Miscellaneous: Today, I took a dump without checking for toilet paper. I then... - FML

By Anonymous - 27/08/2011 23:07 - Canada

Today, I took a dump without checking for toilet paper. I then called my step dad, who said "use the stuff in the garbage." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 504

You deserved it 5 644

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Same thing different taste

By FUCKFACECUNT - 02/08/2015 13:32 - United Arab Emirates - Abu Dhabi

Today, I took a dump at work, when I realized there was no toilet paper left. There was another guy in the room, so I asked him for some. He decided he'd rather dump all the rolls of paper into the other toilets, before wishing me luck and walking out while laughing his ass off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 684

You deserved it 2 388

By Oh dear - 05/07/2012 22:15 - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines - Kingstown

Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 619

You deserved it 2 732

Shit for brains

By Anonymous - 31/10/2023 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 182

You deserved it 653

TW: Gross

By sweet_stufz - 11/11/2010 13:30 - Canada

Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 651

You deserved it 38 899

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 18:33 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 918

You deserved it 8 678

Autopilot

By TuteBananaCupcake - 29/12/2023 14:00 - United States - Dayton

Today, I used the last of the toilet paper to blow my nose while taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 148

You deserved it 571

Always check!

By Anonymous - 17/02/2023 06:00 - United States - Bayonne

Today, after eating some fire noodles the day before, I took a nice long poop in my school's bathroom, only to find out there was no toilet paper left in any of the stalls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 730

You deserved it 229

By IAmACoolCat - 05/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 521

You deserved it 4 962

By shootme - 13/11/2011 22:46 - Canada

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 346

You deserved it 58 544

By Anonymous - 05/02/2015 15:32 - United States - Glen Allen

Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find no toilet paper and a piece of shitty wallpaper in the bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 428

You deserved it 2 795

Next

Top comments

DarkHelmet 10

Sunday 28 August 2011 9:22

YDI Enjoy walking around with crusty asscheeks

regsworld11 2

Sunday 28 August 2011 9:47

You are disgusting.

Comments

ocrows96 0

Sunday 28 August 2011 15:30

ewww..fyl

AmberCanFlyy 4

Sunday 28 August 2011 16:18

Washrag? Towel? Papertowel? Tissue?

coltsrock37 15

Sunday 28 August 2011 16:31

This is when you use a towel and shamelessly discard of it in the most inconspicuous way possible.

manda_rawrz 4

Sunday 28 August 2011 17:19

use kleenex.

samijade 0

Sunday 28 August 2011 18:06

At least that stuff only has snot on it.. The last time I looked in the bathroom garbage can there was toilet paper with a whole bunch of poop smeared on it.. :O

jlh2283 1

Sunday 28 August 2011 19:09

What's the big deal? I used the stuff in the garbage before.

yeaaahbuddy3 6

Sunday 28 August 2011 20:09

your stepdad seems sanitary.. #winning?

weirdo22228 4

Sunday 28 August 2011 21:39

use your hand duh

Tahmer 0

Sunday 28 August 2011 23:53

Been there done that. Just use the toilet paper your mom used to wipe her vag, thats what I did.

Lenho 26

Monday 29 August 2011 17:49

EW

Stupend0us 7

Monday 29 August 2011 5:18

Get a bidet and this won't be as big of an issue in the future. Besides using just TP to clean your ass is disgusting. I like giving myself a good spray down back there post defecation especially so after having some Mexican.

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I agree, your life sucks 48 567

You deserved it 3 818

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I agree, your life sucks 13 484

You deserved it 28 373

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I agree, your life sucks 97 236

You deserved it 4 686

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I agree, your life sucks 22 784

You deserved it 5 603