Miscellaneous: Today, I walked into the Macy's bathroom to find Santa taking...

By tishihish - 12/12/2011 05:15 - United States

Today, I walked into the Macy's bathroom to find Santa taking a dump with the door open. Merry Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 934

You deserved it 2 821

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Same thing different taste

By ww2freak - 14/06/2012 01:17 - United States - Centreville

Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 948

You deserved it 27 350

By Santa - 12/12/2011 21:45 - Canada

Today, I was working at the mall as Santa, when a little girl took a shit in my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 055

You deserved it 4 410

By teaspoonzz - 25/10/2017 15:00

Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 631

You deserved it 286

By Anonymous - 11/12/2010 04:59 - Canada

Today, I had to clean bathroom duties at work. Someone wrote "Merry Christmas" on the wall in their own shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 392

You deserved it 2 727

By moopymoplady - 29/11/2011 00:44 - Canada

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 279

You deserved it 5 629

By Anonymous - 18/12/2012 05:15 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 872

You deserved it 6 309

By KP - 25/06/2009 16:22 - United States

Today, while I was working a customer notified me that the men's restroom need some attention. Thinking that there was just a small mess, I walked into the restroom only to discover someone had taken a crap in the sink. Guess who got to clean it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 125

You deserved it 3 096

By BathroomMuch - 25/12/2009 16:15 - United States

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 874

You deserved it 7 741

By Loola - 21/12/2008 05:04 - France

Today, Father Christmas touched my ass in a shopping mall. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen on Christmas Day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 907

You deserved it 2 543

Spooky season has begun

By Anonymous - 04/10/2019 00:01

Today, I was at work at a kiosk in the mall when I smelled something foul. I thought it was the weird dude who'd just walked by so I just carried on with my work. Minutes later, I looked to my right and there, lying on the floor a few feet from me, was a huge turd wrapped in toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 622

You deserved it 161

EwanSmith 2

Monday 12 December 2011 11:51

could have been worse, he could of been emptying his sack.

DDpandaz 0

Monday 12 December 2011 11:56

Merry Shitmas OP

Comments

DaMan25 4

Tuesday 13 December 2011 1:55

Hahahaha that made my boring ass night

Hungry_Panda 3

Tuesday 13 December 2011 2:27

He probably got the urge to take a shit after a little girl shit on his lap. You never know...

DalekScythe 0

Tuesday 13 December 2011 5:30

nice references to the FML posted earlier! :)

MissTimeLord 3

Tuesday 13 December 2011 2:40

Well you know what they say...everybody poops

Not_You_Again 15

Tuesday 13 December 2011 3:02

Howdy Ho!

Autumnie 0

Tuesday 13 December 2011 4:07

Why the hell are you upset about this? It's a guy using the bathroom. I would understand if you're a five-year-old, but seriously?

justinhere 3

Tuesday 13 December 2011 4:14

looks like he had some gifts to send down the chimney..... disturbing

bladerox4 0

Tuesday 13 December 2011 6:25

Well he try's to watch everyone. Or the other way around

mommykrissy_05 7

Tuesday 13 December 2011 6:40

Wheres a camera when you need one! Perfect holiday card! lol

sniperkit 10

Sunday 18 December 2011 5:05

Today, my brother sent me a holiday card with a picture of a fake Santa taking a dump on it. Now my five year old won't stop crying because he realized that Santa isn't real. FML

OfficeNinja 5

Tuesday 13 December 2011 17:05

Santa is magical, but not so magical that he never craps!

Akalia_fml 7

Wednesday 14 December 2011 0:23

Well, that’s just classy…

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Work Relatable My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Snow Weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said, "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him every day now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 531

You deserved it 32 700

Today, the woman I love, who rejected me countless times, got a boyfriend. Bitter about it, I post on my Instagram Story: “I could have been your love bug, but apparently you’re into roaches.” She posted a story of them kissing, saying, “I love my roach so much!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 47

You deserved it 1 332

The Top

Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 963

You deserved it 40 870

Today, my future sister-in-law told me that not only will I have to host her bachelorette party at my new, still under construction house, but she has also booked a sex consultant to come and give a toy presentation. There's a $350 minimum spend. Only 5 people are coming, 4 of which are family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 259

You deserved it 352

Today, I woke up early to go to church with my parents. When I got in the car, I was struck with the worst diarrhea I've ever had in my life. My parents told me I'd be cleaning the car out when we got there, because if we turned around, we'd be late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 533

You deserved it 3 218

Today, I was walking down the street when someone started yelling at me, saying I was dead. I bolted, ran into a pole and when they caught up to me, said "Oh, wrong person." and walked off, leaving me bruised on the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 076

You deserved it 2 705

Today, I met my older sister's cute male roommate. Everything was going smoothly until he asked if I was her mother. I’m only 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 390

You deserved it 226

Today, after several days of deep-cleaning my house, I found a huge section of my room covered in black mold. I almost puked when I saw it. Not only could that have put anyone in the hospital, but it also explains why I've been getting sick all the time as of late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 885

You deserved it 216

Same thing different taste

Spooky season has begun

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