Intimacy: Today, I was so drunk that my friends put me to bed during a...

By lovewedge - 09/03/2009 00:25 - United States

Today, I was so drunk that my friends put me to bed during a party. Later I find out that while I was passed out two of my friends came in and had sex while I was in the same bed. They tried to use me as a prop. Now my friends call me the love wedge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 071

You deserved it 23 554

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
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Same thing different taste

By drunk - 06/03/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 281

You deserved it 40 956

This is happening

By mikmak - 20/12/2015 13:26 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I had fallen asleep in the back of a friend's car on the way home from a night out. When I woke up, they were in the middle of a full-on make out session. I had to pretend to be asleep for 20 minutes until they decided to "wake me up". FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 571

You deserved it 3 126

With friends like these…

By marz88 - 24/10/2009 18:27 - United States

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 698

You deserved it 7 135

By bestbfever - 17/05/2017 02:00

Today, my drunk boyfriend called me by my best friend's name in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 850

You deserved it 413

By :( - 27/01/2014 22:31 - Algeria

Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 269

You deserved it 62 394

Twisted

By sleepwalker - 22/11/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 776

You deserved it 4 725

By Ah hell - 31/01/2009 14:43 - United States

Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 873

You deserved it 52 675

By paulinapo - 30/05/2013 01:53 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 342

You deserved it 9 837

Waste moment

By Anonymous - 10/02/2020 20:00

Today, I went out drinking with my friends and my boyfriend met me there. We decided then to come home and planned an intimate moment. I got on top of him and went to kiss his neck. Next thing I know, I fell asleep right before we started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 1 350

I get around

By Permafucked - 12/05/2009 14:23 - United States

Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer, I ended up in bed with one of them, who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 102

You deserved it 86 213

hales_fml 0

Monday 9 March 2009 9:24

"love wedge" made me laugh SO hard.

what_the_fuhh 0

Monday 9 March 2009 9:01

damn, that fucken sucks ass dude. sorry

Comments

kagome_eb 0

Monday 9 March 2009 14:45

don't get drunk. your own fault

zap_fml 0

Monday 9 March 2009 15:57

I'm so glad I didn't read this in a public space, I just laughed so ******* much. Jesus christ. That name has made my day.

neonoodle 0

Monday 9 March 2009 15:59

Shake that bear.

thisismyname_fml 1

Monday 9 March 2009 16:24

Yeah #23. 15, 16, all totally have it right. Don't ever drink alcohol ever. It is the devil. In fact, move to a Quaker village and you can just whittle your day away. ******* seriously people, people can get carried away sometimes, if the OP was at a party with friends (even if they do apparently have demented morals) then whatever. If the OP was a woman who got raped because she drank too much would you say she deserved it? Actually don't bother answering that, I probably already know what you morally superior pricks think.

tokyooo123 0

Monday 9 March 2009 17:17

HAHAHA

Cryptix 0

Monday 9 March 2009 17:55

You call them friends huh?

daedalus_fml 0

Monday 9 March 2009 19:26

wow...

Angrymuffinsrus 0

Monday 9 March 2009 20:47

I can seriously not feel bad for the poster at all... If you were smart, you would not drink until you passed out, and then none of this would have happened. Maybe you have a problem and should call AA