By meltingturtle - 02/08/2016 03:25

Today, I was talking with my girlfriend. We both have family issues, so we'd agreed to open up to each other today. Turns out I'm dating my cousin. FML
I agree, your life sucks 19 185
You deserved it 1 877

meltingturtle tells us more.

meltingturtle 24

OP here. Here's your follow up. My mom and her brother had a rocky relationship. She moved to the west coast some twenty years ago, and never talks about my uncle. I know of him, but never met him due to problems between them. I moved out of state for college, and met my girlfriend there. I'd only been told I had a cousin once, pretty much in passing. My gf and I were both talking, and she mentioned how her dad, named David, was bipolar and had several issues. I asked if she had any aunts or anything cause that sounded a hell of a lot like my estranged uncle my mom hardly talks about. She was all, 'yeah, but my dad never talks about her. Her name is Emily or something I think?' And I was like 'o shit that's my mom'. It was super awkward. I'd known my uncle had a daughter, and she knew her aunt had two. Thing is, I'm a trans boy who goes by a completely name, so we never really figured it out until now. Hope it makes more sense to y'all now.

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Top comments

kusje 30

Hey, at least you have a lot in common with each other!

272 6

Comments

Calingaladha 21

It's legal to marry your second cousin in most places...if you're more closely related than that, it's not a good idea to carry on, most likely.

1 3
soulreaper12296 28

At least you know now before things got serious and had the chance of being married and having kids.

2 2
Goblin182 26

How far removed of cousins? I assume you are not first cousins. I once dated a girl that turned out to be my 3rd cousin. Our grandmothers were first cousins, I think that's at least 3rd cousin if not more distant. We didn't know it at the time we started dating, and since we knew each other as friends, then lovers first, and since we were so distant it never seemed like a thing to us. We kept dating for a while and the break had nothing to do with the cousin thing

3 3
tessas 7

Why would you assume they aren't first cousins? I wouldn't be able to find two of my first cousins in a crowd, and I have met them at some point in my life. Not every family is close. Some have significant issues.

6 1
Bearsmomma 30

OP explained in a reply above. They ARE first cousins.

4 1
Goblin182 26

It was a big assumption on my part. Based on my life experience. My Mom comes from a really big family and I still know all of my first cousins. An erroneous assumption on my part as it turns out.

2 0
danimal_crackerz 26

Incest is wincest ;)

9 11
Nicole_S_ 13

I want to say this is a Supernatural reference but I'm going to ask: Is it?

0 1
Enslaved 36

Einstein and Darwin would have approved.

3 3
acmariner99 25

There's a Weird Al song out there about this I'm positive!

4 2
Punkgirl4554 20

I don't even know most of my family. Just up to my great grandma and whomever decides to come to a family reunion.

15 1
Kramer1998 20

Ydi cause how did you not know? Wouldn't you have known her name at least even with a shitty family life, and maybe there would have been some semblance between you two?

1 26
meltingturtle 24

I'm adopted, so no. There was no semblance. Read my follow up for details on the whole thing

8 0
interesting33 36

What are the odds!? But if you are adopted, then technically you aren't related to your cousin by blood so dating wouldn't be a problem genetically would it? (which is the main reason it is frowned upon).

16 1
marcranger 28

One of my uncles had a falling out with his parents before I was born, and as a result, I have never met him or his kids. I don't know my cousins' names or what they look like, but sort of luckily, it's an uncommon enough last name and my mom's family from a small enough town that I'd be able to put two and two together if I ever ran into them. So yeah, I can see how OP found himself in this pickle.

4 1
tessas 7

Depends on whether he is talking about his biological first cousin, or his adopted first cousin.

0 0
alohaui 18

This article doesn't show your follow up. Maybe you thought you posted it and something happened? I searched for your follow up outside of this article on the fml site, but found nothing. Just wanted to let you know because I'm interested in this story ☺

1 0
meltingturtle 24

What the hell, my follow up is gone! No, I know it was there, it was in reply to a comment and people referenced it in their own comments. Hell, I even got a badge for it. Wtf... ANYWAYS here's a recap my mum and uncle didn't have a good relationship, I knew I had a cousin but nothing about her, she knew she had two female cousins, and on top of it I'm trans male so when we introduced it wasn't like we were both all 'oh haha my cousin has the same name' or whatever, I'm also adopted and we've not had sex, nor will we at least for a long while, so no chance of babies with any issues. Uh, what else... Yeah, I think that's about it. Pretty pissed my follow-up is gone though. >:(

0 0
meltingturtle 24

It was in reply to a comment that is no longer there. I think it got downvotes too much and so the original comment and all its replies were auto-removed. Damn.

0 0
meltingturtle 24

OP here. Here's your follow up. My mom and her brother had a rocky relationship. She moved to the west coast some twenty years ago, and never talks about my uncle. I know of him, but never met him due to problems between them. I moved out of state for college, and met my girlfriend there. I'd only been told I had a cousin once, pretty much in passing. My gf and I were both talking, and she mentioned how her dad, named David, was bipolar and had several issues. I asked if she had any aunts or anything cause that sounded a hell of a lot like my estranged uncle my mom hardly talks about. She was all, 'yeah, but my dad never talks about her. Her name is Emily or something I think?' And I was like 'o shit that's my mom'. It was super awkward. I'd known my uncle had a daughter, and she knew her aunt had two. Thing is, I'm a trans boy who goes by a completely name, so we never really figured it out until now. Hope it makes more sense to y'all now.

90 3
Zanquis 22

Well tbh the only real objection to a relationship with your cousin is weird moments at family meetings and any risk for future offspring. They was I see it you have no risk for any of those to happen since your family is not likely to meet and as far as I know biologically getting kids for a trans was impossible last time I checked. So well it might be a bit weird, but I don't see any real objections in your case.

101 9