Kids: Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking...

By brittbrat4 - 13/08/2011 06:51 - United States

Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 307

You deserved it 36 637

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Same thing different taste

Rite of passage

By tortilla - 28/11/2020 16:58 - United States - Petaluma

Today, I got punched after telling my 11-year-old cousin that her period is "coming for her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 1 270

By Anonymous - 16/02/2012 19:41 - United States

Today, I was holding my 3 year old brother, and apparently he thinks it's hilarious to pull my tank top down and scream ''BOOBS!'' in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 861

You deserved it 4 972

They hated her because she spoke the truth

By Anonymous - 21/08/2021 06:01

Today, I threw a pillow at my 8 year-old cousin while play-fighting. She gave me a look, then muttered, "You don't have any girlfriends and the girls that talk to you probably have no taste." FML

I agree, your life sucks 775

You deserved it 114

Kids these days…

By Anonymous - 13/04/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, my two year-old cousin was having a temper tantrum. I decided to give him a flashlight because playing with it usually distracts him. It didn't. Instead, he hit me in the face with it as hard as possible, leaving a bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 067

You deserved it 24 987

By girlmeetsworld - 18/02/2009 23:27 - United States

Today, my four-year-old cousin gave me a hug, basically stuffing his face into my crotch. Then he pulled it out and said "Ew, that's stinky" in front of my entire class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 135

You deserved it 13 657

By Anonymous - 24/11/2012 13:59 - United States

Today, I was playing with my four year-old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 470

You deserved it 7 855

You little knob

By keelah - 27/06/2014 21:57 - United States - Montgomery

Today, my cousin asked me what it's like to be so fat. I chastised him and said that was a rude thing to ask. He apologized, then asked me what it's like to be such a pussy. He didn't stop until he, a 10 year-old kid, had reduced me, a 26 year-old woman, to tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 694

You deserved it 8 588

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 03:20 - United States

Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing, looked around and saw that the 12 year-old neighbor and his friends were watching through the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 038

You deserved it 12 506

By Anonymous - 22/08/2013 04:48 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, my little brother grabbed my boobs and wouldn't let go until I pried his hands off. When I told my mom, her response was, "Get over it. He's a little kid who doesn't know any better." He's 14 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 046

You deserved it 3 785

The nickname that sticks

By boobswerehere - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Reno

Today, I went to visit my best friend at her house. I saw her five year-old brother playing in the front yard, and as I walked up to the door he shouted, "Boobs are here! Boobs are here!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 971

You deserved it 1 570

Dr_Jalepenos 0

Saturday 13 August 2011 12:27

That was his version of "HULK SMASH!".

Accept 11

Saturday 13 August 2011 12:27

Is that a new fighting attack?

Comments

99jojojojo1 5

Sunday 14 August 2011 9:55

lol...

AnarchyAmber 5

Sunday 14 August 2011 10:21

That's when you scream at the top of your lungs "******** CANCER!!!" and watch how fast he runs >=)

badactor009 0

Sunday 14 August 2011 12:32

Beat that kid with a hammer.

itsonlymeghan 0

Sunday 14 August 2011 15:49

BAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I'm sorry, but I don't think I've ever laaughed so hard.

michaelrules 0

Sunday 14 August 2011 17:18

lmao. I did that to my sister when I was 12 because she kicked me where it hurts.

RLove1997 0

Sunday 14 August 2011 21:30

I found a new trend dey gonna love dis one at school!

BubblyNinja13 0

Monday 15 August 2011 5:08

OUCH!!!:/

marciealban 4

Monday 15 August 2011 5:45

getting hit in the boob is so dangerous tho cuz you can get breast cancer from it.

Friaza 29

Monday 15 August 2011 6:30

You do realize when you kick a guy in the nuts you can make him infertile, right?

PapSmearNinja 4

Monday 15 August 2011 10:45

lmfao now you know

Keywords

Miscellaneous Insects Gross Neighbours Cute Kids Love Proposal Awkward Health Amazon Relatable Hair Delivery Scary Allergies Animals Dogs Babysitter Skincare Emergency Doctor Hospital Vacation Engagement ring AITA Social Media Facebook Money Scams

The Top

Today, I got back the results of an allergy test I decided to get because I felt generally tired after meals. Turns out that I'm allergic to, among other things, meat (yep, is a thing), nuts (of course), milk, egg, rice, carrot, apple, yeast (as in bread), and even soy. Seems I'm allergic to… food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 88

Today, my wife came home from work early and told me she'd been fired. She was really upset so I told her how much she means to me and how much I love her to help cheer her up. She then told me she was caught getting it on with another employee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 379

You deserved it 2 502

The Top

Today, I have to admit I sometimes snoop in my daughter's room, but she must have realised this because she has started laying booby traps for me. I'm currently in the ER getting fishing hooks removed from my hand after she taped them to a mousetrap and left the mousetrap inside her desk drawer. I deserve it but, FML

I agree, your life sucks 250

You deserved it 2 208

Today, during foreplay, I was trying to be sexy. But instead I fell off the bed, landed in the laundry basket, and was attacked by the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 159

You deserved it 5 701

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 631

You deserved it 8 171

Today, my sister told me that if I was a gentleman, I'd lend her money. I hate my sister so I told her if she was a lady, she wouldn't have sucked off the local drug dealer for weed. I'm now nursing my jaw where she punched me, and mom overheard what I'd said so we're currently in the middle of a family shouting match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 178

You deserved it 391

Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 327

You deserved it 2 936

Today, my fiancée told me that she wants us to have an open marriage. She reasons that since she doesn't equate sex with love, there's no logical reason for me to be against her having sex with other people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 850

You deserved it 5 470