Animals: Today, I saw my dog sleeping, so I laid next to her and put her...

By phillyfan4life - 21/02/2011 19:50 - United States

Today, I saw my dog sleeping, so I laid next to her and put her arm around my neck to be cute. Only for her to wake up and bite my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 810

You deserved it 28 487

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 15/12/2013 06:47 - United States - Fresno

Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 366

You deserved it 35 763

By Anonymous - 24/10/2015 16:41 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I woke up to my dog laying on the pillow next to me. When he saw that I was awake, he wagged his tail happily and then promptly sneezed in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 525

You deserved it 3 240

By anonamous - 12/03/2012 21:45 - United States

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 165

You deserved it 9 126

By Anonymous - 24/01/2011 05:40 - Egypt

Today, I woke up, patted my dog and kissed his nose. He was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 682

You deserved it 4 334

Good boy

By AgathedeBlouse - 18/11/2008 06:42 - France

Today, as I do every morning, I woke up and gave my dog, who sleeps next to me, a kiss on the nose. Except that this morning he had been sleeping the other way round. I kissed him on the ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 566

You deserved it 25 172

By Anonymous - 27/08/2014 23:04 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 582

You deserved it 7 518

By Anonymous - 21/10/2014 15:49 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 822

You deserved it 7 808

By RomanceFail - 02/04/2015 12:51 - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 041

You deserved it 3 381

By ricard0 - 27/02/2014 20:58 - United States - Petaluma

Today, I fell asleep on the couch, only to wake up later with my dog's tongue over my mouth. That was my first ever kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 066

You deserved it 6 145

By Noname - 02/02/2009 04:31 - United States

Today, I was looking after my parents house and their wiener dog, and fell asleep on the couch. The dog climbed onto my shoulders and rested behind my head like a doggie neck pillow. All was great until she farted right in my left ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 820

You deserved it 7 061

mintcar 9

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:56

You put your arm around your dog to be " cute?" Strange reason.

ImaginaryFoe 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 1:02

"Let sleeping dogs lie." Never wondered why that's an old adage, huh?

Comments

prettypinkpixie 9

Tuesday 22 February 2011 3:27

You really shouldn't mess with a sleeping dog... I had a friend who was bit in the eye by his dog because he startled her while she was sleeping. It doesnt matter how loving of an animal it is, it's not smart to get your face close to them while they are sleeping.

milakitty21 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 9:14

who the hell are you? The puppy police?

grdianknight 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 4:18

ydi, dogs or people, doesn't matter, they wake up and you're in their face, expect them to react.

Sammara 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 4:29

How is this f-ing anyone's life? Your dog has arms! You're rich!

eclecticstrings 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 4:31

dogs have arms now? dun dun dun dunnnnnnnnnnn

KingDingALing 9

Tuesday 22 February 2011 4:51

12- Well, what type of jokes were you expecting from a guy whose username is Every1luvsboners?

Juliaa15 6

Tuesday 22 February 2011 5:02

Well I kinda misread your comment. But you misread the FML. Wahh. But still!

SiobahnR 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 5:08

:( unfortunately some dogs are prone to do that it all depends on their breed and how easily they are startled. don't take it personally OP I'm sure he or she still loves you.