Sex, Porn and Geek: Today, I set my AIM status to be the currently-playing file on... - FML

By ohshittttttt - 04/04/2009 16:15 - United States

Spicy

Today, I set my AIM status to be the currently-playing file on my iTunes. I've downloaded a lot of porn to my iTunes, and I wanted to watch some. My status changed to "Girl in Latex gets fucked in the ass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 502

You deserved it 158 549

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/04/2009 20:21 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was getting ready for bed, when I decided to watch some porno on the computer. Suddenly someone from my messenger list says, "You might want to turn off the 'What You're Listening To' option if you're watching porn." I snapped and exited the porn. 63 people saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 632

You deserved it 77 891

By cardsftw - 16/08/2012 19:50 - United States - Compton

Today, I was so bored that I actually read the iTunes store's terms and conditions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 162

You deserved it 8 414

By MyHeadHurts - 20/01/2012 10:42 - Ireland

Spicy

Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 213

You deserved it 39 612

By RollieCollieUSA - 30/01/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. Before, I reached over to her computer and put on "Your Body is a Wonderland". Surprisingly, I lasted through the song and didn't realize her iTunes was on random. "Rape Me" by Nirvana came on. I still finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 733

You deserved it 6 668

Now casting

By WhyAppleWhy - 01/09/2012 23:14 - United States - Sarasota

Spicy

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 567

You deserved it 52 861

TMI FML

By Addison - 25/06/2012 00:28 - Canada - Kingston

Spicy

Today, my sister was "sexting" her boyfriend over Apple messages. Since we share an iTunes account the messages appeared on my iPod. Apparently, he shouldn't be silly, and should wrap his willy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 977

You deserved it 3 644

By acnecream - 03/05/2013 13:23 - Finland - Kinnulanlahti

Spicy

Today, I was hitting on a cute girl on the bus. It was going well, and she gave me her name to add on Facebook. Since I didn't have the app, I opened Safari on my phone. It opened to my video from Pornhub I watched yesterday and started playing, on full volume, through the entire bus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 308

You deserved it 73 834

By Anonymous - 10/07/2015 18:19 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was having computer problems, so I let my friend have remote access to fix them. We were video-chatting on Skype at the time, and so he thought it'd be hilarious to load hardcore porn in my browser the moment he saw my mom enter the room from behind me. I'm now grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 540

You deserved it 3 422

By sadinthesack - 31/08/2009 18:56 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was making love to my girlfriend and was pretty impressed with myself for lasting through multiple songs. Then I realized her ipod was playing a medley. I only lasted 3 1/2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 897

You deserved it 10 944

By tbeemcgeebee - 01/08/2010 05:05 - United States

Today, at 2 am on a Saturday, I purposely updated my Facebook status from my iPod so people will see that I posted from a 'mobile device' and think I'm out at a bar having a life, instead of sitting at home on my bed watching movies on my Netflix. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 925

You deserved it 33 661

Next

Top comments

alicemassie 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 23:38

gee, i think thats number one on itunes!

Shigogaboo 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 23:37

Wow...wow

Comments

Bryan_Z 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 4:06

at least it wasnt gay, you could've been outed (hypothetically)

JVonDahl 9

Sunday 5 April 2009 4:14

That's what you get for watching ****. Sucks to be you.

SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 4:32

I wish I could do that. I'm wicked jealous. Not with the ****, but put what I'm listening to on iTunes as my status. Yeah... >_>

Ox_Baker 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 4:49

Who downloads **** from iTunes?

arcune 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 5:04

haha, that's very funny but you deserved that entirely.

sexxystephy 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 5:06

Hahaha! FUNNIEST FML i've heard.

KenMcGormick 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 5:14

totally deserved it... if im tagging my status to the videos/songs im listening... i make sure they are clean =)

SirAndrew 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 5:22

HAHAHA! Deserved it.

frenchfriez888 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 5:38

u can get that shit on itunes???????? DOUBT IT. ur such a faker

lazytown 0

Monday 21 December 2009 2:27

You're an idiot.

aliibaibii 0

Sunday 28 March 2010 8:38

^^ agreed. obviously these people don't know how to use iTunes.

Quinnjamin 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 5:48

normally people check what their status is after they set it just in case of something like that...YDI

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The Top

Today, I was grocery shopping when a little kid pointed at me and yelled, "Mommy, look! It's the man from the cereal box!" I don’t know whether to feel flattered or insulted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 328

You deserved it 84

Today, I was dead tired and just wanted sleep, so I jumped into bed the second the day's chores were done. Of fucking course, this was the day my fiancée decided to end our eight-week dry spell and came in wearing sexy lingerie. I couldn't stay hard due to exhaustion, and now she's been crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 254

You deserved it 81

The Top

Today, I was fired when a customer called corporate, saying I was unprofessional and rude. The "customer" in question was my little sister, who I would not let buy beer with a fake ID. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 341

You deserved it 3 086

Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 911

You deserved it 19 542

Today, the manager that made my life a living hell for 3 years, who was demoted 6 weeks ago and transferred to another store, was transferred back to us as a salesperson. Now we work side by side 42 hours a week on the same exact schedule. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 299

You deserved it 192

Today, I was laying down with my girlfriend, when she asked me if I'd ever been kicked in the junk. I awkwardly said no, and she replied, "Well maybe that should change." while rubbing my shoulder lovingly. I'm scared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 976

You deserved it 4 978

Today, my six year-old son asked me, "Dad, what's a glory hole?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 112

Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 613

You deserved it 7 233