Health: Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with...

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By brileyyyy - 12/01/2010 03:40 - United States

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 796

You deserved it 4 265

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Same thing different taste

Mush

By Tired Tater - 05/06/2023 20:00 - New Zealand - Christchurch

Today, I over-boiled some potatoes. I was having a bad day and this tipped me over the edge. I burst into tears and threw the potatoes all over my kitchen. I then stomped on the piping hot potatoes. The bottoms of my feet are blistered and still feel like they’re burning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 304

You deserved it 1 482

By Knottywoman - 03/09/2017 23:15

Today, I dreamt my fiancé was rolling frozen potatoes onto my bed to wake me up. In reality I woke up screaming to intense cramps in my legs which almost reduced me to tears. I could barely walk for two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 234

You deserved it 245

By Anonymous - 05/01/2017 11:20

Today, I found out what rotten cooked potato both smells and tastes like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 789

You deserved it 1 880

By Arielle - 31/01/2012 11:07 - Australia

Today, I went to the hospital emergency room to visit my boyfriend who had badly sliced his leg open. It ended with me being admitted with a possible head trauma, after hitting my head on the wall and floor as I collapsed at the sight of his wound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 605

You deserved it 4 401

Funny, thanks

By picklebug - 26/07/2013 16:25 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I was taken to the hospital after I fell down the stairs. The physician who saw me bit his lip and said he would have to amputate my foot, and I fainted in terror. One of the nurses later told me to "learn to take a damn joke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 743

You deserved it 10 295

By WildShortstop13 - 28/01/2015 22:20 - United States - Rapid City

Today, I fell asleep curling my bangs. I now look like Mrs. Potato head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 300

You deserved it 13 284

The ball game

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at a baseball game. I was eating my nachos when all of a sudden I woke up in the hospital, with my dad sitting next to the bed. Apparently, I was hit with a foul ball. He kept the ball for himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 133

You deserved it 3 269

Ironic

By Anonymous - 12/12/2020 11:02 - United States

Today, on my way out to get salt for the driveway, I fell and split my head. I'm now sitting in the ER waiting room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 94

By anon - 26/07/2010 04:22 - United States

Today, I was fired from the restaurant I work at because I missed my shift. I missed it because I was in the hospital for food poisoning from the meal I ate at work last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 115

You deserved it 3 237

By mark807 - 28/04/2012 06:52 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I fell and hit my head on hard concrete. When I went to the emergency room for a CT Scan, the nurse hit me in the head with an IV pole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 511

You deserved it 2 169

24788 6

Tuesday 12 January 2010 9:08

Potatoes are full of win.

mrsd9494 7

Tuesday 12 January 2010 9:47

who throws potatoes?!?!???!

Comments

zadder35 2

Monday 9 June 2014 8:04

I have so many questions.

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Today, I was at a job interview and thought the guy interviewing me was a bit of a perv because he kept staring down at my cleavage. Afterwards, I realised what he was really looking at: the wire in my bra had popped out and had been poking right through my shirt like a dagger. FML

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Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

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You deserved it 61 152

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 301

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I agree, your life sucks 40 362

You deserved it 6 193

Today, I got into a screaming match with the mother of my kids. I told her they need to bathe more often. According to her, anything more than once a week is excessive and bad for their skin. My kids play sports and smell like puppies from the pound. She doesn’t care. FML

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You deserved it 214

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I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 80

Today, for Mother's Day, I surprised my Mother with the news I that I'll be visiting in June. The last time we got to visit was 4 years ago, we live 4000 miles apart and it's a very expensive trip. She said, "No, come next June, I want to lose some more weight before seeing you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 568

You deserved it 1 142

Today, I was getting ready to go pick up a few things for much-needed projects around the house, when I heard my husband yelling from the basement. The lawnmower had kicked a rock through the expensive sliding glass door we just finished paying off. The rattling refrigerator may have to wait. FML

I agree, your life sucks 932

You deserved it 138