Miscellaneous: Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with...

By Shamu - 14/02/2009 00:15 - United States

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 494

You deserved it 8 815

Carnival of Disasters
Dive into carnival, where hilarious costumes meet unexpected mishaps. Laughter is guaranteed, mask or no mask! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/04/2011 17:31 - United States

Today, sun was shining and I felt confident enough to go sunbathing at the beach. In only my bikini and towel, I laid out to get some sun. A while later, a little girl came up to me and said, "Aren't you embarrassed that you're so huge?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 525

You deserved it 11 264

By Noname - 06/03/2009 19:13 - United States

Today, I found out my four best friends are going to Florida for spring break without me. When asked why I was not invited to go with them the answer I received was, "we don't think you would look very good in a bathing suit, and we want to be able to pick up cute guys on the beach." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 663

You deserved it 6 441

By swmmr - 07/08/2011 19:41 - United States

Today, my dad suggested that as an alternative to buying me new school clothes that actually fit, I should just join the swim team, lose some weight, and wear my stuff from last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 455

You deserved it 14 097

Hey guys!

By iannie - 31/07/2011 21:45 - United States

Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 398

You deserved it 39 521

By ThatOneGirl646 - 12/01/2012 00:49 - United States

Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 890

You deserved it 49 532

By Anonymous - 02/06/2019 12:03

Today, I told my mom I was going swimming with friends. She told me, in front of them, not to go into the deep end unless there was an adult around because I'm not old enough to swim on my own. I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 205

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 22:04 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 400

You deserved it 2 300

Looks

By Anonymous - 01/10/2019 06:00

Today, my mom and dad were talking about how if I lost weight, I would be attractive and have guys all over me. My dad said, “That’s exactly what I’m worried about.” It took me a while to realize they both think I’m ugly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 481

You deserved it 364

Supportive

By short&stout - 26/08/2017 20:00

Today, I took the kids to the pool. I'm short and 20lbs overweight but they talked me into it and I put on a swimsuit for the first time in 10 years. As soon as we got there, a girl my height but a good 150lbs heavier said, "It's so nice to see another big girl in a two-piece!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 268

You deserved it 731

By TheRawrza - 26/04/2009 09:47 - United States

Today, I was at a pool party. Standing outside of the pool, I was hesitant about taking my shirt off. A girl in the pool shouted, "Hey, you're not the only fat one here, don't feel bad!" I was worried about what my friends would think of my new bellybutton ring, I didn't think I'm fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 250

You deserved it 8 276

beerpong26 0

Saturday 14 February 2009 5:02

hahahahahahaha

wtf_fml 0

Saturday 14 February 2009 7:11

oh, gosh. dads are always so sensitive.

Comments

bigraws23 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 3:44

ROFLMAO!!!!!! I love your dad

livinmylifelol 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 6:41

LOLOLOLOL. that's so funny!! I feel bad for laughing but this is my favorite FML ever!!

KrystleLynn 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 6:22

HAHAHA!

Hockeylover87_71 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 18:01

HAHA! give your dad a high 5 for me! sorry, but that is hilarious!

Ghado 1

Saturday 17 October 2009 21:31

lose some weight bitch

is_this_a_joke 0

Tuesday 10 November 2009 16:02

I agree with #71 and #73...YDI for being a FATASS..your dad is freakin awesome

shanster 3

Wednesday 11 November 2009 7:05

if you weren't so hideously fat you're dad wouldn't have said that in the first place. Mhmm perhaps you should take this life experience and instead of going to the beach and being lazy during spring break you should go for a jog or something you fat ****.