Love: Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched...

By filipinoclari808 - 16/04/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 797

You deserved it 81 441

Carnival of Disasters
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Same thing different taste

It was an accident!

By innocent - 06/01/2014 21:32 - Australia

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 029

You deserved it 7 508

Power move

By Anonymous - 30/09/2019 22:02

Today, I was walking my girlfriend to class when my friend came by and playfully punched me in the arm. Trying not to look like a wimp, I turned around to hit him in the arm. Instead, I ended up punching a girl in the face. Now my girlfriend won't talk to me and I'm suspended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 1 787

By hero to zero - 04/07/2011 16:09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 136

You deserved it 15 190

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 077

You deserved it 5 419

By joe - 31/01/2009 23:14 - United States

Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 718

You deserved it 26 849

By Anonymous - 21/10/2014 15:49 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 823

You deserved it 7 808

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 828

You deserved it 135

By goddamitme - 21/02/2009 19:23 - United States

Today, My girlfriend came from behind me and put her hand in my back pockets. I though it was someone trying to take my wallet, I elbowed her in the nose and broke it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 141

You deserved it 12 933

By Anonymous - 18/09/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 393

You deserved it 4 444

By Karate Kid - 25/05/2012 06:29 - Australia - Surry Hills

Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 972

You deserved it 35 384

RichHurtz 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 16:09

Someone taps you so you roundhouse kick them? What are you, an idiot?

rw4rf1s 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 16:07

FLAWLESS VICTORY

Comments

quesoking 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 20:54

i would of flash kicked her, and then whipped out the sonic BOOM on the way down.

chuck_norris_jr 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 21:02

thankfully you are not chuck norris, or she would be dead by now. but chuck never kicks women, so you suck.

rabidbacon 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 21:07

FINISH HER!

eternalaphrodite 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 21:14

1. - You are not Chuck Norris. 2. - If she is worth being with, a simple apology (at most) is sufficient to take care of this. She might even laugh it off - I would.

nebjamin69 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 21:15

You're either a douche bag, or a douche bag with 'roid rage....

rukusrazor 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 21:17

Shoulda said "Bitch! You understand the words that are comin' outta my mouf?" Also sounds like you and your friends play a lot of slap-ass. Sure you meant girlfriend and not the more likely boyfriend?