By Anonymous - 25/04/2013 15:10 - Canada - Midland

Spicy
Today, I was excited for my first date in a while, with a "tall handsome business man." Turns out he "doesn't feel emotions anymore", likes getting peed on, and "doesn't do condoms." Thanks, internet dating. FML
I agree, your life sucks 58 969
You deserved it 15 334

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You just have to understand Internet dating lingo. "Tall handsome man" means "short ugly freak". "Hot blonde" means at least 350 pounds. And when they actually admit to being freaky, run.

lhazz11 23

Sounds like he wouldn't need to worry about the condoms, he isn't getting laid anyways.

Comments

At least you got a good story out of it. Ask your guy friends if they know any good guys for you

Urine trouble if you think a stream of pee puns aren't coming. I mean, I am with you in that pee puns piss me off as well. But, some peeple just want to watch the world get pissed on.

sailorzoe 14

He sounds like a masterpeeice.

VasilisaUzhasnaj 29

He should date someone with crones disease.. ( or is it chromes? However it's spelled)

Oh my god, don't get me started on Crone's Disease. I swear, I was with those witches ONE TIME and they infected me. Now whenever I laugh, I start cackling, and when I cook, I have the urge to use a cauldron and quote spells. I'm lots of fun at Halloween though.

monnanon 13

it is spelt crohns but what has that got to do with the FML crohns is a gut problem.

hooligyn123 18

So because he likes being peed on he should have unprotected sex with someone who suffers from constant stomach pain diarrhea, vomiting, nausea, and skin rashes? To clarify: No I'm not saying Crohn's is contagious.

Xatraris 38

How exactly would Chrohn's benefit them? Constantly being in the bathroom, in pain, ******** has nothing to do with his interests.

@ #38 crohn's disease isn't something that can be given to someone by another person. you have to inherit it. that witch gave you an STD stupid.

maimengming 10

Coming from someone who has Crohn's, and has studied it in my physiology class, I can say that there is no way that it has anything to do with him liking to be peed on. Crohn's is an irritable bowel disease. I honestly don't understand how this has anything to do with his interest in pee.

Crohn's disease can cause nearly uncontrollable urination at times.. My grandma has it lol

maimengming 10

My father has had it for years, and I have a extremely severe case with every possible symptom I have ever known to be possible. I have yet to find out about a symptom I haven't had. I can tell you, from having it, studying it in depth in class, and talking to my doctor many times, no. Crohn's disease doesn't cause issues with the bladder like that. It is in the digestive system, not the urinary tract.

melacortez 11

Twisted Version Of Fifty Shades Should Of Asked If He Had A Contract

Screw it, I don't care if I'm poisoned, because in the games of puns... If urine it, urine it to win it!

umm u r not supposed to have sex on the first date hun

OP can have sex whenever she wants (with a consenting adult). Also given the creep factor of the guy I'd bet this came up in casual conversation.

Ultimate_No 7

I know it sounds weird, but usually when people date they hope it goes past the first date. Crazy, I know. Just try to wrap your mind around it.