Intimacy: Today, I was walking around in the mall when I dropped my purse....

FML for mobile
Free

By WorstLifeEver - 25/06/2010 00:45 - United States

Today, I was walking around in the mall when I dropped my purse. When I bent down to pick it up, some guy came up behind me, humped my ass, then ran away laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 908

You deserved it 13 393

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By anon - 05/04/2017 04:00

Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 714

You deserved it 763

By asdffhhjk - 15/05/2013 08:08 - Philippines - Makati

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 110

You deserved it 9 390

By scfead - 14/08/2009 22:28 - United States

Today, I was walking home when a man passed me and stopped. Thinking he was staring at my butt, I asked him kindly to stop. He then laughed and grabbed my wallet that was in my back pocket, and ran. He wasn't staring at my butt, and found it funny that I thought he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 531

You deserved it 16 202

HEY YOU

By stabbed with kindness - 02/03/2013 21:44 - Russian Federation - Elektrostal

Today, on the way home, a guy yelled "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walked faster. He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissed myself in fear, thinking I was being mugged. Turns out I'd left my wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 542

You deserved it 45 220

By grabber - 09/08/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 363

You deserved it 11 014

Are you new?

By Anonymous - 28/06/2012 02:28 - United States - Lakewood

Today, while walking around the local thrift store, I noticed an attractive guy watching me and following me through the aisles. As he followed me to my car I was sure I would get his number. He then asks me to bring my purse inside as I had been tagged as a shoplifter. I work at the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 764

You deserved it 2 534

By Gitana - 22/04/2012 19:08 - Spain - Tafalla

Today, I was trying on some clothes in the store's changing room, when someone reached under the door and grabbed my purse, shoes, and pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 916

You deserved it 3 170

By cassidy_smith12 - 24/08/2013 14:55 - United States - Medina

Today, I was walking down the street when a man stole my purse. He then opened the purse, threw up in it, and gave it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 531

You deserved it 3 570

By anonymous - 20/12/2010 11:23

Today, while I was walking home from work, it started to rain. Clutching my bag in one hand, I started to run so I wouldn't get too wet. I saw a man running towards me and all of a sudden he tackled me to the ground. He thought I had stolen someone's handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 124

You deserved it 3 271

By dhbeaver - 17/03/2012 13:04 - United States

Today, while coming out of Walmart, I dropped a $50 bill. Some kid came running up after me yelling, "Hey mister, you dropped this!" as he ran past me laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 025

You deserved it 4 611

Nena713 0

Friday 25 June 2010 9:22

What an ass.

kidsanchez1 4

Friday 25 June 2010 9:32

I'm sorry I was dared to do it

Comments

Thtguyukno 2

Wednesday 18 May 2011 19:52

Don't drop the.....uh, purse?

therapist619 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:13

I woul do the same

Justice264 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 5:39

was he hot?

ilovemyryan9 2

Saturday 13 August 2011 9:15

u gotta admitt .... did u like it?¿?

SheaLili 1

Monday 15 August 2011 17:22

Was it bonerific?

Gela96 0

Tuesday 30 August 2011 5:44

Im sry but thats hilarious. Its okay. I am an ass.

bloodgirl_fml 5

Tuesday 27 September 2011 0:05

haha, sorry buts thats actually funny...it would be better if he was hot at the same time! ^_^

dmanurmancldbe 3

Thursday 20 October 2011 16:01

Must be a beautiful ass!!:)

flooger101 6

Thursday 12 January 2012 9:20

Sexual harassment x's 10!!!!

cyanidexgrimm 0

Thursday 26 April 2012 16:08

i used to pull that prank all the time in h.s. what a douche... he needs to grow up

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Embarrassing Awkward Work Miscellaneous Politics Parents Weird Health Poopoo peepee I need your advice Anniversary Animals Cats Weather Kids Love Sex Cute Kittens Intimacy Underwear Gross Music Weddings Religion Stalker Cheating Mental health Transportation Cars

The Top

Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, but when I told him anal takes prep, like stretching and lubing, and you can’t just jam a knob up there like in a porno, he lost all interest, asked for a blowjob, and when I said no, he started sulking. I struggle to remember why I’m with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 466

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 712

You deserved it 15 149

The Top

Today, I was once again mistaken for an escaped convict. I live near a women's correctional facility and apparently my nursing scrubs look a lot like their prisoners' uniforms. The cop made me late for work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 371

You deserved it 1 291

Today, some muscle-head showed up at my house and started beating on me. Turned out my son had been posing online as a Navy SEAL, using a picture of me, and had dared this guy to come over and fight him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 687

You deserved it 2 034

Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 950

You deserved it 2 015

Today, my boyfriend gave me a bucket of Twizzlers for our one year anniversary because "He knew I liked them." He has no idea why I am so upset. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 603

You deserved it 47 423

Today, my ex told me he never wanted to talk to me again, because of how annoying I am. I’m still madly in love with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 537

Today, for the third time this week, my boss made me switch desks. Each new desk is closer to the door than the last one. I think he's trying to tell me something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 855

You deserved it 2 768

Same thing different taste

HEY YOU

Are you new?

Top comments

Comments