Kids: Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we...

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By Dang-ItsDanielle - 07/03/2009 18:28 - United States

Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we call our "under doggie push": I throw her up in the air while I run underneath her before she hits me coming back down. I walked away to get my water and she yelled across the park "Can we do it doggie-style again?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 365

You deserved it 19 431

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Same thing different taste

By BabyButt - 09/04/2014 17:50 - United States - Honolulu

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend to our local park, and I playfully climbed into one of the baby swings. I planned on having him push me, not getting stuck and having to be cut free from the seat while he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 626

You deserved it 41 598

Straight to jail

By anon - 15/07/2011 01:51 - United States

Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 003

You deserved it 70 977

By Pisser - 26/06/2014 04:57 - United States - Portland

Today, my sweet 7-month-old puppy ran up to a big fat dog at the park and did what she always does: roll over on her back to start to play. The big fat dog lifted his leg and peed all over my puppy's belly. After the shock, my soaking wet puppy jumped on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 191

You deserved it 5 725

By Jack00412 - 08/07/2014 19:55 - United States - Montague

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year-old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 310

You deserved it 5 540

By geli - 09/08/2016 00:12

Today, while at the public swimming pool, I gave my 2-year-old daughter a piggy back ride in the pool. We were having fun until I realized she had untied my swim top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 784

You deserved it 1 451

By lolmyfduplife - 24/12/2015 06:10

Today, I put my 5 month-old daughter in her swinging chair and walked into the kitchen to make her a bottle. When I came back, she was giggling because the dog was licking her face. It would have been cute, picture worthy even, if I actually had a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 699

You deserved it 2 097

By uterurist - 22/11/2014 18:37 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 863

You deserved it 2 922

By kids say the darnedest things - 19/07/2014 02:56 - United States - Denver

Today, my 3-year-old daughter asked me to carry her from the car to the house. I asked her for 3 kisses and a hug in return. She said she'd rather walk instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 304

You deserved it 7 136

By Anonymous - 12/01/2012 18:41 - United Kingdom

Today, I spun a two year old upside down, in circles. She wasn't remotely dizzy. I threw up on myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 621

You deserved it 11 080

Beast Mode

By Vee - 24/09/2017 07:00 - United States

Today, my 80lb black lab decided that the moment I start doing pushups is her cue to mount me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 218

You deserved it 437

FML_allthetime 0

Saturday 7 March 2009 23:36

hahahaha! thats pretty great! if i were another parent in the park, i would be concerned...

Recon_fml 0

Sunday 8 March 2009 0:26

This was a much needed laugh for the day Thanks! My wife and I do it doggy style all the time. I sit up and beg, she rolls over and plays dead. :P

Comments

cherrytunez 0

Monday 9 March 2009 7:32

a 4-year-old asking for a doggie-style? that's hilarious!

LiLOnE 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 0:37

wow that funni it probably scared other people though

cheerup4lifesux 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 2:19

Aw, that's more harmless. That's so cute though. The other parents would probably understand, lol.

xxmsp91 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 7:48

hahahahha thats cute.

MissKerryxX 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 23:41

hahahaha thats pretty funny i bet you laughed!

inlimbo11 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 23:40

look at it this way, at least your her MOTHER.

FAKEinternetNAME 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 5:34

hahahahahahaha this is TOTALLY an FML... Imagine if your kid screamed that!!! I'm sure everyone in the area figured out what the girl meant... but the initial shock of having a 4-year-old scream that... PRICELESS!!! kids say the darndest things!

Maltastic 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 9:48

Reminds me of Kids say the Darnedest things. I would have been embarrassed if I were you, cracking up if I were someone else. Try a new name. xD

mechanicalrain 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 4:31

my parents loved to tell a story to my boyfriend about how when i was little, my aunti was babysitting me and gave me a wedgie. i screamed and as my parents walked in the door, i ran to my mom and yelled, "Mommy, aunti gave me a woody!" we dont date anymore, and now his friends all laugh at me when they see me... but i dont take it personal, i think its hilarious. just comes with being a kid... XD