Work: Today, I was trying to clean the belt of my register at work...

By cashier - 12/07/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, I was trying to clean the belt of my register at work at a grocery store. I noticed two strips of rubber stuck in the corner of the belt, and after pulling on them periodically all morning one finally came loose. It was a foot. I had been pulling at a dead rat trapped in the belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 583

You deserved it 3 325

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Same thing different taste

By Help - 16/09/2011 16:20 - Australia

Today, at work, I found a used condom in the fax machine. I'm the electrical maintenance repair for the company. I have to untangle it from the belts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 076

You deserved it 2 046

By Abbynyc - 28/09/2014 11:40 - United States - Bay Shore

Today, while running an event, my belt loop got caught in those metal whorls that outdoor chairs have. I couldn't get it undone and had to greet guests by standing up and bringing the chair with me, hanging from my ass. My coworker finally had to cut the belt loop to set me free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 676

You deserved it 4 170

Pay attention

By stickyickystone - 21/07/2019 14:12

Today, I got my hand caught in a belt sander while sanding down what was supposed to become a "Caution" sign. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 652

You deserved it 373

By Anonymous - 18/11/2009 04:08 - United States

Today, my water wouldn't go down my shower drain. Confused, I stuck a metal stick expecting hair, but instead stabbed and pulled up a rat that was dead in my drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 981

You deserved it 2 471

By umyuck - 03/05/2015 16:55 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I noticed my shower drain wasn't draining well. I cleaned it out, thinking it was just a rat's nest of hair. Wrong. It was an actual dead rat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 499

You deserved it 2 518

LM308 fried

By Anonymous - 03/05/2012 21:17 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I finally found out what the horrible smell at work was. A rat had decided to make its home in our emergency exit sign and had been fried by the electricity. I now have to fix this. Hello scorched dead rat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 335

You deserved it 2 083

By Anonymous - 23/07/2012 15:41 - United States - Apex

Today, while bussing at my restaurant job, I felt a cold, wet animal slither down my leg. I started shrieking loudly and dancing dementedly to get it off, and everyone in the restaurant turned to stare. Then I realized there was a hole in my pocket and some quarters had slid out down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 031

You deserved it 8 257

By shaviTuT - 07/02/2013 19:44 - Malaysia - Bandar Penggaram

Today, after three weeks of holding out, my stingy boss finally called animal control about the birds in the air vent above the register. While I was working, they rummaged through the vents, causing live maggots to fall down right in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 449

You deserved it 2 672

By xxmollyxx - 16/12/2010 11:54 - Sweden

Today, I dropped my remote behind the bed and went to reach for it. Instead of the remote, I grabbed hold of a rat carcass that must have got in when builders were working in my bathroom several weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 629

You deserved it 3 574

By mcmanager - 11/08/2014 14:18 - United States - San Francisco

Today, at my job as a fast food manager, I saw one of my employees "trying to pick the bugs out" of our cookies. They were the raisins in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 775

You deserved it 3 611

AK 2

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:49

Oh my dear god. Didn't it like.. smell or something?

crescent_indigo 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:55

epic.

Comments

AK 2

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:49

Oh my dear god. Didn't it like.. smell or something?

Imawhalerider 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 10:34

Worlds Stupidist Criminals. training mouses to steal.

tarula 1

Sunday 12 July 2009 11:13

World's Most Stupid Comment. Bad grammar, spelling and use of a plural. I wish I had freaking (sic) mouses

Orchid_fml 2

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:51

oh wow , that's bruutal .

kopei 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:52

. . . ._. Ew, disgusting.

chocolatebear99 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:53

ewww gross was it all squished up?

crescent_indigo 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:55

epic.

chocolatebear99 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:55

ewww gross was it all squished up?

MrCleanCut 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:56

lmaooo! that right there can scar you for life! lol *shudders*

locasocha 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:56

thats why they call it DIRTY JERSEY

too_much_fun 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 9:59

This just gave me a really good idea for a prank.......... :)

theoffkid 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 10:03

Really nasty, I wonder if the health dept. checks for stuff like that.

Keywords

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Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 090

You deserved it 467

Today, I found out that my husband has been cheating on me with his girl bestie for 4 years. I also found out he's been having threesomes with his male bestie. Both people have been around me and my family this entire time. We've been married for 15 years. Joke's on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 415

You deserved it 171

The Top

Today, I got an email from the local D and D meet up group that the next meeting will be on Feb. 14th. I don't know what is more sad: that the group is meeting on Valentine's Day, or that I have nothing better to do but go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 252

You deserved it 4 530

Today, I got a urinary tract infection. I didn’t realize men could get those. Worse yet, my girlfriend thinks it’s an STI because, “IF I’M NOT FUCKING YOU, SOMEONE MUST BE!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 106

You deserved it 212

Today, after evicting my roommate for excessively not abiding by the lease agreements, he thought he could get back at me by sending me a video of my sister giving him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 736

You deserved it 1 554

Today, my "friend" almost killed both of my cats by feeding them chocolate donuts, even after I slapped one out of his hand and spelled out to him exactly why chocolate is bad for cats. Just to rub more salt into the wound, I got pulled over for speeding while I was driving like mad to get to the vet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 935

You deserved it 153

Today, my boyfriend wouldn’t stop smacking and slurping his food. I told him to at least chew with his mouth closed. He looked me dead in the eye, with a mouth full of chewed up pizza, and said, “No.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 387

You deserved it 354

Today, on my and my wife's very first camping holiday, someone cut a hole in the tent wall while we slept and stole everything, including my keys and the car. Finally getting home, it seems the thieves got our address from the car's sat-nav and burgled the house as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 777

You deserved it 507

Same thing different taste

Pay attention

LM308 fried

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