Kids: Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter....

By Bailey - 22/08/2010 06:58 - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

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By Embarassed - 18/10/2024 20:00 - United States - Cleveland

Today, my toddler started chirping, "Mommy’s on the toilet!" while I was in a public restroom at our local mall. She also knocked on the stall door to make sure everyone was made aware of our exact location. FML

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By SadDad - 06/03/2009 01:51 - United States

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

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Paper-thin walls

By Lauren Davies - 17/09/2019 06:00

Today, I had to tell my 4 year-old, "I'm wiping my butt right now, I can't get you a drink. Please wait a minute." I distinctly heard my neighbor laughing through the bathroom window. FML

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Bathroom menace

By Shelly - 07/06/2009 02:25 - United States

Today, I used the restroom at a department store. While I was in my stall, I overheard a little girl say to her mother, "I see someone wearing pink!" I remembered that I was wearing pink just as she finished her thought, "…and she's pooping." She was peeking at me through the stall. FML

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Not now!

By Anonymous - 20/09/2009 05:01 - United States

Today, I was in a department store with my three year old daughter to buy some new jeans. I took her into the dressing room with me and as I began to take off my pants she yells, "Mommy, you can't go peepee in here!!" I am no longer welcome in that particular store. FML

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Check this out!

By Anonymous - 10/08/2015 00:37 - United States - Plano

Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML

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Amplified

By Anonymous - 01/09/2010 23:04 - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

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You deserved it 4 373

By Fido - 06/06/2016 11:58 - United States

Today, my 3-year-old girl accidentally caught sight of me stepping out of the shower. Now she thinks "daddy has a tail" and she just has to let everyone know about it. FML

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You deserved it 1 545

Public announcement

By Pissed - 05/10/2011 15:29 - Australia

Today, in an incredibly busy shopping center bathroom with my 5 year-old niece, I was squatting over the toilet seat to avoid germs. My niece then says at the top of her voice, "Auntie, why are you sitting like a kangaroo?" I'd say the whole room pissed their pants laughing. FML

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You deserved it 8 425

By birdisnottheword - 11/03/2015 13:55 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

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You deserved it 8 895

cartez2gs 3

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:05

ahahahhahaa. pwned by your child. shave your furry beaver. lol

collegegirl87 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 17:07

omg just because her child says it was a beard does not mean she has a jungle. children don't have any hair so of course they are going to be surprised. FYL and you don't need to shave 

Comments

shihtzupup98 3

Monday 23 August 2010 2:36

Mona looks whory

lone_wolf81 0

Monday 23 August 2010 3:18

u must shave before u take her with u again :p

big_smucker 0

Monday 23 August 2010 3:37

yeah, if your vag looks like it has a gotee its time to shave that bitch.

kosoveshqip 0

Monday 23 August 2010 4:32

omg wow i have nothing to say

adorkable_spazz 0

Monday 23 August 2010 4:46

XD that's hilarious!

Poster_Pastry 0

Monday 23 August 2010 5:36

YDI for bringing your 4 year old in the bathroom with you...

jblover1234 0

Monday 23 August 2010 5:44

thats what waxes are for. :)

lmfaoooooooooo 4

Monday 23 August 2010 6:00

SorchaR 0

Monday 23 August 2010 6:13

See, I would've laughed if it had happened to me. Little kids are going to embarrass you - you have to have a sense of humor about it. My son once stopped in the middle of the feminine hygiene aisle in the store and wouldn't move until I told him what these things were for. And "they're things for big ladies" wasn't cutting it. I don't know who was more amused, me or the other people on the aisle. Also, you people saying she needs to wax or trim are idiots. Not everyone is ashamed of having pubic hair.

Kawaiichan42 3

Monday 23 August 2010 6:33

204, you're exactly right. I'm guessing that with a four year old, Op doesn't have a lot of time to herself and can think of much more pleasant things to do with it. I know when my sisters were smaller, my mom had to wake up early just to get a shower and shave her legs in. Also, once you've reached a certain point in your relationship (I'm assuming Op and her child's father have been together for a long enough time that it really doesn't matter much) things like shaving become a chore.