Miscellaneous: Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my...

By Adrian16 - 18/01/2010 11:01 - Norway

Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 410

You deserved it 65 708

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Same thing different taste

Sucker

By Anonymous - 08/09/2021 14:01

Today, I tried out my new noise-canceling headphones while vacuuming my house. They worked so well that I didn't hear the vacuum stop when the plug fell out of the outlet. I accidentally had the vacuum off the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 505

You deserved it 1 018

By ouch - 12/12/2009 20:36 - United States

Today, I finally finished vacuuming my downstairs. Instead of finding the wall outlet and unplugging the vacuum, I triumphantly tugged the cord from across the room to release the plug from the wall. It flew at me at top speed and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 944

You deserved it 41 956

That sucks

By Anonymous - 29/11/2018 15:30

Today, I bought a new vacuum cleaner after having to go several months without one. Immediately, I wanted to try it out. I must have underestimated how powerful it was, as it sucked up my socks and then broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 484

You deserved it 969

By anonymous - 20/03/2013 05:42 - United States

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I started singing and harmonizing with the vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 252

You deserved it 4 735

"If I could turn back time…"

By inappropes - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I came into work early to clean equipment, with my headphones on, singing to myself. I lost track of time, and wound up with the entire office watching me belt tunes out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 502

You deserved it 993

Proper job

By So so close to clean - 08/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Warren

Today, with words of encouragement from my mom, I vacuumed my room. After finishing and admiring my job well done, I went to put the vacuum away. It caught on the plug for my electric razor which was dangling below the dresser and yanked that and everything else that was on top of it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 413

You deserved it 1 292

By baldspot - 02/04/2012 05:38 - Australia

Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 980

You deserved it 2 886

By No-Sleep Nellie - 07/07/2015 13:26 - United States - Waterloo

Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 935

You deserved it 1 721

By superhero1043 - 14/05/2010 05:01 - United States

Today, I realized that my baby stops crying loudly whenever I turn on the vacuum cleaner. I'm either stuck with a fussy baby all day, or the roaring sound of a vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 604

You deserved it 5 229

Definitely done that

By Anonymous - 18/10/2019 04:00

Today, at work, I put my earphones in to listen to some music. An hour later, I realised I never pressed play. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 1 176

harrisonmoon 0

Monday 18 January 2010 16:10

you totally deserve it for being so dumb. wouldn't you at least been able to feel if it's on or something?

Xellith 5

Monday 18 January 2010 16:11

******* idiot..

Comments

waterynuggets 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 2:56

This is completely believable.

xlostwithoutu 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 3:20

You can tell this is obviously fake.... bullshitter

buttshapedfruit 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 3:40

lmao!!! hahahahaha ydi dumbass! rofl hahaha x'D

anonymous45610 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 4:05

nice

3rw0n 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 4:36

OP= fail. these kinda things make my life seem less messed up. thank you :)

shugacane 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 4:37

lmaooooo please dont kill me, lol this is really funny

erinlpx 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 4:48

So then you weren't really vacuuming the house at all, were you?

facu 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 4:54

if u can actually listen to headphones on top of a working vacuum cleaner, u must truly be on ur way to deafness.

blanketyblank 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 5:21

fake. you didn't feel that it wasn't working or see that everything you were trying to pick up was still there??

Erindub 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 6:07

This FML is full of more holes than swiss cheese

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Weddings Love My ex Jealousy Friends AITA Health Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Relatable Therapy Mental health Thanksgiving Covid Argument Kids Parenting Medication Ironic Cute Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Money Work

The Top

Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 663

You deserved it 82

Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 356

You deserved it 4 298

The Top

Today, I drove past a fragrant steakhouse and my mouth began to water and my stomach started rumbling, which would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that I'm a vegan and an animal lover. My confused body craves burning flesh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 676

You deserved it 62 820

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about how I'm jealous of her best guy friend always hanging around her. She responded by saying, "Wait, I thought you knew I was dating him too?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 061

You deserved it 6 616

Today, it's been a few years since after I married my soulmate, and two years since he found he had a daughter with his ex. The last two years have been spent in custody court. Our savings are drained by support payments, and our own pregnancy plans are on indefinite hold. I can’t take much more. I want a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 159

You deserved it 218

Today, an irate woman came into my store, screaming that she wanted a refund for the “defective” juicer we sold her. Apparently we’re all idiots who can’t build thing properly. I work at Best Buy and she was trying to juice bananas, but got mad they kept coming out as goop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 416

You deserved it 105

Today, I heard noises outside my front door. I looked out through the window, only to see my boyfriend encouraging his dog to take a dump on my welcome mat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 932

You deserved it 5 119

Today, I went to visit my alcoholic father. He remembered to ask me how my dog Reggie is, but could not remember the name of "my pal." My "pal" is also my wife of four years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 042

You deserved it 2 405