulda stole something more valuable...and you should get checked out ;)

lolmaster7654321 4

Tuesday 31 May 2011 4:30

it makes sense though cuz bread and cheese last a while...

mofran 0

Sunday 28 August 2011 4:03

how ******* old are you?

not1 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:15

he couldn't be THAT bad, right? you wouldn't have sex with somone smelly or anything right? RIGHT?!;)

digapygmy 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:16

Are you my senior English teacher? She had a thing for bums too. ;)

2214rachel 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 22:42

hahahahahahahah

green_199 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:17

This one is a total lie. And if it isn't, what's the big deal? Why shouldn't a homeless dude get play?

Reasonable_man 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:18

Soo.. you must not have talked for very long then. You deserved it. If you actually care about residency, financial stability, etc. then talk a little longer; however, if that wasn't what you were looking for then why do you pretend to care after the fact? Lesson learned & what #5 said.

thequeenofscots 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 9:23

So? You slept had casual sex with somebody you met outside of a club. That's the risk. It's your business whether or not you want to do it, but you're a risk of things like this happening if you're going to let people you've only known for a few minutes into your apartment. I feel worse for the bum. He doesn't have an apartment.