Intimacy: Today, I was walking around in the mall when I dropped my purse....

By WorstLifeEver - 25/06/2010 00:45 - United States

Today, I was walking around in the mall when I dropped my purse. When I bent down to pick it up, some guy came up behind me, humped my ass, then ran away laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 902

You deserved it 13 392

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Same thing different taste

By anon - 05/04/2017 04:00

Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 706

You deserved it 758

By asdffhhjk - 15/05/2013 08:08 - Philippines - Makati

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 102

You deserved it 9 389

By scfead - 14/08/2009 22:28 - United States

Today, I was walking home when a man passed me and stopped. Thinking he was staring at my butt, I asked him kindly to stop. He then laughed and grabbed my wallet that was in my back pocket, and ran. He wasn't staring at my butt, and found it funny that I thought he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 528

You deserved it 16 202

HEY YOU

By stabbed with kindness - 02/03/2013 21:44 - Russian Federation - Elektrostal

Today, on the way home, a guy yelled "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walked faster. He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissed myself in fear, thinking I was being mugged. Turns out I'd left my wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 537

You deserved it 45 208

By grabber - 09/08/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 356

You deserved it 11 010

Are you new?

By Anonymous - 28/06/2012 02:28 - United States - Lakewood

Today, while walking around the local thrift store, I noticed an attractive guy watching me and following me through the aisles. As he followed me to my car I was sure I would get his number. He then asks me to bring my purse inside as I had been tagged as a shoplifter. I work at the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 760

You deserved it 2 533

By Gitana - 22/04/2012 19:08 - Spain - Tafalla

Today, I was trying on some clothes in the store's changing room, when someone reached under the door and grabbed my purse, shoes, and pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 909

You deserved it 3 169

By cassidy_smith12 - 24/08/2013 14:55 - United States - Medina

Today, I was walking down the street when a man stole my purse. He then opened the purse, threw up in it, and gave it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 525

You deserved it 3 570

By anonymous - 20/12/2010 11:23

Today, while I was walking home from work, it started to rain. Clutching my bag in one hand, I started to run so I wouldn't get too wet. I saw a man running towards me and all of a sudden he tackled me to the ground. He thought I had stolen someone's handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 115

You deserved it 3 270

By dhbeaver - 17/03/2012 13:04 - United States

Today, while coming out of Walmart, I dropped a $50 bill. Some kid came running up after me yelling, "Hey mister, you dropped this!" as he ran past me laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 021

You deserved it 4 611

Nena713 0

Friday 25 June 2010 9:22

What an ass.

kidsanchez1 4

Friday 25 June 2010 9:32

I'm sorry I was dared to do it

Comments

tm3000 0

Sunday 27 June 2010 11:51

lmfaooo this reminds me if my cousin Randy he would do exactly that :D

RedRiot 0

Sunday 27 June 2010 11:52

lol I'm sorry I would feel bad, but you would've had to be wearing really skimpy clothes to have that happen.

infernoblast24 0

Sunday 27 June 2010 17:41

RENEGADE PERVERT!!!

tangyterp83 0

Monday 28 June 2010 5:28

yeah that's called assault and hopefully this kid will do it to the wrong person and end up on the sex offender registry.

captcore 0

Monday 28 June 2010 6:02

hahahahahahahahahaha

moneypenny_fml 0

Monday 28 June 2010 7:58

lmfao

nismo_r2 5

Monday 28 June 2010 9:28

hahahhaha it was me!!!

treyroxx 0

Monday 28 June 2010 9:45

dude tht guy is my new hero. ydi for having a nice ass.

taradaniellexo 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 2:01

I wouldve attacked him lmao

sucks4u918 4

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:02

HAHAHAHAHAH. i can SO picture this :D

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The Top

Today, I'm in the same city as my boyfriend for the first time in two months. My body apparently did not like the idea of me having sex again, as I promptly got a UTI and then the week-long breakthrough bleeding that antibiotics often cause me. The same thing happened the week before he had to move, too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 373

You deserved it 184

Today, while cleaning my vehicle at the car wash, the vacuum cleaner found a new purpose. As I twisted around, the mouth of the hose made its way down to my crotch and latched on. It definitely wasn’t painful, but I’ve now been sucked off by a vacuum. Best yet weirdest blow job ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 349

You deserved it 1 277

The Top

Today, I asked the person I love to commit to me. Instead, he packed his shit and moved out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 709

You deserved it 439

Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 387

You deserved it 3 951

Today, my mother had to ask me when my birthday was, because she gets it confused with the day she bought our old car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 953

You deserved it 1 706

Today, when I got out of the shower, my mother, my boyfriend, and 3 of my friends confronted me for an intervention. My problem? They think I'm a workaholic. What they don't know is that I lost my job 4 weeks ago. I stay up all night filling out job applications. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 817

You deserved it 228

Today, I decided to take a nap while listening to my iPod, on the lowest volume possible. My girlfriend woke me up by turning the volume all the way up. I still can't hear out of both ears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 800

You deserved it 5 222

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that he's not very good at dirty talk. He does it every time we have sex and it always turns me off. He started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 348

You deserved it 7 289

Same thing different taste

HEY YOU

Are you new?

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