Miscellaneous: Today, I was in the toilet when somebody started banging on the...

By thisisbad - 12/10/2009 14:21 - Malaysia

Today, I was in the toilet when somebody started banging on the door loudly. I panicked and immediately cleaned my self and opened the door. As I opened the door, my brother vomited all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 996

You deserved it 2 789

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Same thing different taste

Little shit

By Anonymous - 31/12/2022 18:00 - United States - Fpo

Today, I took my brother to the bathroom at a restaurant. The stall next to mine was locked, so I assumed he was still in there. I yelled his name a few times, then banged on the door out of annoyance. I gave up and returned to the table, where he was sitting with a grin. Turns out I just traumatized a poor lady in the stall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 391

By thanksbro - 28/09/2009 00:10 - United States

Today, I came home from school and ran to the nearest bathroom to go #2. In my hurry, I forgot to shut the door so I asked my older brother who was walking by to close it for me. After a while he didn't respond, so I looked up to see not my brother, but his best friend watching me take a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 846

You deserved it 20 580

You OK in there?

By stinkypants - 10/11/2011 03:15 - India

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 788

You deserved it 11 866

By FullMonty - 15/09/2012 23:26 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 078

You deserved it 3 995

By beccabooyah - 20/11/2011 00:52 - United States

Today, I was using the bathroom and checking Facebook on my phone. As I'm checking my newsfeed, I noticed a new photo upload by my brother. I guess I forgot to properly shut the door to the bathroom, because it's me on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 744

You deserved it 38 699

We could be heroes

By OhPleaseNo - 07/04/2020 14:00 - OhPleaseNo

Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 711

You deserved it 204

By whymyroomthough - 06/08/2014 22:18 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 201

You deserved it 3 230

Freakout

By Anonymous - 09/05/2014 22:03 - South Africa

Today, I woke up to a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I jumped out of bed in panic and rushed into the bathroom, only to see my sister limping around in the nude. She'd just jumped out of the shower because someone had flushed the toilet downstairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 334

You deserved it 4 322

By not a shitty situation so fuck you - 24/06/2016 22:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, in a public toilet, I got to experience a guy high out of his mind kicking in my locked stall door and puking all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 851

You deserved it 773

By Anonymous - 31/10/2009 19:40 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 774

You deserved it 6 758

OuchThatsHarsh 0

Monday 12 October 2009 20:02

How in the world did you fit in the toilet?

mickeyroxsox 2

Thursday 10 February 2011 7:21

it's called a joke. get a clue.

Comments

ROFLDOCTOR 1

Tuesday 13 October 2009 1:20

Lawl. If my sister did that to me I probably would have barfed right back on her and proceeded to yell about how there are other sinks, a whole 'nother bathroom, and a ton of freaking garbage cans she could have used. Sucks to know you had to rush just so you could be puked on. FYL. D:

beans248 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 3:27

lmao. you were IN the toilet? should have just told them to wait and for that extra few seconds they would have puked on the door.

cdessert1995 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 3:35

so what exactly were you doing in the toilet?

Allymeme 3

Tuesday 13 October 2009 3:55

You were in the toilet? I picked You deserved it just because you said that.

electroboy_fml 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 19:52

Hooray for racism!

chowyuk 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 4:27

is it posible to bang quietly?

ChronicFAIL 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 20:47

Of course it is. Me and my girlfriend bang quietly whenever her dad is asleep in the next room :)

PlasmaWafflez 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 4:29

Why the **** were you IN the toilet??!!!

_20jre 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 6:53

There is a typo... Today, I was masturbating in the toilet when somebody started banging on the door loudly. I panicked and immediately cleaned my self and opened the door. As I opened the door, my brother vomited all over me. FML