By f*ckingdisgusted - 27/08/2011 01:13 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

zcheema17 0

Lol! Don't go snoop around her stuff! But that is weird...

410 39

Comments

ifailplzinsultme 0

Well I get that your curious about your daughter but that's privite stuff on her laptop. You don't go snooping if you don't want to find out bad stuff. But I will admit that's a little odd. Neither FYL or YDI.

36 6
BoredomCentral 8

I believe the word you're looking for is "private".

2 10
ifailplzinsultme 0

I believe the sentence I'm looking for now is "I don't give a shit"

11 0
DncrHap 9

meh. she's sixteen, and that's past the time teens start thinking about having sex with other people. be happy she's exploring her sexuality through writing, and not, you know, actually having sex (granted, she could also be actually having sex. but for the sake of argument, let's say she's not). at the same time, you are her father, and it would be weird to find anything sexual on her computer. twilight-related or not. my sympathies.

74 5
MarioDragon 14

So she's into necrophilia and **********, let her be how she's happy.

46 3
heresIsaac 4

OP, don't think we don't know about your 1000 word Harry Potter sex fantasy

66 2
MsMeiriona 2

No, Harry Dresden. Even more fun.

2 8
Rantarm 4

VIBRATICUS!!! *wand starts buzzing, followed by loud, bestial, man-like moaning. Harry and Ron look horrified and simultaneously utter: uhhhhh, hermiony?

5 0
MsMeiriona 2

Get the kid a present. A good book. I suggest the Dresden Files.

8 19
ifailplzinsultme 0

I suggest a can of whop ass

5 0
RaaabbleRabble 0

I ******* love the Dresden files. Those books are amazing.

2 2
MsMeiriona 2

Harry Dresden can show her how you deal with vampires and werewolves, also how having sex with them ends up getting your entire life destroyed, including everyone you cared about. Life lessons!

0 1
MsMeiriona 2

Re-education is still possible at that age. Giving decent literature is a start. And if that fails, the hardcovers do make a handy bludgeon.

0 1
Bleachfan_fml 0

Hey, XKCD for the profile pic. Nice. Also, for some things along those lines Darren Shan does some good YA stuff like that without sex. But if you like a good fantasy novel, I suggest the Twilight Reign series, by Tom Lloyd. Really good book, in my opinion.

0 0
kickazz16 15

I'd birch slap her for watching twilight. Shame in you, give her some Harry potter.

36 20
yummylicious 5

Back where I come from, we call it bitch slapping, not birch slapping.

17 2
MsMeiriona 2

No, see, you get a nice branch from a birch tree, and you beat their ass with it. Hence birch slapping.

35 1
HannahJoButtons 2

Birch slaps are the WORST! Anything but a birch slap!!!

8 1
stephy8687 0

Where I come from it's (shame on you)...

0 2
mikaylajarvis 0

that BS Harry potter so freaking gay wth dude

0 1
hahalaughing 0

its great you call your own daughter a freak, asshole.

87 15
koolkat27 13

calm down, it was joke. if you can't take jokes, there's no reason to be on FML.

5 27
shadowPlayer 6

Kind of cruel that you judge your daughter that harsh.

62 10