Intimacy: Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told...

By Andrew - 20/04/2011 16:31 - United States

Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 391

You deserved it 11 737

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Same thing different taste

By baron - 01/06/2009 17:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131 677

You deserved it 7 573

By Anonymous - 06/07/2011 23:35 - Canada

Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 801

You deserved it 12 450

By rj - 12/05/2012 14:42 - United States - Goddard

Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 566

You deserved it 5 829

By Anonymous - 15/02/2010 01:49 - United States

Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 619

You deserved it 2 554

Double whammy

By Anonymous - 28/02/2023 16:00 - Argentina

Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and walked out. This is two days after she informed me that she is unexpectedly pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 82

By doomed - 22/08/2009 17:46 - United States

Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 430

You deserved it 6 700

Just can't get enough

By Anonymous - 13/02/2023 06:00

Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 251

You deserved it 224

By Anonymous - 05/12/2010 01:28 - United States

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 494

You deserved it 3 967

By Anonymous - 29/08/2013 18:12 - United States - Mount Clemens

Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 783

You deserved it 6 550

By Jack - 30/11/2013 08:31 - United States - Reynoldsburg

Today, I realized my girlfriend has been "on her period" for almost two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 476

You deserved it 12 088

Wheredidgrungego 12

Wednesday 20 April 2011 22:03

She just didn't want the baby to be poked by your ****.

blueocean43 2

Wednesday 20 April 2011 22:06

Some women keep having periods when they are pregnant, maybe she is one of them.

Comments

doublehuh 2

Sunday 10 July 2011 15:25

you know some pregnant women still have their period.

HeartAndSoul2011 0

Saturday 23 July 2011 22:17

ydi for wanted to have sex with a pregnant woman...an hopefully it's your child ,just saying

HeartAndSoul2011 0

Saturday 23 July 2011 22:17

ydi for wanted to have sex with a pregnant woman...an hopefully it's your child, just saying

jellybelliez 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 10:21

some women have there period even while they are pregnate

i_rain_tears 0

Wednesday 7 September 2011 1:41

Girls can still have their period while pregnant. Ask a doctor

sighffs 0

Saturday 5 November 2011 16:34

Next time ask for anal? ;)

teganator 7

Sunday 4 December 2011 18:59

Menstruation during pregnancy is natural and common. Suck it up, buttercup.

jpmann 2

Wednesday 4 January 2012 22:03

Owned

digitaljunky 5

Saturday 31 March 2012 23:40

Welcome to fatherhood...

jenna73011 3

Friday 27 April 2012 0:54

Haven't you done enough already?

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The Top

Today, I was denied food stamp assistance. Apparently, you need to work 20 hours a week while being a full time student to qualify or have a work study. I was recently suspended from my work study for calling off because my aunt died, and if I worked 20 hours a week, why would I need food stamps? FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 150

You deserved it 5 868

Today, my husband threw a bitch-fit and made passive aggressive remarks throughout the entire day. What did I do? Call him out on commenting an eggplant, peach, and winky face emoji under a female friend’s picture. He deactivated all social media accounts and shouted, “Are you happy now? I can’t talk to anyone now!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 558

You deserved it 95

The Top

Today, for the first time all month I felt truly proud and accomplished. I finally figured out how to change the toilet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 885

You deserved it 24 109

Today, I went to my academic counselor to help me deal with my stress and anxiety, which has been making me nauseous from the constant strain. She suggested exercise to help these feelings. Every time I do so, I vomit. From the anxiety and stress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 094

You deserved it 5 442

Today, the tickets I bought for my favorite band's concert arrived in the mail. The concert was last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 014

You deserved it 4 617

Today, I was on my way home when I saw a cop hiding behind a Budget truck. I immediately slowed down and prayed that he wouldn't give me a ticket. Then I realized I was walking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 158

You deserved it 95 493

Today, I was on a very crowded bus, standing near the back door. People had to get off at the stop, and being near the door, I had to step off the bus, allowing the people to exit. I was about to enter back into the bus, the door closed and the bus driver took off, leaving me stranded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 975

You deserved it 5 951

Today, I helped a nice middle-aged lady pick out a sweater. She then opened her changing room door to ask for my opinion. I still don't understand why she had to take everything else off to try on a sweater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 207

You deserved it 4 872

Same thing different taste

Double whammy

Just can't get enough

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