By draegoncode - 26/07/2010 04:34 - France

Spicy
Today, I told my girlfriend of 2 years that I was sexually abused as a kid. She was only the third person I've told. She reacted by breaking up with me because I "might do something" to her kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks 70 615
You deserved it 4 526

Same thing different taste

Top comments

FFML_314 11

Abuse is a horribly traumatic thing to endure at any point in your life. I'm sorry OP that you had to go through that. I hope the person that hurt you is rotting in jail or in hell. I have 0 tolerance for abusers. I hate people that make excuses for someone that's abusive. You shouldn't be able to walk this earth if you allow such evil to escape from your body! I have dealt with so many sex offenders and it makes me sick to think about the things these people would do. Your girlfriend is obviously being insensitive, but she may just be scared.

Comments

I'm sorry but how the **** did the OP 'totally deserve it'?

ZombieLumber 0

Wow. Just wow. There are very few and far between FMLs that have actually made me care for the person and honestly feel that something horrible has happened in their life. This is definitely one of them. I actually created an account for the sole purpose of replying to this. I was borderline molested as a child myself and my best friend was raped multiple times while growing up. It is beyond words and and no person should ever have to endure such trauma, much less a defenseless child. Rape and molestation are equivalent to torture as far I'm concerned. I am truly sorry you had to endure such an atrocity. As for the ex-girlfriend, I'm going to be delicate with my words because have no idea whether or not you still care about her. I'm hoping no, yet I realize you were just in a committed relationship and probably felt very strongly for her, given your honesty. She acted rashly, fueled by emotion, and gave no concern whatsoever for your feelings and trust. It's unfathomable to me how someone can be that hurtful after a person tells them a memory which is so deep within them and painful. I understand that she was concerned for her children, like any upstanding parent should be, but her actions were completely out of line. Instead of betraying your trust and potentially causing you even more suffering in your life, she should have merely told her fear to you and not allowed to see her children until that fear was resolved. This may involve counseling or other things, but destroying the relationship was flat out wrong. Sure, maybe her fear would have been too much and the relationship would have depleted over time. But, at least that way, you wouldn't be instantly rejected for sharing such an intimate secret with her. It was brash, cruel, and wrong and you, as a human being, deserve so very, very much better. I sincerely hope that, someday, you find someone you love. And they love you just as much in return. Then you'll be able to tell your secret once more, and this person will treat you with all the compassion, sympathy, love, kindness, and caring in the world.

rungingerrun 0

holy shit what an insensitive bitch. I think you're better off without her although it really sucks it had to end that way... :(

that's just wrong. go pimp slap her for me!

wesmaster169 0

if you only told 3 people...... now you told the whole world not sure you thought that through

anonymously though. what's the big deal with that?

wow thats really ****** up... i seen your comment above doesnt seem like it bothers you that much anymore so **** that bitch =)

Dibil 0

Wow thats harsh.I feel sorry for you,your ex is a BITCH

Harsh. Totally harsh. Regardless of what creates a child molester and what potential is there, the fact that you are in therapy should have shown her that you recognise the issue and are taking positive, preventative steps to deal with it. She should have been supportive of you. That said, you can't totally judge her for her gut reactions and feelings on the matter. People react emotionally to things and logic often doesn't factor in, regardless oh how hard you, or anyone else, tries. It's a sad fact of life. Emotions will always over ride logical thought for some people. It's probably better that it's over though, because if she feels this way, she will never trust you and always think that you have done something every times her child cries or is scared.

FFML_314 11

I completely disagree. I see this as something that was thought more with logic then emotion. She obviously had feelings for him, given the fact that they were in a relationship and based on experience, I would say if she were to base her choice on emotion, she would have stayed with him considering that's who her emotions were towards. Now, seeing as she decided to walk away from the relationship (which is usually not an easy thing to do) in my opinion, was based solely on logic and reasoning. You can't expect somebody to always do what most people view is right. I'm sure she's not a heartless person and I'm sure OP is well aware that her children are more important.

part of what you are saying is the point I'm trying to make. You can't judge this woman and call her nasty names for what she did. She did what she thought was right. However, my point on the emotions is that, I think, she acted emotionally by ending things. She reacted in a way to protect her children from a perceived risk, in a way that parents should initially act. I think that if it was a completely logical and reasoned decision, devoid of emotion, the fact that OP is in counseling to deal with this event and the subsequent issues, should have been a huge mitigating factor in her decision. Instead she acted out of fear for a potential of OP abusing her children because "...some people turn around and become abusers themselves..." (OP paraphrasing ex's words in follow up comment). This is an emotional response to the event. There is nothing wrong with this and this woman should not be villianized for this, but it seems to me that the response was born out of fear and not reason. Just my opinion.

RedPillSucks 31

That and there is no logic to assuming OP would be a molester. See comment #91

Absolutely. And that is part of the point I was making. If the gf was being logical and not emotional, and again you can't blame her for being emotional about her children, she would have realized this.

claudiame 0