Love: Today, I was hit by a car. I called my girlfriend from the hospital... - FML

By man - 08/05/2009 21:46 - United States

Today, I was hit by a car. I called my girlfriend from the hospital and asked her if she could pick me up. She responded by saying "Fuck you, you aways tell me what to do!" and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 373

You deserved it 10 388

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Same thing different taste

By noname - 18/02/2013 01:28 - United States - Middletown

Today, after being in the hospital for 2 weeks after emergency abdominal surgery, my girlfriend, who didn't even bother to ask how I was, made me hobble to her house just to dump me and send me straight back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 191

You deserved it 3 050

By Tom - 25/11/2010 13:28

Today, a car hit me. I didn't get hurt, but someone called 911. The old woman who had hit me got out of the car with no problem to look at me, and gets back into the car. When the police arrive, she pulls out crutches and said I made strange faces and made her hit me. I got blamed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 181

You deserved it 2 587

By kicking me while I'm LITERALLY down - 07/11/2017 05:00

Today, I was hit by a car while riding my bike, so I called my dad for help. He blamed me for the accident, said he wasn't sure what I wanted him to do, and suggested I call my mom instead. She isn't picking up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 622

You deserved it 289

By Anonymous - 06/11/2015 20:47 - Poland - Warsaw

Today, my roommate called me, but she's a cunt so I ignored her. A few hours later, I found out her mom and dad were in a serious car accident and she needed a ride to go see them at the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 003

You deserved it 32 273

STFU

By annoyedguy - 30/06/2009 11:20 - United States

Today, my girlfriend missed our date, so I angrily texted her, telling her if she can't make our dates then we should break up, and generally telling her off. Five minutes later I get a picture of her sleeping in a hospital bed from her mother, saying, "Shut the fuck up, she had appendicitis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 457

You deserved it 96 712

By Somethingtoworryabout - 26/10/2018 22:00

Today, I couldn't help but laugh at my girlfriend because she always becomes paranoid when she's around cars. I found her reaction cute and told her that "there's nothing to worry about". A car ran over me two hours later. I'm in a hospital now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 648

You deserved it 836

By wwasmer - 27/02/2009 17:43 - United States

Today, I hit a car while trying to answer a phone call from my mom. I quickly answered the phone and shouted "What!?". To which she replied, "I just had a bad feeling in my gut about you so I wanted to make sure you were ok." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 875

You deserved it 16 940

By nolips - 19/11/2009 15:53 - Norway

Today, my girlfriend woke up very early in terrible pain. I drove her to the hospital and fell asleep in the waiting area. When I woke up, my car was gone and it was 9am. She had assumed I just walked home (32 miles), so she took the car. I was the only one in the waiting area. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 056

You deserved it 3 163

By michelle91 - 02/12/2009 11:36 - Malaysia

Today, while stepping out of the shower, I slipped and cut my head. I went to the hospital, got 8 stitches and was tested for head trauma. After hours of ignoring my calls and texts, my girlfriend finally responded, very angrily. Why? Today is her birthday, and I "selfishly made it about me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 129

You deserved it 4 155

Thanks, guys

By Sophie - 27/12/2011 04:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I got hit by a car. My friends left me to get to the hospital myself. The cab was double fare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 131

You deserved it 2 475

Next

Top comments

cinnamania 3

Saturday 9 May 2009 2:52

Oh, wow. She's lovely.

Luckster 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 2:59

Bitches like that make me ashamed to be a woman. Time for her to become an Ex. I hope you're well!

Comments

Phishyz 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:00

I would call that a relationSHIT!

vgmaster 0

Monday 7 June 2010 8:36

^^ win!!!

maxibenji 0

Friday 3 September 2010 2:20

lol

LilKonvicted 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:02

Maybe its that time of the month? XD

brydeec 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:03

Wow, she sounds like a total bitch. Curbstomp her the next time you see her.

Rainbow_Monkey 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:03

On the one hand, you seem to be dating a heartless bitch. On the other hand, she probably had a point and maybe you should stop telling her what to do...

Always_And_Never 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:03

That sucks man, I hope one of your buds picked you up.

nixnix 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:04

LOL@#11....sounds like my relationSHIT!!!!!

foreverisabelx3 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:05

#11 FTW!

JFox 8

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:06

Well, she's perfectly sane..

Juli_fml 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:06

did she realize you had been a patient?

drybamboo 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 3:07

I have a feeling you kind of deserve it. One wonders what you did to her to receive such a response.

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The Top

Today, on my first day as a community support officer, a 7-foot meathead in the middle of a domestic argument told me to “piss off shorty”, and when I asked him not to swear at me, he picked me up one-handed and threw me in a builder's skip full of mud and wet cement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 559

You deserved it 351

Today, my girlfriend’s dad has a sword he inherited from his dad that he claims links their family to the old Swiss nobility. I work in a museum so I know most of the makers' marks on swords, so I’m not sure how to tell him his sword is a reproduction made in Spain less than 100 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 79

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 172

You deserved it 576

Today, I'm so afraid of Covid, I lied to my friends to avoid hanging out with them every time I was invited. Yes, I've been vaccinated already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 528

You deserved it 1 342

Today, it's my last week working at a gas station. A fat middle-aged man threw a hissy over the price of 2-liter Coke and demanded I change it. I asked him to leave; he wouldn't, and forced me to call the cops. He stormed out as I was on the phone, pointed at me, and called me a "weak piece of shit". Three more days… FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 114

Today, as I struggle with dyscalculia, I set up some counters so I could knit up a perfect square. Turns out the counters actually made it worse. I have three failed attempts and I'm stuck on number 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 718

You deserved it 103

I really don't understand why...

I agree, your life sucks 254

You deserved it 135

Today, my class went for a hike through the woods near our school to destress during finals. While walking downhill towards the edge of the lake, I tripped and tumbled down the hill, and ended up diving head first into the lake. I had to hike back to the school soaking wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 693

You deserved it 1 276