Intimacy: Today, I was having sex with a girl. While we were fooling around,... - FML

By Brett meek - 19/02/2010 07:41 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with a girl. While we were fooling around, she started squeezing my cheeks and told me I remind her of her son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 607

You deserved it 3 640

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Same thing different taste

Awkward

By Jeremy - 07/08/2009 02:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was getting it on with a girl I've been talking to for three months. She's a year younger than me and it was her first time. So, I went easy. After five minutes she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said that I reminded her of her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 424

You deserved it 7 422

By lovely - 19/12/2011 06:43 - Netherlands

Spicy

Today, while having sex, my girlfriend suddenly broke down and started crying. Apparently, when I'm horny, my face reminds her of her dead dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 573

You deserved it 4 588

Not now

By Anonymous - 08/09/2009 04:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she looked up at me and said, "You look a lot like your brother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 204

You deserved it 2 623

Creeped out

By shawty - 22/08/2010 12:14 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I heard my mother and father having sexual intercourse, and I found out that my mother moans the same way as my girlfriend. Guess who I now think about every time my girlfriend moans? FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 192

You deserved it 6 469

By ohgod... - 02/04/2012 02:18 - Canada - Magog

Spicy

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 188

You deserved it 3 432

Bad sign

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 01:28 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 857

You deserved it 6 269

By arctic1 - 27/05/2009 09:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 327

You deserved it 68 710

Comeback

By sadguy - 18/02/2009 22:07 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with a girl I really like for the first time. After a while I told her I was about to come. Her response, "Lucky you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 116

You deserved it 23 255

By Darin Greenwood - 22/07/2019 14:00

Spicy

Today, the wife and I were in the middle of having sex. She was bent over and I was taking her to pound town. I look over to see my 3 year-old son standing in the doorway, humping air. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 373

You deserved it 2 477

By eeh - 07/05/2009 14:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 643

You deserved it 103 460

Next

Top comments

xXEurekaXx 0

Friday 19 February 2010 16:08

that is disturbing...

Domonator 16

Friday 19 February 2010 16:29

Face cheeks or butt cheeks?

Comments

atreides_fml 0

Friday 19 February 2010 18:19

hahaha you should started yelling out mommy during it all lmao that'll disturb it worse... unless she got into it...

xwoahxcherryx 0

Friday 19 February 2010 18:21

ew, that's disturbing x's 2.

kitty_f 3

Friday 19 February 2010 18:42

she is weeeeired

Sosco 0

Friday 19 February 2010 18:43

that is legitamately ****** up.

forever2009 0

Friday 19 February 2010 18:45

lmao Wtf

EmoNinja 0

Friday 19 February 2010 18:45

that's gross

NeNiTa14 0

Friday 19 February 2010 18:48

Whoa. Didn't see that coming huh? lmao that's disgusting o_0

x3selly 0

Friday 19 February 2010 19:42

you guys are retarded, she probably saying he has a BABY BUTT, as in his butt reminds him of her babies butt, mom DO change there babies butts you know, but it's still weird to say during sex. haha

russiansolja 0

Friday 19 February 2010 20:22

Hahaha damn milfs

bigpapi210 0

Friday 19 February 2010 20:23

I don't know if that's hot or not? I have issues lol

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I brought home my new boyfriend, who happens to have an eyepatch. Despite repeatedly telling them not to, even threatening punishment, my daughters, ages 9 and 11, would not stop calling him "Cyclops." He’s mad at me for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 055

You deserved it 365

Today, I noticed a flashy car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 623

You deserved it 42 687

The Top

Today, my dad trusted me to go driving by myself in his car. I foolishly celebrated by doing a jump heel click, landed awkwardly, threw my hand out to stop myself falling, and scraped the whole bunch of keys down the driver's door. He trusted me for like 3 seconds and I blew it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 300

You deserved it 1 430

Today, I found out that my son set up a telescope in the attic not so he could study astronomy like he told me, but so he could spy on the girl across the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 660

You deserved it 7 269

Today, I got excited when my cell phone lit up because I hadn't received a single phone call all day. Turns out it was the "low battery" indicator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 885

You deserved it 11 440

Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 047

You deserved it 49 651

Today, my car was broken into. They broke the passenger side window and took my radio system. But they didn't take the remote for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 645

You deserved it 2 352

Today, I had to find simple words to explain to the idiot I was tutoring that "1/4" is not of a greater value than "1/3" just because the denominator is bigger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 538

You deserved it 5 571