By beleria - 23/04/2012 22:41 - United States

Today, I went grocery shopping. As I was leaning in to pick up some produce, someone viciously slapped me on the butt. I whirled around and nobody was anywhere in sight. Now I'm starting to worry that I'm losing my mind. FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 238
You deserved it 2 892
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

linkinpark98 23

Maybe you're just considered really attractive by the ghost who owns the fruit section. ;)

124 9

Comments

DocBastard 38

Lettuce: Oh yeah, you like that? You like it rough? Carrot: RUN LADY! He's stickin' me up there next!

79 10
Softballchhickk 11

are you sure you didn't bump into something?

2 8
linkinpark98 23

I don't think a vicious slap is equivalent to bumping into something. :P

6 1
TheMathMajor 26

I was thinking that maybe her underwear elastic just snapped and it felt like a slap.

3 1
EyesofStone 27

Perhaps a poltergeist? They're known for being a bit raunchy.

10 0
kandi_kid69 15

16- They're after her liver next..

2 0
French_Toast_fml 3

These days, you can't go shopping without worrying about being assaulted by produce.

34 1
21jason 9

If it makes you feel less crazy next time I can slap your ass and not run

22 1
perdix 29

Wait until you see what you get when bend over the meat counter! Wear a really short skirt and you'll get some loins, on the house. ;)

26 1
kingsley_fml 8

Perhaps some loose meat as well? A t-bone steak?

5 0
perdix 29

Loose meat, tight meat. It's all good :)

11 0
KriiFahMoro 9

I have a feeling that we're talking about vaginas right now...

5 2
murdersquirrel 15

146 - Are you Carlton from Fresh Prince?

0 0
speshlk37 13

It was ten years ago today when that old pervert died of a hear attack in front of the snow peas...

21 0
fuckmebutdontfml 16

maybe you were in such a need for a good slap in the butt that you felt it :)

8 1
Feared 9

No, Ninjas aren't vicious. If they slap your ass, it's in a more silent deadly way.

38 2