Miscellaneous: Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie....

By troll of a gran - 08/01/2013 17:10 - United States - Oklahoma City

Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 836

You deserved it 4 861

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Same thing different taste

Stunned silence

By Anonymous - 20/12/2014 22:42 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 184

You deserved it 3 914

By Momlovesme - 08/08/2009 00:43 - United States

Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 253

You deserved it 17 460

Let her have her fun

By WHY GRANDMA - 17/06/2023 20:00 - United States

Today, I was at a restaurant with my grandma. A young, ripped gentleman suddenly walked through the door and my grandma looked at him and shouted, "Look! Eye candy!" as loud as she could. He heard it and was extremely embarrassed. To make it worse, my grandma is a widow, so she might have actually meant it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 193

By no tea parties here, gran - 11/04/2013 17:16 - United States

Today, my racist, homophobic, generally degenerate grandmother visited. Within 20 minutes, she uttered multiple racial slurs, said Robert Downey Jr. will burn in hell for playing a black man in one of his movies, and yelled that she'd "whip the piss" out of me, after I asked her to leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 719

You deserved it 6 189

Grandma rocks!

By Anonymous - 20/04/2014 21:38 - Slovenia - Domzale

Today, I decided to be nice and pay a visit to my grandma. We ended up playing Scrabble. In between passing wind that smelled like rotting eggs, she kept playing the filthiest words she could, and yelled at me whenever I checked to see if they were in the Scrabble dictionary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 483

You deserved it 5 217

By Anonymous - 01/08/2015 03:39 - United States - Pasadena

Today, I was on the phone with my senile grandma, when I told her I had to go because I had an appointment at the clinic. For some reason, she assumed I was talking about an abortion clinic, and started raging at me and calling me a murderer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 502

You deserved it 1 924

By booste - 18/10/2009 04:06 - Canada

Today, I was written up because my manager heard me insulting a customer. How did I insult her? I called her grandma. Who did I say this to? My grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 764

You deserved it 2 268

SHUSH

By Anonymous - 05/03/2023 12:00

Today, I went to see a movie with my mum. She kept asking me questions throughout the entire film, and not necessarily about the movie. I lost my cool when she asked me a bit too loudly for comfort if I regretted being dumped my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 119

By lady_jeni - 09/07/2009 07:29 - United States

Today, I went to see my grandmother. She has alzheimers and doesn't remember me sometimes, and today she thought I was her sister and that I was trying to steal my grandfather from her. She hit me with a cane and called me a slut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 521

You deserved it 3 237

By bribreeeeeezyfreshhh - 06/12/2010 17:03 - United Kingdom

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 941

You deserved it 27 195

itsalanis 25

Tuesday 8 January 2013 22:38

I love your grandma.

holagranola 15

Tuesday 8 January 2013 22:40

Just be glad she didn't strip down and refuse to put her clothes back on.

Comments

MikeyScene420 17

Wednesday 9 January 2013 5:20

The hell kind of movie did you take your grandma to see??

Cupcake040 17

Wednesday 9 January 2013 5:47

Unlike the person singing during the movie and getting a drink poured on them, I'd love to hear you grandma in a theatre.

xSalashawty 30

Wednesday 9 January 2013 8:31

Better than her being pissed about one swear. ^^;

TheDeafWalrus 8

Wednesday 9 January 2013 15:20

Grandma don't give a shit!

JDCH_99 10

Wednesday 9 January 2013 16:00

Back in the 80s, my grandmother, who was in her 80s and did not speak English well, went to see a movie about Porky Pig. Too bad it was Porkies.

davek 36

Wednesday 9 January 2013 18:35

Your gran sounds like a laugh. What's she like after a couple of beers?

Vidimus 13

Thursday 10 January 2013 4:31

Your gramma is one top-tier troll, OP.

doglover100 28

Thursday 10 January 2013 23:54

Haha

SweetLuna 10

Friday 11 January 2013 5:10

Haha that's so awesome! Best grandma ever!

kathbutter 12

Friday 11 January 2013 21:28

was that film bridesmaids? I took my grandma to that too

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Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. Her phone rang, and she stopped to answer it. It was her ex-boyfriend, calling her from jail. She talked to him for 15 minutes. To top it all off, before she hung up, I heard her tell him she loved him, and couldn't wait for him to get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 822

You deserved it 4 306

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I agree, your life sucks 9

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 37 412

You deserved it 8 938

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend, who is a fully-grown man, that making dinosaur noises in public is no longer acceptable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 356

You deserved it 7 695

Today, I was trying to get a good night's sleep before the huge exam tomorrow, which I'm extremely anxious about. The SAME night my neighbor below me is having a home birth. It lasted NINE HOURS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 267

You deserved it 1 111

Today, while on a blind date, I told her in no uncertain terms that if I got married, my wife would need to be a housewife. She burst out laughing and asked, "Dude, do you even HAVE a house?" and walked out laughing when I said I didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 1 627

Today, I messed up by forgetting that reflections on glasses can make a private experience VERY public. I only this realized after my mom asked what I was looking at; she definitely saw a lot more dick than she would have liked. I feel like such a perv. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 401

Today, my best friend jokingly blocked my number until I apply for a job. She is also supposed to be picking me up from the airport, so now I have no way to contact her to tell her what time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 919

You deserved it 1 137