Miscellaneous: Today, I was taken to the principal's office and bitched out... - FML

By Anonymous - 22/11/2013 21:57 - United States - Stillwater

Today, I was taken to the principal's office and bitched out about the dangerous weapon I brought to school. The "weapon" was a pocket fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 895

You deserved it 3 213

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Armed and not dangerous

By littledonny - 12/05/2017 18:00

Today, I went to school wearing the same jacket I had gone hiking in the previous day. When I found out that I had left my 2" pocket knife in the pocket I immediately turned it in to the front office. They promptly had me arrested for bringing a weapon on campus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 012

You deserved it 1 292

Back 2 school

By christine brown - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got suspended for bringing a "hazardous weapon" to school. They were earrings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 102

You deserved it 3 805

Say hello to my plastic friend!

By Pandathepilot - 10/11/2017 15:00

Today, my principal made me visit "anti-violence" classes because I had a picture of me threatening a man with a gun on my Facebook page. It was taken during the school play, where I was acting as a gangster and the gun was just a toy. The principal saw the play. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 639

You deserved it 335

Paul Blurt

By Anonymous - 22/06/2021 16:01

Today, I had various items thrown at me all day at school, one one of which was a ruler that landed flat on my back where I had blistered and peeling sunburn. I yelped, "Motherf***er!" because of the pain, and I was the one given detention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 160

J'accuse...!

By hockeymango57 - 24/09/2017 23:15

Today, one of my friends blew a giant vape cloud and the principal saw and called us into his office. We blamed each other, so the principal checked both of our backpacks. Apparently, my friend snuck his pen into my bag somehow. I don't even vape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 050

You deserved it 635

Kids will be kids

By Anonymous - 04/01/2022 02:01 - United States - West Sacramento

Today, I was at assembly in school. My friend had a water bottle. It was a squirt bottle, and he squirted me, over and over. I got ticked off, so I took it away from him, but when I took the bottle I squeezed it and it squirted all over the people in front of me. The principal saw, and I got in trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 632

You deserved it 1 133

By ouch - 09/02/2011 18:02 - United States

Today, I was in class when all of a sudden I was hit in the head by a metal pencil case. My teacher threw it at me to get my attention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 752

You deserved it 35 549

By da man - 11/02/2009 11:38 - Canada

Today, my friend was picking on me at school by constantly tapping on my shoulder. At recess I had enough. I felt the familiar tap on my shoulder, and I drove my elbow into what I thought was my friend's stomach. It was my Principal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 532

You deserved it 17 400

By overreacting - 03/04/2015 06:08 - United States - Saint Charles

Today, I picked up a rock outside and put it in my pocket because it looked cool. A teacher holding the door open stopped me and sent me to the principal. I was confused and asked the teacher why the strict action. She replied that someone has been putting rocks in the toilet. I got a detention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 924

You deserved it 3 016

By Deaf - 02/07/2015 18:59 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was sent to the principal's office because I refused to take my earbuds out. Those "earbuds" are my hearing aids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 402

You deserved it 1 848

Next

Top comments

mn_shr 22

Saturday 23 November 2013 2:41

Seriously OP, what era are you from?

DocBastard 38

Saturday 23 November 2013 2:47

"DON'T ******* MOVE!! IF YOU DO, I WILL GENTLY COOL YOU WITH THIS! I'LL DO IT, I SWEAR!"

Comments

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Sunday 24 November 2013 1:04

Maybe they thought you'd attack/cut someone with the fan's blades? O.o Geez...Although I am concerned about how they saw that and had a fit about it, but criminals with guns and knives are able to get into schools without any issues. Something's wrong here...

BradTheBrony 19

Monday 25 November 2013 23:38

Maybe they're able to get into schools because they have GUNS AND KNIVES.

Huddisher 10

Tuesday 26 November 2013 0:18

Condoms got you in trouble in my school. Way to promote unsafe sex.

Waredo_Dyrge 11

Tuesday 26 November 2013 6:42

Maybe the principal got confused and thought they were in a wacky Japanese comedy sketch.

KingRay 3

Saturday 30 November 2013 4:28

So, because you don't like zero tolerance you have zero tolerance for zero tolerance. But wouldn't the zeros cancel each other out now meaning you have tolerance for tolerance. So when you say you have zero tolerance for zero tolerance, you're actually saying you have tolerance for tolerance because of your zero tolerance. Understand?

AssassinBug 15

Sunday 1 December 2013 6:34

Wat?

fantasyworld 37

Monday 15 December 2014 13:55

Schools have gotten insane with the whole safety issue.

queenbeemofo 17

Wednesday 16 December 2015 20:49

you really do have to be careful with those things. I mean one pocket fan can blow you away.

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable My ex Jealousy Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

You’re probably wondering what this website is all about. Well, it’s basically a bunch of people who had enough humor to tell you all about their shitty lives, and what it was that made their day suck a big fat one. Some are sad in funny way, som...

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 13

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 510

You deserved it 84 243

The Top

Today, trying to be cute, my boyfriend threw a snowball at me. This would have been fine had it not been hard enough to break my glasses. As a college student, I have to choose between eating for the next two weeks or replacing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 957

You deserved it 2 981

Today, the guy I've talking to for the past 8 months just celebrated his six month 'anniversary' with his girlfriend. He picked her over me, but we agreed to be just friends. My feelings haven’t gone away, though. I can’t help but be jealous and depressed every time he posts about their relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 955

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I've been "spending too much time at the bar." I've been sober for 2 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 847

You deserved it 144

Today, my fiancé told me that he doesn't think cheating is a big deal because everybody does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 979

You deserved it 3 931

Today, I painted an area I had carefully sanded, cleaned, and taped off. I pulled a fan out of the closet to help dry it faster. I turned the fan on, and a million dust particles flew off onto the wet paint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 834

You deserved it 31 907

Today, I grabbed the nearest plastic bag in my bedroom when my boyfriend and I left for Walmart so I could return a pair of shorts. When the cashier dumped the contents of the bag onto the counter at customer service, my shorts and a used condom fell out. It was the longest return of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 616

You deserved it 55 920