Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to open a can with a potato peeler. For a minute... - FML

By maryfaithh - 27/01/2012 16:30 - United States

Today, I tried to open a can with a potato peeler. For a minute I forgot what a can opener looked like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 515

You deserved it 25 999

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/11/2010 17:14 - United States

Today, I tried opening a can for the first time using a manual can opener. I tried for a half hour to open a can of ravioli, mutilating the can in the process. Only after watching five Youtube videos on how to use a manual can opener did I notice the pull-tab on the top of the ravioli can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 858

You deserved it 65 724

Cooked

By Anonymous - 21/04/2023 03:00

Today, I tried to make mashed potatoes but then went into another room to wait on them, then forgot about them, ruining my only big pot and a full bag of potatoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 210

You deserved it 865

By razordot - 28/02/2019 09:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, after complaining all my life that no one makes a decent can opener, I have realised that I have been using them the wrong way. I finally figured out that the cutting blade goes on the SIDE of the can not the TOP. I'm 57 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 089

You deserved it 2 081

By missgayle319 - 15/03/2012 07:53 - United States

Today, I decided to finally try out the veggie slicer I bought a few months ago to make healthy homemade potato chips. Along with the sliced potatoes, I am now missing about a quarter inch chunk of skin from the side of my hand and quite a bit of blood. At least the chips were good. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 282

You deserved it 13 021

Great idea

By dumbbb - 27/12/2011 08:30 - United States

Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 264

You deserved it 46 028

Slicy slicy

By nessacadesa - 24/03/2009 04:47 - United States

Today, I was telling my younger brother and sister how important it is to know how to use a knife properly, all while slicing potatoes. Just as I was saying how stupid people can be with knives, the potato slipped on the counter. I sliced open my hand while talking about knife safety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 988

You deserved it 58 483

Mush

By Tired Tater - 05/06/2023 20:00 - New Zealand - Christchurch

Today, I over-boiled some potatoes. I was having a bad day and this tipped me over the edge. I burst into tears and threw the potatoes all over my kitchen. I then stomped on the piping hot potatoes. The bottoms of my feet are blistered and still feel like they’re burning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 1 463

By Anonymous - 05/01/2017 11:20

Today, I found out what rotten cooked potato both smells and tastes like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 779

You deserved it 1 874

By dancincherrychic - 25/10/2015 19:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was making sweet potato chips using my new slicer. I didn't mean to make a pinky finger chip as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 930

You deserved it 3 511

Adulting is tough

By Anonymous - 10/08/2024 00:00 - Canada

Today, in last ditch attempt to be an adult, I trotted out to do my grocery shopping for the week. As I confidently strode through the produce aisle, I grabbed what I thought was a nice, ripe mango. At checkout, the cashier kindly informed me it was in fact a massive potato. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 531

Next

Top comments

that1guyyy 12

Friday 27 January 2012 18:46

That's uncanny

DocBastard 38

Friday 27 January 2012 18:48

You dumbass! The potato peeler is for mixing things, and the can opener is for slicing pizza. You're supposed to use the microwave to open cans. Everyone knows that.

Comments

patzz12 0

Friday 27 January 2012 19:10

Fail?????

perdix 29

Friday 27 January 2012 19:20

Why the five question marks? Do you need to verify it with The Swarm that the OP failed? As a member of said swarm, I say the OP started off failing, but eventually redeemed herself. I give her a B.

trentalophogus 5

Friday 27 January 2012 19:18

Seriously, when did this website become about people bragging about stupid they are?

TheFirstSamurai 18

Friday 27 January 2012 19:27

Since the beginning. Check the 10th FML.

perdix 29

Friday 27 January 2012 19:27

Since January 13, 2009, according to Wikipedia.

GoW_Chick 14

Friday 27 January 2012 23:14

When did people start bitching about every FML posted? It's like a common thing now, just make a damn witty comment, if you can, or take the easy way out like most do and say you're stupid, idiot etc., and just move on.

Michael_92 20

Friday 27 January 2012 19:18

Time to take a trip to a special padded room where no such items exist??

IBelongToJeebus 0

Friday 27 January 2012 19:39

Aww! Your life totally sucks! Hardly the worst problem if you ask me...

Garon300 0

Friday 27 January 2012 19:47

Sounds like you had a bad case of Brainfart.

JayJavaMonsterr 10

Friday 27 January 2012 19:49

I have to know: Did it work? I lost my can-opener -.-

msjoyfull84 0

Friday 27 January 2012 19:52

How much did you smoke?!?!

eveadamsnyc 2

Friday 27 January 2012 20:05

Dude. You should see a dr.

Vinnie0329 0

Friday 27 January 2012 20:30

I like pooping

Dcm210 19

Friday 27 January 2012 20:34

some have the top opening thing like a soda can so i forgot as well.

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