Transportation, Cars, Accident and Animals: Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows...

By Anonymous - 08/08/2012 05:59 - United States

Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 204

You deserved it 2 848

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Same thing different taste

By Wellthisishawkward - 14/08/2015 22:40 - United States

Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 742

You deserved it 2 902

By andrea99 - 03/10/2010 09:35 - United States

Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 663

You deserved it 3 416

By questionmark707 - 12/04/2012 23:53 - United States - Fullerton

Today, while driving my car near a farm, I hit a man on the side of the road. I started freaking out and got out of the car to help him. It was then that I found out that I'd hit a scarecrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 343

You deserved it 7 280

By nothingisreal69 - 01/03/2011 22:21 - Reserved

Today, as I was driving home from work, a bird decided to commit suicide by flying in front of my car. The shock caused me to slam on the brakes, totaling three other cars in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 309

You deserved it 13 363

Alexa, play "A Forest" by The Cure

By JesusLaidAnEgg - 10/09/2019 14:02

Today, I was driving around my campsite at dark in the middle of a forest. My father thought it would be funny to run up to my window, put his face against the glass and scream. I drove into a tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 598

You deserved it 249

Flying around

By jdancerchick - 16/11/2011 13:47 - United States

Today, while driving and singing, I noticed a large fly inside my car. I stopped singing so it wouldn't fly into my mouth. That didn't stop it from flying up my nose, causing me to swerve and drive into a ditch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 257

You deserved it 4 712

Irony at a base level

By danyelicindereli - 29/05/2009 03:41 - United States

Today, I was standing around looking out the window at work when it became really dark and windy and started to pour. I watched a shopping cart fly across the parking lot thinking how funny it'd be if it hit someone's car. It hit mine. I need a new headlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 254

You deserved it 48 187

By newly passed, newly grassed - 06/12/2014 17:04 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, while driving home, I swerved to avoid turning a duck and her babies into roadkill. Another car was coming around a sharp bend at the time and swerved to avoid hitting me. In the end, we both ran our cars off the road, and he took out several ducks in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 130

You deserved it 8 397

Clever

By FMLTIMESTWO - 10/06/2009 04:36 - United States

Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 557

You deserved it 61 972

By Anna - 15/06/2012 09:43 - United States - Buellton

Today, I was driving my parrot home from the vet. As I was driving home, I decided to let her sit on my shoulder. Something scared her, and she started flapping in my face, causing me to crash my car into a tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 770

You deserved it 51 776

ObsceneOblivion 4

Wednesday 8 August 2012 12:01

Owls have better eyesight than humans when it's dark. Maybe it was saving you from something out there :)

jellycorn 13

Wednesday 8 August 2012 12:01

Hedwig?

Comments

yupperz23 4

Wednesday 8 August 2012 21:58

Brakes?

outoftown 26

Wednesday 8 August 2012 22:08

OP, hope you're OK and your car insurance agent is a Harry Potter fan.

inomyabc 5

Wednesday 8 August 2012 22:36

A letter from Hogwarts.

BlackBlazeCobra 16

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:01

Maybe it was trying to deliver your Hogwarts acceptance letter?

Skymone 6

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:11

Aw, someone already mentioned Harry Potter owls :( But I bet it was just a Daily Prophet being delivered to the wrong address :)

KiddNYC1O 20

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:26

Mayhem!

thallpma08 4

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:50

This exact same ha happened to me.

Zehla 7

Thursday 9 August 2012 0:50

Seems like that owl didn't give a hoot about your country drive.

__mcgeeski 4

Thursday 9 August 2012 3:18

Lmfao, is all I can really say to this.

JesseJimenez 4

Thursday 9 August 2012 3:49

Are you okay?

Keywords

Family Miscellaneous Cats DIY Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 061

You deserved it 409

Today, I was wearing my yoga pants for my boyfriend. He's infatuated with them. He claims they make my ass look nice. I found out it's because I constantly get a camel toe, and it gives him a semi every time he sees it. I found this out by listening to him and his father at dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 980

You deserved it 10 418

The Top

Today, I just spent half an hour cleaning up my little brother's puke after he got drunk for the first time. All the people who bought him drinks are still out partying and having a good time, while all I can smell is whiskey, Chinese food, and whatever else was in his stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 625

You deserved it 3 111

Today, I got a letter summoning me to court for leaving the scene of a car accident I had in London. I live in Manchester and don't own a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 926

You deserved it 107

Today, I was admonished by a supermarket cashier because my mask had slipped below my nose. So had hers, actually. FML

I agree, your life sucks 700

You deserved it 381

Today, I somehow managed to get the guy I like to sign up for Grindr. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 001

You deserved it 815

Today, I went shopping with my two-year-old nephew. He threw a tantrum in the middle of the store because I would not show him my "boobies". A man came up to us and said I should do what my nephew wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 623

You deserved it 4 140

Today, my mom wants to save money on both heating and electricity. Put into practice, this means that the temperature in my room is about the same as that in our fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 90