Animals: Today, I was riding a new horse when a lawnmower starting up...

By Anonymous - 10/04/2013 09:06 - United States

Today, I was riding a new horse when a lawnmower starting up spooked her. She jumped straight up in the air and I landed directly on the saddle horn. I can't walk or feel anything between my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 997

You deserved it 4 224

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/06/2015 15:23 - United States - Austin

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 249

You deserved it 5 529

By Anonymous - 11/09/2009 14:48 - Canada

Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 192

You deserved it 6 801

By mishyb - 28/07/2013 04:28 - United States - Englewood

Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 481

You deserved it 4 347

Horsing around

By Anonymous - 15/07/2020 20:02

Today, my horse, who has been nothing but gentle for 27 years, kicked me right in the knee on my last vacation day. It's so bad, I can hardly sleep or sit down on the toilet. Tomorrow I go back to work, which involves lots of walking, sitting down and getting back up, as well as lifting heavy stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 760

You deserved it 206

Goodbye horses

By Not Again! - 14/06/2019 04:16

Today, while riding a massive draft horse, the horse thought it would be fun to walk under a very low apple tree that sat level with his back. A branch hit me and made me fall off onto a coil of barbed wire, twisting my ankle in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 745

You deserved it 374

By Lizziebelle - 01/12/2016 08:07 - United States - Seattle

Today, my horse learned a new acrobatic trick. Unfortunately, I was still on top of him when he tried to somersault. The horse is fine. I'm in the hospital, fresh out of surgery for a broken femur. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 846

You deserved it 765

Watch out!

By fyln00b - 03/07/2010 04:49 - France

Today, I was horseback riding. Somebody yelled something behind me, so I turned around. Next thing I know, I am on the ground and my head is killing me. It turns out I ran into a tree branch. The person behind me simply said, "Watch out!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 691

You deserved it 8 265

By Anonymous - 07/06/2013 13:25 - United States - Elk Grove

Today, my idiot horse decided to grab a mouthful of stinging nettles while I was riding him. He panicked at the burning sensation in his mouth and bucked me off. Don't worry, though, my fall was cushioned, by the nettles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 502

You deserved it 5 494

Goodbye horses

By Owned - 25/03/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, my parents came to visit me at the ranch I work at. They're scared to death of horses, but I was explaining how they are almost completely harmless. I was showing them how to work around the horse without getting kicked. As they relaxed, the horse kicked me. I now have a broken leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 866

You deserved it 9 247

By Anonymous - 17/01/2012 06:13 - Canada

Today, I broke my wrist when I got into a disagreement with a horse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 160

You deserved it 11 271

perdix 29

Wednesday 10 April 2013 16:07

Gack! We don't know the OP's gender, so it's hard to make a fitting comment. This is why we stick to cars.

stormchaser24 24

Wednesday 10 April 2013 15:59

Ouch, FYL. Hope you feel better soon.

Comments

lonewolf621 17

Wednesday 10 April 2013 23:02

They can bite you too :)

Lizzypumba 7

Wednesday 10 April 2013 23:16

Ouch! Maybe try an English saddle next time.

AerBear115 15

Wednesday 10 April 2013 23:17

Ouch! I know what you mean! I slammed my pelvic bone into the horn and that hurt! Hope you feel better soon!

DustyStorm 16

Wednesday 10 April 2013 23:56

Oh shiiiiii-crapola! Can take 6-8 months to regenerate nerves if you have severe nerve damage, sometimes even more. I feel for you! :-/ Might be better than serious pain...maybe? You tell us...

Life_sucks_13 6

Thursday 11 April 2013 0:33

Sorry OP. horses are pretty crazy with spooking. Maybe switch to an English saddle for now? = feel better

Girher 6

Thursday 11 April 2013 1:08

Oooh that's the worst! Luckily riding English I don't have to worry about a horn. Quick healing though!

vgla 7

Thursday 11 April 2013 4:20

I feel so sorry for you :( thats awful

KyraJFoxx 14

Thursday 11 April 2013 4:43

lmao , that really sucks ! Hope you feel better soon OP .

kittykat2345 10

Thursday 11 April 2013 4:43

This is why you ride english, not western.

jem970 19

Thursday 11 April 2013 4:50

Ouch. I've had that happen before, one of the reasons I switched to an English saddle. I jumped horses for years and my big boy very rarely spooked. But the mare I had before that was drugged at the auction I bought her at and she threw me into a barbed wire fence when we got her home and the drugs wore off. I feel your pain, just make sure you get back on when you are physically able. Also try keeping your heels down, your weight centered and squeeze your thighs and start exposing her to more things now. Tying a plastic bag to the horn and putting her on a lunge line will do her wonders. Also make sure to expose her to dogs and other animals like cows if possible. You can make a horse damn near bomb proof if you work at it. My big boy Ari was. Just don't let this get you down and that "new" horse will make a good one if you start now rather than later.