Kids: Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter....

By Bailey - 22/08/2010 06:58 - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

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You deserved it 14 094

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By Embarassed - 18/10/2024 20:00 - United States - Cleveland

Today, my toddler started chirping, "Mommy’s on the toilet!" while I was in a public restroom at our local mall. She also knocked on the stall door to make sure everyone was made aware of our exact location. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 124

By SadDad - 06/03/2009 01:51 - United States

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 317

You deserved it 4 358

Paper-thin walls

By Lauren Davies - 17/09/2019 06:00

Today, I had to tell my 4 year-old, "I'm wiping my butt right now, I can't get you a drink. Please wait a minute." I distinctly heard my neighbor laughing through the bathroom window. FML

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You deserved it 319

Bathroom menace

By Shelly - 07/06/2009 02:25 - United States

Today, I used the restroom at a department store. While I was in my stall, I overheard a little girl say to her mother, "I see someone wearing pink!" I remembered that I was wearing pink just as she finished her thought, "…and she's pooping." She was peeking at me through the stall. FML

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You deserved it 3 453

Not now!

By Anonymous - 20/09/2009 05:01 - United States

Today, I was in a department store with my three year old daughter to buy some new jeans. I took her into the dressing room with me and as I began to take off my pants she yells, "Mommy, you can't go peepee in here!!" I am no longer welcome in that particular store. FML

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You deserved it 3 864

Check this out!

By Anonymous - 10/08/2015 00:37 - United States - Plano

Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 812

You deserved it 2 556

Amplified

By Anonymous - 01/09/2010 23:04 - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 585

You deserved it 4 373

By Fido - 06/06/2016 11:58 - United States

Today, my 3-year-old girl accidentally caught sight of me stepping out of the shower. Now she thinks "daddy has a tail" and she just has to let everyone know about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 488

You deserved it 1 545

Public announcement

By Pissed - 05/10/2011 15:29 - Australia

Today, in an incredibly busy shopping center bathroom with my 5 year-old niece, I was squatting over the toilet seat to avoid germs. My niece then says at the top of her voice, "Auntie, why are you sitting like a kangaroo?" I'd say the whole room pissed their pants laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 739

You deserved it 8 425

By birdisnottheword - 11/03/2015 13:55 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 936

You deserved it 8 895

cartez2gs 3

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:05

ahahahhahaa. pwned by your child. shave your furry beaver. lol

collegegirl87 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 17:07

omg just because her child says it was a beard does not mean she has a jungle. children don't have any hair so of course they are going to be surprised. FYL and you don't need to shave 

Comments

limegreenpoopie 31

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:10

awww man lol xD

rxmazing 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:11

LMFAO that's so funny, you need to shave though...

BobbyXXX 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:13

ydi it for having a beard on your peepee

mattman1994 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 18:33

Hahaha! That was funny

mspencer809 3

Sunday 22 August 2010 18:41

89- I love your eyes. lol, just sayin'.

ugwmii 0

Monday 23 August 2010 8:57

mistyic blueee. I got blue eyes too we got so much in common my brother

hairt 4

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:16

HAHhHa she will grow up to have one soon :p

cheekywench 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:17

Wax is a beautiful thing.....

ArtIsResistance7 1

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:19

Should of told her about the pussy troll that lives down there... THAT would of shut her up.

NoelLikesBirds 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:19

Tell her a little gnome named Peter lives in your slacks and he left his razor at the Holiday Inn so he's unable to remove his facial bush.

mockingjay_fml 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:24

HAHAHA

taz1 1

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:24

This is a complete ripoff of a story that was on MLIA a few days ago, only they weren't in public

nyc718 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:25

hows about shaving that thing? no respectable man wants hair in his teeth after going down.

NoelLikesBirds 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:27

Does anyone else wish he hadn't said that, with a baby on his lap...?

ohmgitsme 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 16:34

haha thats what I was thinking.

lifeinhd 3

Sunday 22 August 2010 17:01

I'm pretty sure it was the baby who said that.

lshelby94 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 18:09

I was thinking the same thing

Kawaiichan42 3

Sunday 22 August 2010 18:30

Look, dude, not every woman can shave down there. I have massively sensitive skin and am only able to shave my legs because lotion was invented. The skin there is so sensitive that it does nothing but itch. I trim, but shaving/waxing is out of the question.