Kids: Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the...

By Anonymous - 01/11/2010 23:56 - Canada

Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 160

You deserved it 42 076

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 25/10/2013 04:35 - United States - Grand Prairie

Today, I went to a haunted house with the girl I like, thinking that she would get scared and turn to me for comfort. I ended up running out, and was put on the Wall of Shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 736

You deserved it 21 015

By Anonymous - 25/06/2009 02:06 - Canada

Today, I was visiting my friend's new house and he was showing me around. I saw a small door in the wall and decided to open it. When I opened it, his daughter was hiding in there and screamed to scare me. Now I know my scream is more high pitched than his daughter's. I'm a 37 year old male. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 752

You deserved it 7 383

By Flutie - 27/10/2017 22:00

Today, I went to a haunted house with my fiancé. A few minutes in, I saw someone following us so I turned and screamed. She ran off and my fiancé explained that she wasn't an actor, just a lady with a pigment disorder. I can never go back there again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 398

You deserved it 770

Skittish

By mack - 25/10/2009 08:54 - Canada

Today, I went to a "haunted" theme park. Actors had been trying to scare me the whole night. I was waiting by an outdoor heater for my friend when a hand came out of nowhere close to my face. I screamed at the top of my lungs, but it was only some chick wanting to warm her hands by the heater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 758

You deserved it 7 134

By Anonymous - 21/10/2010 21:44 - Canada

Today, l was crouched on the ground in the doorway at a haunted mansion. It's part of my job here to scare the people passing by. A 12 year-old girl walked by, I grabbed her leg, and she kicked me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 978

You deserved it 41 815

By Anonymous - 24/10/2009 00:40 - United States

Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 541

You deserved it 7 398

By Ariel_Mariaa - 04/11/2011 23:25 - Canada

Today, I went to see the latest Paranormal Activity movie with my mother. We were terrified and held hands at one point. The person sitting behind us thought it would be hilarious to abruptly scream into my mother's ear. She reacted by flailing and driving her arm straight into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 530

You deserved it 4 287

Got a little a carried away there, Skippy

By Anonymous - 31/10/2019 14:00 - Canada

Today, one of the houses had actors with chainsaws. I ran away screaming and slammed into a wall. So much for being macho this Halloween. FML

I agree, your life sucks 725

You deserved it 1 348

You big fanny

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 17:57 - Germany - Hagen

Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 434

You deserved it 31 280

By pussyOUT - 01/09/2009 06:30 - United States

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 223

You deserved it 16 099

sweetdreams20 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 9:06

so ur a male and a little girl told u out?! please don't say u were also on a date...

unfortunate_13 5

Tuesday 2 November 2010 9:07

OP, she's right.

Comments

ElectricGhost_fml 5

Tuesday 2 November 2010 9:21

hahahahaha that's pretty funny

ElectricGhost_fml 5

Tuesday 2 November 2010 9:22

oh yea I lovve haunted houses!!!

olarvman 5

Tuesday 2 November 2010 9:24

She's right, you should grow a pair.

Quest_ 13

Tuesday 2 November 2010 9:25

YDI for being an annoying, attention-seeking shrill noise generator.

chloec16 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 12:22

this^

nikkirl5 1

Tuesday 2 November 2010 9:28

she's kool !

BadMofeelius 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 9:45

She's my hero

CallMeHush 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 10:26

Dontcha just love them little kids?

JuliaM1000 10

Tuesday 2 November 2010 13:24

Hahaha ^ I'M SURE I DONT! Op^^^

ibitehard 9

Tuesday 2 November 2010 17:54

Kids say the cutest things xD

Lizza330 28

Tuesday 2 November 2010 10:33

I hope this is fake.... If not then I don't see why she wouldn't be scared also.

Lizza330 28

Tuesday 2 November 2010 11:29

Why did my comment get moderated?

milf762010 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 10:37

Wah wahh wahhh

Xavi89 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 11:01

lol!!!!!!!

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 024

You deserved it 21 116

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, the father of my kids, had been practically begging women to sleep with him throughout the duration of both pregnancies, and has also spent hundreds of dollars on OnlyFans every month. He promised to permanently delete OnlyFans three times and still hasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 544

You deserved it 583

The Top

Today, when I woke up I saw that my bald head is covered with my wife's period blood. Again. She does it regularly once a month, despite asking her not to. She thinks this blood activates hair growth. She is serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 238

You deserved it 511

Today, I checked this site to find out that my previous submission had made it onto the main page. This has been the sole highlight in my life for the past month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 782

You deserved it 212

Today, my boss phoned me and asked me why I wasn't at work. I was in the staff room. I said hello to her as I came in the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 827

You deserved it 2 631

Today, my boyfriend of a year told me he is at the point in his life where he is ready to start a family, get married and have a baby. He also casually stated that he wished he could meet someone he could see himself settling down with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 314

You deserved it 4 252

Today, at 10AM, I fried my $2000 work laptop by dropping a glass of water on the keyboard. One hour later, the IT tech gave me a new laptop with my former hard disk and I felt very lucky. Then, at 2PM, I dropped another glass of water on my keyboard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 435

You deserved it 7 396

Today, my (ex)girlfriend broke up with me because she read the horoscope and it stated that people of the Aquarius sign are toxic and emotionally volatile. I am Aquarius and did nothing wrong to my friends or family as far as I can recall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 031

You deserved it 94

Same thing different taste

Skittish

Got a little a carried away there, Skippy

You big fanny

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