Love: Today, I was talking to the guy that has been in love with me...

By creeped - 29/12/2009 00:50 - United States

Today, I was talking to the guy that has been in love with me for two years. He said "There is a shortage of perfect breasts in the world. It would be a shame to lose yours." He then creepily looked at me and said "It's true." Thanks, Princess Bride, for supplying creepers with material. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 742

You deserved it 4 551

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

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Same thing different taste

By snitchovich - 27/05/2009 16:46 - United Kingdom

Today, I was sitting in a bar next to this gorgeous guy who kept eyeing me up and after about 30 minutes he finally leaned in to whisper something in my ear. What he said? "If I were you, I would get a push-up bra." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 859

You deserved it 6 046

Looking good

By YoushouldsaythattoHER - 12/09/2018 22:00

Today, a guy was telling me how his girlfriend considers me a "perfect beauty." Not used to getting this sort of compliment every day, I felt extremely flattered… until he started explaining in great detail why he couldn't disagree with her more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 953

You deserved it 203

By devourer, apparently - 14/08/2018 22:18

Today, my boyfriend of two years told me that I had grown on him. I thought it was cute, until he added, "like a flesh eating bacteria". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 430

You deserved it 268

By Anonymous - 17/11/2010 08:03 - United States

Today, I confessed to my best friend that I love him and always have. He whispered to himself, "Why do the fat chicks always want me?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 462

You deserved it 8 860

Worth a shot

By Anonymous - 29/03/2020 17:00

Today, I told the guy I've been in love with for a year how I felt. He replied, "There will never be an us, but you can send nudes if you like." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 938

You deserved it 269

Lil' cutie

By pitytitty - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging about me to his friends, telling them I have a great smile, cute hair, and very perky tits. This wouldn't be so bad if we weren't both men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 786

You deserved it 7 337

By ksgirl - 12/09/2009 07:39 - United States

Today, the guy I have been in love with for years decided to tell me all about his women problems and how he can't find someone. After telling him I loved him he responds, "do you know if anyone else does?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 220

You deserved it 4 057

Alexa, play "Why Can't I Be You?" by The Cure

By UGHHHH - 17/10/2023 00:02

Today, my best friend and longtime crush actually said the words, “Why can’t I find a girl like you?” I told him, “I'm a girl like me, am I not enough?” He winced, hemmed and hawed at the answer, then quickly changed the subject. FML

I agree, your life sucks 962

You deserved it 209

By Mel Ancholy - 18/02/2012 02:04 - United States

Today, I was talking to my husband about a work colleague, whose boyfriend is always sending her flowers and fawning over her. I mentioned how I've never been treated like that. He glanced up from his video game and said, "Shit, Mel. Get a boob job then." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 351

You deserved it 8 217

By HouseMdFangirl - 10/08/2009 06:12 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 765

You deserved it 58 398

Vayt 2

Tuesday 29 December 2009 9:13

If he's quoting The Princess Bride to you, even creepily, he's a keeper.

Acuvue 0

Tuesday 29 December 2009 9:15

Oh noooo! Someone thinks you have perfect breasts! And he's quoting from one of the most oft-quoted movies ever! F YOUR LIFE! Or, you know, congrats.

Comments

anonymouskid35 0

Wednesday 13 January 2010 2:56

****** up.

Kira_Wolfe 0

Monday 1 February 2010 9:19

Creepy though it is, it's a compliment. I tend to quote my fiance's favorite songs, it seems to score points.

MDNL 0

Friday 5 March 2010 17:34

what wrong with him quoteing princess bride?..

Snooopy_fml 5

Tuesday 18 May 2010 13:14

any man who can ACCURATLEY quote princess bride is pretty awesome..

djsmiles 0

Saturday 29 May 2010 23:12

this isnt an fml, its a win! unless u hate this guy or something like that

OhEmGee5 2

Thursday 22 July 2010 6:51

thanks for bragging about your perfect breasts. next

sykopyro69 0

Monday 9 May 2011 10:25

haha if someones gonna quote a movie line get the line right, it's "theres a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, t'would b a putty to damage yours" :P but still that's a compliment b happy

VeganVampyre 26

Monday 31 October 2011 3:06

Dude, no. If you're gonna tell someone to get something right, you've got to make sure you get it right yourself. Spell check! Always! Seriously, do it like it's your religion. AND your favourite hobby. :P "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. 'Twould be a pity to damage yours."