Kids: Today, I was teaching my 4 year-old daughter about "stranger...

By imnotastranger - 09/05/2014 03:01

Today, I was teaching my 4 year-old daughter about "stranger danger" and how to deal with it. Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 621

You deserved it 6 931

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Same thing different taste

Running gag

By TheJoker - 12/05/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I was jogging in my neighborhood when I saw a kid's ball roll over to where I was jogging. I stopped, grabbed the ball for the kid and went to hand it to him. He then yelled, "Stranger danger!" and his parents came sprinting out. I had to explain the story to the police for 30 minutes. FML

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By gloomy - 15/08/2017 20:00

Today, my daughter and I went to the mall. While we were looking for clothes, she walked away from me and touched a man on the arm and smiled and said "Hi!" The man freaked out and screamed at me for letting that "thing" in public and to "wear a condom next time." FML

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Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML

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By john doe - 07/12/2013 17:29 - United States - Portland

Today, my 6 year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML

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By unknown - 15/09/2011 00:21 - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML

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By anonymous - 13/03/2016 19:53 - United States - Marysville

Today, when my son gets mad in a store, he will scream stranger danger and run away from me, and to an employee, and ask for help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 967

You deserved it 2 417

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By angry mama - 21/09/2019 00:01

Today, while picking my daughter up from school, I saw her being beaten by two boys while the teacher stood there doing nothing. I ran to help, but then she pushed one of the boys off her. The teacher then pulled her away, yelled at her and then yelled at me for "not raising my kid right." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 814

You deserved it 135

Straight to jail

By anon - 15/07/2011 01:51 - United States

Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 000

You deserved it 70 968

Stranger Danger!

By tried to help - 07/10/2019 00:01

Today, I was going into a store and saw a woman roughly handling a screaming toddler. I kept walking, until I heard the kid scream, "Help! You’re not my mommy!” I called 911 and stood behind the car to keep her from taking off. The cops arrived to see me fending off blows from a very pissed off grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 513

You deserved it 658

By DocShadow - 03/12/2013 17:33 - United States - New York

Today, my 4-year-old daughter stood up to a bully in the mall. I was the one who was getting bullied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 662

You deserved it 8 850

Pleonasm 35

Friday 9 May 2014 13:19

She screamed, you screamed, they all screamed for icescream.

MattM95 16

Friday 9 May 2014 13:18

Kids will do anything for ice cream.

Comments

Verity101 10

Friday 9 May 2014 19:47

Daaang! But at least people helped?? :D

nickyLA 6

Friday 9 May 2014 23:28

Scary child. Don't mess with her

ohishkabibble 21

Saturday 10 May 2014 0:35

Truth be told, OP, "stranger danger" is not the most effective way to teach your child to be safe anyway. A lot of kidnappings and stuff are perpetrated by a person that the victim knows. Just throwing that out there, so maybe you can reconsider your strategy.

1jordan1 11

Saturday 10 May 2014 5:41

So? Stranger danger is to teach you not to get rides from strangers or to let them give you candy or something. He's teaching his kids to always have an adult they know present when speaking to strangers. That has nothing to do with the fact that people he knows will probably be more the ones to look out for.

itcomesinthrees 10

Saturday 10 May 2014 0:58

I pulled a similar stunt when I was 3 or 4. I'm 28 and my parents still bring it up regularly and give me a hard time about it.

sassy3dcat 1

Saturday 10 May 2014 2:02

lmfoa

cassbird09 12

Saturday 10 May 2014 3:45

What a little shit.

tehdarkness 21

Saturday 10 May 2014 4:09

Well, at least the kid knows that it will work if there is ever a real stranger danger!

yourwifelovesme 25

Saturday 10 May 2014 4:20

"I scream, you scream, we all scream for- ok you can stop screaming now"

PengiPou 12

Saturday 10 May 2014 4:22

*an ice cream

Saraishi 24

Saturday 10 May 2014 4:27

Either she didn't understand you or she was being a brat. If it's the latter you need to make sure she doesn't think she can get away with it, now or ever.